I’m going to throw another one (two) out here since my neighbors do it all the time:
People who pull up and HONK and HONK at a house at some ungodly hour (4 am, 1 am, whatever) I mean not just a toot no, no a whopping WANK like they think this will make the person they want MATERIALIZE in front of the car! I wish they’d materialize in front of my car…
Last night around 10:30pm they decide, of all things to do at this hour, in a neighborhood of people who WORK for a living, to go out front and play soccer. Yep. It’s night, it’s dark and this assmunch is out there with his kid who can’t be any older than seven, screaming, yelling and kicking. It went on until midnight! And they wonder why no one on this block likes them…
Yeah, people blocking doorways and aisles. You always seem to be inconveniencing them when you try to pass by.
People who stick their head in my office and interrupt another meeting. These clowns just seem to assume that their problem is more important than anyone else’s.
People staring over my shoulder while I’m trying to type. I’m a poor typist to begin with. I don’t need them to watch me.
Turn signals, turn signals, turn signals. Up for left, down for right. What’s so hard to figure out?
Bad grammar and spelling in advertising.
I could go on, but then you guys would just add my name to your list of irritating things.
When you’re having a bad day and it seems like people are trying to piss you off, just remember, it takes 42 muscles to frown and only 4 to pullthe trigger of a decent sniper rifle.
Abstainer:a weak person who yields to the temptation of denying himself a pleasure. - Ambrose Bierce
Here in Pennsylvania we have a litter bug hotline. If you see someone throwing trash or cig butts out of a car you just take down the license plate, model and color and give 888-litterbug a call. Let them know date/time/location and they send the owner of the car a nasty letter. How embarassing would that be??
I must confess I’ve used this a number of times and always have a pen and paper ready in the car. Unfortunely this happens all the time and it really irks me.
Another pet peave: people who don’t clean up after their dog takes a dump! I have two very large dogs of my own and I ALWAYS clean up after them. Keep 'em at home and let 'em crap in your own yard if you don’t want to bother with the mess!
People greeting each other at the airport by Charlie Foxtrotting just outside the gate. See also Escalator CFing.
People who use a their own personal substitiute for the ICAO phonetic alphabet. “See as in Cat, Eff as in Frank” Sheesh !! I have even heard Flight Attendants do this !
People that pull out in front of you when there is no one behind you when all they had to do is wait 4 more seconds.
Said before but again for emphasis: Chewing gum littering, tailgaiting.
Most of annoyances here belong to the YMFU Yea Me, Fuck You (Pronounced ‘I’m Foo’) class of folks.
Oblio
A point in every direction is like no point at all
When you are considered anti social because you really don’t drink and everyone around you is getting hammered. My response usually, " I’ m on the wagon."
People who ask you a personal question that is none of their friggin’ business and then get their noses bent out of joint when you tell them to MYOB.
And my final beef, of ten thousand 9 the list is shortened: Perpetually perky people. someone should sterlized them.
When traffic is backed up, and you decide to be nice and let someone who’s been waiting a while pull out, and the jerks behind them think that means you’ve decided to permit the entire parking lot to empty in front of you.
When the traffic is backed up so badly that you’re not sure you’ll be able to clear the intersection while the light’s still green, and some moron on the cross street decides this is a justification for him to turn right on red (thereby blocking it even further).
Wow, I thought I was the only one. I’ll be having a perfectly good time not drinking until one of my drunk coworkers comes up and picks on me for no reason other than the fact that I ordered a 7up/Sprite instead of something alcoholic. Maybe they don’t mind mixing alcohol with the particular anti-depressant they’re on that week but I’m not taking the chance of mixing my particular prescriptions with alcohol. Besides, my stages of intoxication go:
Abnormally warm
Unimpaired mental ability but decreased ability to control my motor movement
Migraine
Not much fun.
Anyway, I could see them getting upset if I was chastizing them for drinking but I don’t. I don’t care what they drink (unless they’re driving but I’ve never had to say anything since I haven’t caught one trying to drive drunk). Why do they care so much what I drink?
People who are not handicapped parking in handicapped spots. I’m talking about eh folks who have no handicapped plates or markers on their cars whatsoever. I know that some handicaps are not visible (i.e heart & lung problems that make walking difficult), but these people usually do get handicap plates. The ones that really cheese me off are the ones that just aren’t handicapped. I personally will drive around a parking lot for a freaking hour before I’ll take one of those spots. I’d love to use one, since I’m about 7 months pregnant, and walking from BFE into a store is difficult now, but pregnancy isn’t considered a handicap. I do like what our local Farmer Jack’s has done, though…thoughtfully provided parking spaces marked with a little stork, especially for pregnant women.
Christi, I am with you on the schmucks who park in the handicap spot who aren’t handicapped. Although the only time the offense is really noticeable is at Christmas. It’s like " Gee, grandpa one leg, can I borrow your handicap sticker to get a good spot at the mall?" It’s the only time the spots are all full.
I’ve locked one guy out of his car because he 1) was phsycially fit 2) had no sticker and there was about 3000 other spaces for him to chose, like the one next to the H-spot. I told him to move his car over one spot ( explaining that my 4 brothers are all disabled, mom’s disabled and father in law is paralized, etc) He ignored me and went in to order his sandwich. I went to his open car window, (keys in ignition) locked the doors with the power locks and went back inside that sub shop using the payphone to call the cops to report him. God, was he pissed, and the cop showed no mercy. I just sat inside eating my sandwich, watching his misery with glee.
Another irritant, I think its been said before, people who toss their cigerettes out the window. Use your ashtray!
I think the biggest irritant about people tossing their butts out is that the police don’t give a good goddamn about it. I’ve seen many butts fly out of police cars. Elevator ettiquette (lack there of) bothers me also. The following rules apply:
Those people that come out of driveways in big clunkers and pull out part way into traffic to get out of their place.Then sit there while people nearly scrape their cars on the car of this character and ignore him/her.
Near where I live in Gardena, California, is a large store that has its trash dumpsters emptied by a big truck at 3:30 a.m. Imagine! This lot is surrounded by residential blocks and it must wake up a lot of people–including the sick, babies who muist start howling at the top of their lungs, people who need an hour more of sleep before they have to get up to go to work in the morning. etc.
The next time this wakes me up I am going to go out there with a camera and tape recorder; what I gather I will take to the Gardena city agency that issues business licenses and make a formal complaint.
After all, sound waves don’t stop at property lines.
“The signs don’t apply to illiterates.” --Al Jaffee
People who don’t leave messages on the answering machine. It’s there for a reason, use it.
People who water their lawns with sprinklers when it’s POURING rain! (Even if you have an automatic timed system, it can still be shut off manualy) This is basically because I HATE to see food, and water being wasted.
I swear I have a billion pet peeves, but these were the first off the top of my head.
Oh. And people who go to the “fast lane” in the grocery store and check out five-ten more items than you’re supposed to. If it says 15 items, what are ya doin’ with 30?
I can live with people who drive the wrong way down the rows in the parking lot.
I can live with people who refuse to back up when meeting someone going the RIGHT way down the rows in the parking lot.
But when you HONK YOUR HORN at me because I’m not backing up fast enough and you’re going the wrong way down the row, expect me to sit there until hell freezes over!
– Sylence
“A friend of mine once sent me a post card with a picture of the entire planet Earth taken from space. On the back it said, ‘Wish you were here’.” - Steven Wright
You too? This usually happens when i’m at my friend Ann’s house and our group of friends is having a small party. She’s always trying to get me drunk. One time she had some of her high school friends (people she graduated with), there and they tried so hard to get me to get drunk. I really don’t care what they think and refuse until they give up in disgust, usually i end it with “I have to drive home tonight”. On the other hand, half of our group doesn’t drink, so i’m not the only sober one at parties.
Littering: The place we first lived when we moved out here had a playground for the kids. It was one of those wood-chip kinda deals, so the kiddies wouldn’t get boo-boos when they bit the dust while playing. Unless tenanus and serrated gouges count as boo-boos? It seems the entire freakin apartment community thought the really cool place to chuck all their beer bottle caps was into the playground. Nevermind the THREE HUGE GARBAGE CANS, just throw them in the wood chips where they can rust and injure the kiddies.
People who walk slowly in malls, alongside 75 of their slow-moving pals, and don’t notice that you’re taking little clipped steps a half a breath behind them and dodging back and forth trying to get around them.
Public spitting. Especially of mucous. If I have nowhere to spit, I swallow it. I’ve done this for 27 years and I’m JUST FINE. YOU WILL LIVE.
Smokers who don’t ask before lighting up in your house, or coming inside with a lit cigarette. I had a friend somewhere once tell me that they had some relative who would smoke anyway, even when told to stop. This relative apparently would use a drink cup for an ashtray. This pissed me off, even though it wasn’t me it was happening to! Shit, if someone did that at my house, I’d tell them to leave, and I wouldn’t care if they were the Queen of England! If they wouldn’t leave, I’d call the police.
I had one guy light up in my house, after being told he couldn’t smoke inside, and he looked at me like I was a bitch and said “well I’m GOING outside in just a MINUTE” Guess who never ever ever came over to our house again?
People online who get miffed at me because I say “no thanks” when they offer to send me a photo of themself. Sorry, but I don’t give a rat’s ass what you look like if you’re a perfect stranger!
People who drag their kids around, then don’t pay any attention to them (like ignoring them when they say “mom?” etc…)
People who say the internet isn’t “real life” (yeah, what are we, pretend? Sorry, but I’m a real person, and so is everyone reading this.)
UncleBeer: “Turn signals, turn signals, turn signals. Up for left, down for right. What’s so hard to figure out?”
Maybe my car is defective, but my turn signals work just the opposite.
I hate it when people drive past my house (or, worse, when my neighbors across the street who apparently don’t own an inside stereo park their car in their yard and crank up the car stereo so they can hear it in the house) with that awful window-rattling bass thumping, especially when I’m trying to sleep and/or I have a migraine, and the bass is cranked up so high that all you hear is this bvvvvvfffft! bvvvft! bvvvvvvvvfft!
Thank you, Holly, for mentioning that UNBELIEVABLY LOUD BASS playing. I can’t stand that (many expletives) stuff.
On that same track, what’s with the huge pants that hang to the knees? Am I the only one who wants to just yank those suckers up, and say “HEY! You don’t go out in public with your underwear showing!”
Hey, Cristi: Do you remember * Cracked * mazagine in the 70s?
One annual had some do-it-yourself greeting cards stapled in. One was “To a Stereo Aficionado” and the message read in part:
“…your music couldn’t be sweeter
But kindly turn your volume down
Or I’ll kick in both your tweeters!!”
