It takes me two buses to get to work. Unfortunately, to connect from one to the other I have walk diagonally across Seattle’s shopping ground zero: the big shopping center with a fountain in the middle and surrounded by all the biggest stores. It’s Seattle’s answer to the Mag Mile or 5th Ave. And I have no choice but to shoulder my way through the obnoxious white people festooned with greed, false cheer, and shopping bags.
Today, as I approached the halfway point of this no-man’s land, I saw a group of, what, not protesters exactly. They were holding signs that said “BUY MORE STUFF!”
Now, of course, I thought this was a hoot. I was totally on their side, as it were. But as I passed the group, a white chick with dreadlocks, dressed entirely in third-world textiles, said to me, directly, “Thank you for buying more stuff, sir!”
I didn’t respond, but in l’esprit d’escalier, I muttered under my breath as I continued past her, “I’m on my way to my minimum wage job, you cunting bitch, where I will have to deal with these obnoxious acquisitors for eight thankless hours.”
I was sympathetic to their message, as long as it was a general message broadcast to the shopping crowds at large. But by singling me out, she made assumptions about me as an individual. She blew it. Plus she smelled like a cross between patchouli and goats.
I don’t even understand being sympathetic to their message, honestly. If it wasn’t for people buying more stuff, you wouldn’t have your job, and a lot of other people would be out of work, too.
But, yeah…I hate it when protesters make assumptions about individuals…that’s total bullshit. I passed a war protest the other day, and a guy was holding a “honk for peace” sign. I didn’t honk (I was trying to drive, you know), and the guy yelled something at me angrily. You know, not everyone who isn’t out on the sidewalk with you is the enemy…some of us have jobs to get to and other such unimportant timewasters. Way to help your cause.
Next time ask them if their signs magically appeared. Or their clothes. Or their cigarettes. Or food. Or the gas they bought for their car. I’m all for being as un-materialistic as possible, but I hate the double-standard types who bitch and moan about you, but don’t realize they are just as guilty.
In my opinion, only the guy on Survivorman has room to bitch at anyone about how we live our lives - he and his wife lived off of the wilderness of Canada for several years. To the rest of them I say “hello pot, I’m kettle”.
Hey, I know her! She comes into my store every day, snaps her fingers and tries to make us all jump and pant and run in circles for her. Now, now, now, she says! Time is money! While everyone else waits in line or has an order waiting, she must be served first and promptly. Also, please make this in environmentally friendly paint, because I’m all about the environment and my cool stankin’ dreads, organic cotton clad ass, and designer glasses. Everyone else, apparently, sales associates, customers, and all, are worthless.
Oh, the irony if it was her. It wouldn’t surprise me in the least. Unfortunately, they’re about a dime a dozen around here. I could throw my mocha chai latte in any direction and hit half a dozen of them.
You never hear it anymore over here, but at one point years and years ago, the Thais used the English word “hippie” as a synonym for “jerk” or “asshole.” It was very funny to listen to them using it, too. You could be dressed to the nines like a Wall Street banker, but if you had pissed someone off, you’d be called a “hippie.” Then their perplexed look would be priceless when you started laughing about it.
One local long-term American newspaper writer here has a good story about giving a bad review for a new restaurant opened by a very high-society lady. He said the food really was incredibly bad, but she flew into a rage after his review. Called him up and said he was nothing but a “dirty hippie” among other things, which if you knew what he looked like, that really was funny. Since she was high society, rather than improve the restaurant, she used he connections to get him removed from restaurant reviews. That’s the way it works here.
Why do people continue to wear patchouli? That is one of the foulest smelling scents I’ve known people to intentionally put on their bodies. Makes me gag.
Unfortunately, we live in a society where (most) people must buy things to live. There may be a few exceptions, but I don’t see why a bunch of protesters would waste their time. I doubt a single shopper turned around and went home because of their message. Making people angry is not a good way to get them to see your side of an argument.
Well, I don’t feel any guilt about my own consumerism, but then I don’t make a lot of status purchases. If you do buy stuff with the intention of having people judge you according to what you buy, you really can’t get upset when people judge you according to what you buy.
Getting people pissed off at them seems to be the usual tactic with a certain segment of the protesting populace. Like the idiots who think they are drawing attention to issues by snarling traffic in crowded city centers by walking through them, or biking through them.
Well, this has got me to thinking, like a fly buzzing around the cornbread in my brain pan.
Thing is, I recall hearing a number of these complaints, and finding it odd. Hung out with these sorts of people most of my life. Over all, they are a cheerful and positive bunch, not the sort to scream hostility at complete strangers.
Odder still, it seems that they direct this ugly anthropoid behavior at people who already don’t much like them, but are entirely innocent of any offense (other than being too busy to honk a horn, it being way in the middle of the steering wheel, and all…) Nope, they didn’t give off any of the subtle signs and postures we monkeys do when we are saying “I don’t like you!”, and yet were victimized without provocation!
Which is kinda weird. Its almost as if you guys give off some form of radiation or…what could you calll it?..a “vibe”? I mean, you haven’t said a thing, done anything, maybe can’t even be clearly seen…yet they already know you don’t like hippies!
I have also hung out with these sorts of folks most of my life. I have also found that often they are a cheerful and positive bunch. But not typically so when they are protesting something.
Sorry, I don’t honk my horn while I’m driving to make political statements. I only honk in case of emergencies, such as if another car is about to hit me. It’s sort of a principle of mine to try to be a safe driver. Not to mention that honking to make a political statement is pointless and stupid.
How could I give off a subtle sign or posture of not liking someone from inside my car? It’s not like I gave him the finger or anything. I was just driving along, chatting with my daughter and apparently showing some sort of tacit support for the war by ignoring his sign.
Whatever do you mean? Some of my best friends are hippies. I live and walk amongst them every day, and have a decided fondness for many of them.
It’s not like it’s rocket science. If the person in question has bathed more recently than last week, is wearing clothes that have actually seen a washing machine once in their life, has an honest job and isn’t drooling in the street, indicating an IQ higher than 7, well, they probably don’t like hippies. Common sense.