In another thread I was talking about my first panic attack, or so they called it at the hospital. I was out walking my dog last month and it hit me out of nowhere. I crawled up on a womans step and got her to call me an ambulance. I have never in my life felt anything like that,it scared the shit out of me and I have not been the same since. I know I have had a huge amount of stress in my life lately, but thinking back to the things I have seen and been through, I don’t understand why this happened. Nothing has ever bothered me before. This is really taking its toll on me.
So what I would like to know is how you feel when the anxiety/panic kicks in. Also has anyone ever gotten over this? or am I doomed to this for the rest of my life?
In my experience, panic attacks can be pretty successfully treated by a knowledgeable clinician, but it is important that you begin that treatment early. If you leave the panic untreated and it recurs, you may very well start avoiding whatever situation you believe triggered that awful feeling, and you can eventually end up with a personal world that gets smaller and smaller and more and more empty.
My experience with panic attacks began as yours did, with a sudden, terrifying attack that came out of the blue, seemingly unrelated to the stress that were affecting me (the terminal illness of a loved one with all its accoutrements). For me there was a sense of becoming disconnected from myself, like I was observing from a distance. My face and lips would go numb and my ears would ring. My legs and arms would get weak and shaky. Sometimes I would experience a strong sense of deja vu that was much more distressing than the usual, “Hey, I bet I can guess what comes next!” I would have cold sweats, palpitations and nausea.
Eventually, as the panic attacks returned again and again in assorted locations and situations, I became virtually homebound. Fortunately, I did get hooked up with a very competent and compassionate cognitive-behavioral therapist who was able to help me with them, and I’m rarely troubled by panic these days. If I do have a panic attack, I’m able to recognize it for what it is instead of the IMMINENT DOOM!!! that once sent me running for cover. Then I just sit back (or stand still or whatever) and experience the feelings, cataloguing them and reminding myself that feeling that way is not going to do me any harm.
It is important that you address the stressors in your life. Chronic low- or mid-level stress can be extremely destructive, and you’re not as likely to have a support system in place to help you with it as you would in the case of a family emergency or that sort of thing.
This is what is happening to me now and it is so out of character for me that it’s scary.
Well that is part of the problem right there. I have have had six years of chronic stress plus two family emergencies with no support system in place and a third one happening now. On top of that throw in a few lawsuits with no lawyer and some financial issues and it’s quite the recipe for disaster.
The other issue that I have been struggling with is the fact that no matter how much punishment I have given to this beat up sack of bones that drags me around, it has never once failed me, until now. To be honest it kinda freaked me out. Don’t get me wrong I have broken bones, separated shit that was supposed to stay together, torn ligaments and a bunch of other stuff, but I always bounced right back.This time I am having a hard time getting out of bed.
The reason I asked this question is that lately I seem to be developing some pretty serious health anxiety since the panic attack and am wondering if all these new aches and pains are coming from the anxiety issues.
Oh, I understand that. Those are always the things that are the most stressful, aren’t they? However, you can address the way you process that stress and the way you react to it, and IMO the best way to do that is with a good counselor. There will be others who will have different suggestions for you, too, but I think the core issue is learning how to deal with the stress without it causing you so much anxiety.
I think health anxiety is pretty common for people with panic and anxiety problems. It’s pretty easy to believe you are having a heart attack or a stroke when these symptoms occur. I haven’t read your other thread yet, but I’m assuming the ER cleared you from a cardiac standpoint during your visit, but it would help your state of mind to have a thorough physical just to make sure there’s nothing exacerbating these feelings. Hyperthyroidism, for instance, can lead to feelings of nervousness and panic, as can hyperglycemia in some people, and both of those can be easily ruled out with simple lab tests.
The day the ambulance took me to the hospital they did all the cardiac work including two sets of bloodwork to confirm it was not a heart attack and said all was clear. My new family doc just did a complete blood and urine test and confirmed that everything was bang on. I have had chronic right shoulder pain for about seven weeks and the xray showed nothing was wrong. I am guessing it is from the stress and constantly tensing my muscles.
I think another big problem for me is that I have never been stressed in my life, and the body failing me for the first time along with stress, it is completely new to me and I have no idea how to deal with it.
I co-lead an anxiety support group in real life, and Sudden Kestrel has told you pretty much everything I would say to a new group member. Your story of stress building and building then having a panic attack out of the blue is a very common one with new members in our group. Panic is a terrible feeling, but it is JUST a feeling, and it won’t hurt you, and you probably won’t feel like this for the rest of your life - anxiety is very common, and there are many treatments available.
As mentioned, Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) is recommended for anxiety disorders. Medication is a big topic of debate in anxiety circles - as far as I read, the best treatment is a combination of both, but CBT is as effective as medications in treating anxiety/panic disorders, without the possible liver damage (not to give you even MORE health anxiety). What we usually tell people is that if you aren’t even living your life due to anxiety, take the meds, but don’t do JUST meds - make sure you do some work on the things in your life that brought you to a place where you are using anxiety as a coping mechanism in the first place.
If you want to chat some more, please feel free to PM me.
The meds issue is a big one for me as I won’t take an aspirin fora headache, so I am definitely not very fond of taking something that has side effects that are potentially worse than what I am going through right now. I figure that if squishy (my brain) got me into this than squishy will get me out. I have always been very headstrong and not afraid of challenges but this one seems different. I have played sports all my life and since the first attack, which happened while out walking, I have been afraid to exercise. I have not played baseball in about a month and for the first time in almost forty years I probably won’t be playing hockey this year. That in itself is heartbreaking tome and just adds to the stress .
This is a huge issue for me and is the cause of about 90% of my problems. There seems to be nothing I can do to fix any of this. I have tried for years to resolve the issues that led to these problems, and trying to resolve them has led to more problems. As I said in another thread the story is so bizarre that it borders on unbelievable to most who hear it, including my doctors. After carefully explaining all the details they come around and understand where I am coming from. Unfortunately I can’t get into the details on a message board but you can take my word for it , it has been a strange yet eye opening journey. After seeing a shrink for almost three years he wrote in his report that meds would be of no help to me given the circumstances and told me that there was really nothing he could do for me. He wished me luck and told me to call him if I needed him. The psychologist that I have seen for about four years told me to stop talking because I was depressing him. Of course he was half joking but that is the way this whole thing has been playing out, like some kind of weird joke.
I’ve never had such a severe panic attack (although one may be coming: I’m moving to a new town and about to start a new job, the first job I’ve had outside of grad school), but I have had what I think are classified as attacks.
First, my pulse quickens and I become aware of every heart beat. Then, my lips and fingers go numb, followed by an odd tingling sensation in my lower back teeth. Lastly, I become agitated, as if I want to go run a mile, but feel paralyzed. By now I’m extremely irritable and lash out if people try to help (think of a dog with an injury biting a well-meaning owner trying to take a look). I really turn into a different person.
Sorry to double post, but I just saw this and I thought it warranted a separate reply.
I understand where you are coming from with regard to psychiatrists and psychologists not being able to help. I’ve been seeing a psychiatrist, an expert in psychopharmacology, who has essentially told me that there is no medicine in the world that can alleviate my symptoms. She sees CBT as the only solution. She tried to get me into a CBT clinic, but the psychiatrist in charge of that wanted to talk to my therapist first. They kept playing phone tag for weeks, and I was the ultimate loser because my time ran out: I’m moving in two days to start my first post-graduate job.
My therapist has told me that I have outstanding insight into my problems. Usually, a good portion of therapy (as I understand it) is getting people to understand why they do what they do so that they can begin to change their thinking patterns. I know perfectly well why I do what I do, and I know intellectually how I should approach situations. The best analogy is that of a chain-smoking cardiologist: knows perfectly well what the habit is doing, but is unwilling or unable to really change. The bad part about insight is that I have trouble following through on my therapy “homework” because in the back of my mind I know what they’re trying to get me to see and do with these assignments. So rather than let the assignments shape new thought patterns, I usually end up writing what my therapist wants to hear because I want a “good grade” on the assignment.
I have found comfort though a local NAMIsupport group. It helps because they don’t do group therapy; it’s simply peer support (basically what we’re all doing in this thread). Might be something to check out.
You should consider an appliance for your mouth for when you sleep, as you are no doubt clenching when you sleep and it is possibly causing the pain in your shoulder. Honestly, it can cause pain all over. Speak to your dentist, they can get you pointed in the right direction.
You should rely on your dog more when you are feeling stressed. Talk to him, brush him, stroke him, even massage him. Hold on tight to him if you are around him and having a panic attack.
Dogs can be registered as working dogs/helper dogs just for keeping their owner calm. I was on a flight a few weeks ago with a woman and her beagle, and the beagle had been her pet for many years before she (the beagle) became a registered working dog.
The last 2 big attacks I had, I relied on my dog. The last one I had in front of her, while we were out together, and she just sat with me. It’s pretty amazing how dogs can be.
I, too, have severe Generalized Anxiety Disorder Nothing much to add for now, but people are always saying that panic can’t hurt or kill you. It sure as shit can when you pass out behind the wheel of your car, or your hands become stiff claws, making it impossible to steer your car. That’s what always worries me. Myself be damned, I just don’t want to hurt anyone else.
JFLuvly my sympathies. I had mine a few months ago; and I know EXACTLY what you mean. It does feel like that your body is betraying you and it is very hard.
My advise
See a doctor and ask about medications. Ultimately only you can stop the attacks; but medications such as Inderal ( a low dose) can help calm you enough until you can control yourself.
Look back on your attacks. Although now they might seem to be coming out of the blue; as you will look back you will note that you were building up to them (having stressful thoughts feeling a bit more anxious as time went by in the lead up).
For God’s sake don’t start reading online Med sources such as Web Md, you will only convince yourself that the tests you had are inadequet and you really are suffering from a heart disease.
They will come and go. You will get additional attacks there is no switch that you can put on or off. But they get more spaced out and lessor in intensity and duration as time goes on. Don’t beat up yourself for having one.
It is a horrid place to be in. But it will get better.
After I got laid off from the job I’d had for 14 years, the only professional job I’d had since getting my degree, I was waking up with a panic attack every morning. I’d sit up like I awoke from a nightmare and breathe heavily for several minutes.
Then a couple years later, after I finally got a call that I was hired and had a job again, I had another panic attack about starting the new job.
I immediately called my mom to tell her the news, who was staying with my grandmother at the time. For some reason, I didn’t hear the ringing on my side, so when my grandmother answered I didn’t know she had answered. Before she could say “hello”, she heard the heavy breathing of my panic attack and thought it was an obscene caller!
I’ve been taking sertraline (generic Zoloft), and also I’ve been laid off and started new jobs several times, so that stuff doesn’t bother me much anymore. I can’t really say if it’s the meds or simply having gone through that stuff already that’s calmed me down. Probably both, so some degree.
Well last night I got a call from the therapists office and they had a cancellation so I got in to see him this morning. I find my anxiety goes through the roof when I have to drive anywhere so getting in there was hell, which is odd because I always loved to drive. The drive home was worse and to top things off on the way home my wife called to tell me that Adult Protective Services was at the house to deal with my Aunt. By the time I got home my anxiety was through the roof and I had to deal with an hour and a half of getting my Aunt put in a nursing home on an emergency placement, from this thread here: http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?p=14126766#post14126766 . As much as I hate to do it, I have to. I can no longer take care of her on my own and it’s causing me way too much stress. This is one of the few things that I can control,so by putting her in a nursing home it will be one less thing on my plate.
Over the last few days I have been doing a lot of reading and thinking, after talking to the doctor this morning I have come to a few conclusions that I think may help me. I can see how this happened and I realise that it’s going to be up to me to fix it. The last six or seven years have been extremely stressful. I was very reluctant to admit that this stress was causing me anxiety and that most of my current problems stemmed from the anxiety. I think that I allowed the anxiety to take over because I truly believed that there were physical issues from the accident, which was causing the anxiety. I still believe that this is true but the anxiety issues have taken over and are causing me physical symptoms that I contribute to the accident when they are probably just symptoms of anxiety.
I have to take my Aunt to an emergency doctors appointment right now for the nursing home placement but I will finish this later. I have typed too much to start over,sorry. Thanks to all for the input so far, it has helped. It’s nice to know that I am not the only one feeling this.
I’m virtually homebound due to panic attacks too. Recent events have forced me to get out in the world more and it’s just about killing me. Years of practicing avoidance have made my reactions much, much stronger when I do have to face triggers. And those triggers have multiplied all this time so I often feel like I’m a walking nightmare.
The attacks are much like Sudden Kestrel describes. Sometimes there’s some added symptoms. Like I’ve always loved learning about science and astronomy but lately I can’t look at images of anything space-related because I feel myself shrinking. I really do. I feel myself shrinking. And I realize how ridiculous this sounds, but that’s the only way to describe it. I feel like I’m shrinking and it sends me straight into a panic. I’ve noticed lately sometimes when I read about history the same thing happens. I start thinking about how small and insignificant I am and I feel that tightness building up in my chest. My lips feel numb and my neck feels squeezy and I HAVE to stop reading or watching whatever it was or…well hell I don’t know what would happen because I always stop.
Also I’ve been having some trouble driving because I feel like I’m being pulled to the side, especially on bridges. I have visions of going off the side. I’m usually able to push them away, and I’d say this is relatively mild in comparison to other anxieties because I can usually drive with no problem if I have the radio on or company with me.
I have my first appointment with a counselor on the 16th. From there I’m hoping to qualify for mental health assistance. Fingers crossed.
I apologise for the length but I started typing and could not stop, this is the first time I have put this to words and it kinda feels good.
Rushgeekgirl
Wow that sucks. I guess I am pretty lucky and hopefully I can kick this in the ass before it gets that bad. I can definitely see how it can happen over the course of years. It’s only been about a month since I had my first panic attack and I’m hoping that before it gets too out of hand I can get a grip on it. Up until the last few days I didn’t truly believe that it was a panic attack and I really thought something was very wrong with me. The real health anxiety issues started a few years ago when I ran up the stairs at home. I was under a lot of stress at the time and when I reached the top of the stairs I had a strange feeling in my chest, the first thing I did was to check my carotid pulse. Big Mistake! My heart was skipping beats and that scared the shit out of me.
You have to realise that I was electrocuted a few years before and at this point the doctors had no idea what kind of long term effects this may have had on me. I had some physical issues from the accident that were not all that bad but some of them were unexplainable from a medical standpoint. They were treating this a a brain injury but stopped after two neuropsych exams over 18 months showed that most of my scores fell in the superior range. They then began to think it was all because of PTSD and anxiety, but every doctor had conflicting reports. Most of these doctors were ones that I spent 20 minutes to a half hour talking to. The shrink I saw for about three years said…
He did not seem to think it was a psychiatric issue at all, so I tended to side with him because he had the most insight as he had spent the most time with me and he is also considered to be one of the best around here.
So after that first pulse check and finding a physical symptom it started to become a habit. Every time I would get a flutter in my chest I would check my pulse. If something did not feel right I would have, what I now assume was an anxiety attack and one of my biggest symptoms was that feeling of depersonalization. This to me was a feeling that I can only describe as like not being in your own body or kinda like having a good buzz going but also feeling like I was very lightheaded and going to pass out. Now normally this would not have been a bad thing, except for the part about passing out, but when it was happening randomly in the middle of the afternoon it was as scary as hell to me. These feelings started happening all the time…when I was driving, going into a store and sitting around talking to friends. As this went on over a few years it was interfering with everything I would do, and getting worse. It got to the point where just the fear of it happening was stopping me from doing stuff. I had myself convinced that these were all part of the brain injury or some type of cardiac event, and to be honest I am just now trying to convince myself that it is just anxiety. These things would happen when I was playing hockey and being a goalie I had no place to go sit and ride it out. I could not concentrate on the game and it was interfering with my ability to stop pucks. I was playing some higher end hockey and nobody there wants a goalie who can’t focus and the team loses games. I wound up just playing a scrub rental once a week and this really bothered me a lot.
I finally got over the palpitations but could not break myself of the habit of checking my pulse and I still had no answers about what had happened to me from the accident. I was a 6 day a week gym rat and the lightheadedness was happening there and made it difficult to work out so I stopped going after my gym partner moved away for work. He was a good friend and was aware of my problems.
For some reason my laptop is screwing up and I have had to retype portions of this twice now. I am going to post this much before I lose it and have to start over
My first panic attack hit me when I was about 17 or so, I was laying in bed late one night and wham. It hit me and I knew that I was going to die within the next 5 or 10 minutes and there wasn’t a damn thing I could do about it.
Then no more for a good while, 'til they started up again when I was about 20. I’d be going about my business and next thing I knew I couldn’t – well, do anything. I never got palpitations, never cried or started shaking - mine was all this internal, stark terror and the thought that I was literally about to drop dead.
I haven’t had a true panic attack in … gosh … 11 or 12 years? They just stopped. I do recall feeling panicky after my mom died but I don’t think that was a panic attack, just grief.
So yes, someone out there has gotten over it - me. You’re not doomed for the rest of your life. Damned if I know what’s gonna work for you (I have no idea why mine stopped), but just because you’re having them now doesn’t mean they’ll always be around.
IMO, the best way to prove to yourself that it IS all just anxiety would be to take an anti-anxiety medication and see if it makes the attacks go away (prozac, xanax, weed, whatever they will prescribe you). If it doesn’t, then either you haven’t found the right med, or maybe it really is something else. But if a huge team of doctors couldn’t find it, why are you worrying? It’s not like there’s anything you can do about it, you know?
Lots of people have arrhythmias, too. It’s not necessarily indicative of a major health problem. My heart beats faster when I inhale and slower when I exhale, and it’s been happening for my entire life (as far as I can tell). I didn’t even know it was classified as an arrhythmia until I was 19, I thought everyone’s heart just did that all the time. My sister got diagnosed with a “heart murmur” that never affected her in any way whatsoever (it was accidentally discovered after she had a febrile seizure at age 5 and was monitored overnight in the hospital just in case). They diagnosed it when she was a kid, she continued doing all the stuff that kids do, and maybe she still has it/maybe not.
So I think if you try an anti-anxiety med and read up on all the benign reasons that arrhythmias can exist, maybe you would stop worrying so much about yours.
Keep on going to the gym; it is a lot less healthier for the heart (and you generally) to be sedentary then not. Go slowly and take one thing at a time; this is a philosophy you can apply everywhere. Slowly ease yourself back in.
Per the feeling that something is wrong with your heart. I know that; I had/have it though thank god its less now (still get it sometime). Just remind yourself when you are feeling anxious about your heart of all the previous times you felt that way…and did not die or have a heart attack. You don’t get transient heart attacks; if you were going to get one; you would have had it already.
You have had the tests done, trust your physician. And yes I know that some tests are not conclusive, but the fact that they decided not to ask for additional tests means that you are fine and it was not necessary.
And finally; yes you will recover, You and I don’t have it so bad; we can still function and do what needed to be done; pity the ones who cannot.
