Anxiety/Stress Relief

I’m very stressed in my day-to-day life, and there doesn’t seem to be anything in my life that would justify such a high level of stress. Most of the stress is social; that is, somehow concerned with what others think of me.

Anyway, I’d like to hear first-hand (or second-hand) accounts of stress relief. You can find websites about this sort of thing on the web, but before I take a course of action for stress reduction I’d really like to hear stories of people reducing the stress in their lives (or in the lives of people they knew first or second-hand).

By the way, do any of the following work:

[ul]
[li]Meditation: Does it actually work to reduce stress?[/li][li]Do people mellow out with age? Around what age?[/li][li]Religion: If I believe in God, will I be happier and more relaxed?[/li][li]Any other activities that would reduce stress?[/li][li]Anything else?[/li][/ul]

IANAD or counselor or therapist, but I do speak from my own experience.

Your definition of social stress (i.e., concern about what others think about you) is the way my anxiety expressed itself. It took me a long time to figure out that so many of my stressors were anxiety-related. It was so much simpler for me to try to attribute my stress to something else.

My suggestion is talk to a counselor. He/she might refer you to someone who can prescribe medication, if that seems appropriate.

Once I got on the right medication, I was amazed by all the anxieties and fears that fell by the wayside.

Yes. I have found that simple meditation has helped me to become more centered. I didn’t have to take a class or study transcendental meditation. Just some simple guidelines were all that I needed.

I am 63. My growing has been done in stages over time. I’m still growing. It’s a process that lasts a lifetime if you are lucky. I was a very late bloomer and didn’t feel any confidence at all until I was in my late twenties.

Travelling all by myself one summer in Europe helped a lot. It was scared to do it, but I just bought a ticket and did it anyway.

I don’t know. I think that my belief has taught me to let go when I can’t fix things. But I didn’t have to believe in order to learn that lesson. I believe because there in something inside of me that compels me and because I have experienced the most profound understanding that I cannot put into words and that lasted for only a short time. But it was enough. And I am more relaxed sometimes because of it. More hopeful.

Exercise, especially a brisk walk.

Creativity --the kind where you get so absorbed in what you are doing that you lose track of time and forget to eat and put off going to the bathroom.

Lose yourself (find yourself) in a subject: Chess, a particular writer or philosopher, writing haiku, learning to draw, planning a trip to a country, learning a language, learning to play the balalika, taking an online course in film from Berkley, learning all you can about wolves, knitting, wabi-sabi, learn, learn, learn…

Read the essay “Self-Reliance” by Ralph Waldo Emerson. Read it again. Then read Walden by his friend Henry David Thoreau. If you get a chance, go to where they lived in Concord, Massachusetts. Visit Walden Pond.

Be of service to someone else. Maybe join Amnesty International.

One thing is most important to know. Sometimes our brain chemistry causes us to feel stress and anxiety. When that happens, it is not our fault. It is not a character flaw or a weakness. You made need medication to balance out that chemistry. No big deal. Just talk with your physician.

Anything else?

A lot of people don’t like self-help books, but I found some of them to be really good. Look for something with a title that speaks to your problem with feeling self-confident or worrying too much about what other people are thinking. Or maybe someone else in this thread can recommend something along those lines.

I will tell you that a lot of the time people are just wondering what you are thinking of them. :slight_smile:

Oh. One more thing. At one point when I was teaching, I had such a problem with anxiety that I kept a spray bottle of water in the regrigerator in the faculty lounge. From time to time I would just go there and spray cold water in my face. It helped! At home, I would put my face into a bowl of ice water with ice cubes. It seemed to sort of shock my system. (I got the idea from seeing Paul Newman do it in a movie – The Sting, I think.

Don’t put up with feeling bad for long without seeing your doctor, hear?