Any alcohol-free hard liquor out there?

[Rick]

So what if we set up a still with lab glassware.
A large flask for to hold 750ml of single malt, and a condenser and collection flask for the alcohol that boils off.
Pour in 750 ml of Glen-whatever and heat.
After a while we should wind up with a small amount of non-alcoholic more or less single malt tasting residual in the first flask, and a flask of kick-a-poo joy juice in the other.
Dilute the residual back to 750 ml, and it should taste somewhat like Scotch.
All of this assumes that the things that give a single malt is distinctive taste will not evaporate more slowly or not at all when compared to the alcohol.

I still don’t know if this is a good idea for someone that has had issues with alcohol.

[silenus]

But, since all the flavor components are carried to the final booze in steam form, the likelihood of being able to strip away the alcohol without removing most or all of these components is effectively nil.

[Larry_Borgia]

@Tijuana_Golds

Why would anybody drink that? It would just be some type of crappy juice.

I understand the idea behind non-alcoholic beer, beer does have a good taste. But, spirits barely have any noticeable taste, you drink it to get drunk quickly not to savor it.

Scotch has very noticable and (IMO) delicious flavors. I don’t understand vodka connoisseurs, but they exist and there are such things as vodka tastings.

[Tenebras]

@Rick

I still don’t know if this is a good idea for someone that has had issues with alcohol.

Actually, the thirteenth step is home distillation.

[Cluricaun]

@Suburban Plankton

if you remove that you have to replace it with something…so what would it be?

Heroin.

[Qadgop_the_Mercotan]

thanks for the input, gang. i was just interested in seeing if there was such a product. i’ve no interest in trying it personally, as truly i believe NA beer is for non-alcoholics.

but i’m not surprised someone somewhere invented NA hard liquor.

on the oregon coast now, near tillamook head. gotta go watch the sunset and eat some more seafood…

[susan]

Enjoy the Oregon Coast. Catch the vibe of me working one mountain range over tonight.

I wish I could find a sherry substitute–I make some great dishes that really benefit from sherry, but have too many folks around who can’t have alcohol even in their food.

[N.Sane]

I drink the occasional glass of NA wine, because of my faith. And if I’m using wine in cooking, I use the NA type. I loathe beer, but my husband drinks NA beer because he likes it. I don’t know if others of my faith feel comfortable with that, but we are. And if I could find NA rum, I might at least give it a try. It’s the flavours I like, not the bite of the alcohol.

Just my two cents’ worth.

[Bill_Door]

I always figured that non-alcohol beer was like french kissing your sister. Even if it tasted exactly the same, what would be the point?

[Walker_in_Eternity]

@Qadgop the Mercotan

We’ve got NA beer, along with de-alcoholized wine and champagne.

So where’s my No Alcohol single malt scotch?

I want my NAphroaig!

My NAbsolut!

Could it be made? Is it? If not, think there’s a market for it?

Why would you want such a thing. Part of the joy of strong liquor is the burn felt when imbibing. Anything without alcohol would most likely lack that certain something. It may be possible to simulate it, but I couldn’t see the point really.

[Mama_Zappa]

Hard to imagine alcohol-free whiskey or whatever - a lot of the experience is surely from the complex molecules which are dissolved in / carried by the alcohol itself, which would be lost if the alcohol were replaced with, say, water.

I suppose one could attempt to replace the ethanol with another alcohol - which would presumably eliminate the caloric concerns or drunkenness… but then there are those pesky side effects - there are, I assume, more fun ways to die and I’m certain there are more fun ways to go blind!

[pulykamell]

@Tijuana_Golds

But, spirits barely have any noticeable taste, you drink it to get drunk quickly not to savor it.

Say what? The buzz is a nice side-affect to drinking spirits, but I tend to drink spirits because I love the flavor, not only to get buzzed. Scotch is just one example, but all whiskey for me fit this category. As does tequila. Give me a nice Patron or Don Julio or Herradura and I’m going to sip and savor it, not shoot it. The only spirit your quote above resonates with me at all is with vodka. But there’s at least two vodkas I like for their taste: Zubrowka (a Polish vodka flavored with a particular kind of grass) and Russian/Ukrainian hot pepper and honey vodka.

[MrBelding]

Pretty sure that’s not possible because of what the beverage is actually made up of. i wouldn’t be sure it would taste good either. Might be downright sickening.

[VinylTurnip]

I do have a line on some non-psychoactive marijuana, if you’re interested—curly or flat-leaf. $20 an eighth, only because I like you.

[villa]

@Tijuana_Golds

I understand the idea behind non-alcoholic beer, beer does have a good taste. But, spirits barely have any noticeable taste, you drink it to get drunk quickly not to savor it.

I’ll remember that next time I am slamming a few shots of Armagnac with my cigar.

[ShelliBean]

@DianaG

And vodka? It doesn’t taste like anything!

I beg to differ, woman. I once drank 3 vodka martinis before I noticed I was accidentally grabbing the hurricane lamp instead of the bottle of cheap vodka to make them. And it tasted exactly the same. So there.

[mhendo]

@TheLoadedDog

Claytons

That’s the first thing that came to mind when i saw the thread title.

Interestingly, in Australia the Claytons name attained some status in popular culture, and was (is?) used to describe something ersatz or fake, or something that does not live up to expectations. For example, if you go on vacation but end up working every day, you might tell your colleagues that you had a “Claytons holiday.”

The slogan for Claytons was “The drink you have when you’re not having a drink.”