And I pictured this.
Vet: I’m sorry there’s no more I can do. It’s time to put your dog down
OP: but we havent tried magnets! Or chanting! We could pray!
Vet: don’t be facetious, none of that does any good. You need to understand, your dog is going to die soon.
OP: ARROGANT. HEARTLESS. Sobs!
He called HER facetious - she said something that made him think she was (in appropriately) joking. She was offended at the implication she was joking. Ergo, woo or religion was involved.
No, he said HE was being facetious.
Hm. You are correct. I read that wrong.
See, I file this under “It’s not funny to tell people they are fired as a joke.”
When I was a young, new manager who had zero management training or experience, I once made a joke to an employee, “yuk, yuk, yeah, you’re fired.” It was immediately not funny and I apologized at once. I saw the look on his face, “Oh, shit, is she joking or should I go clean out my desk?” I realized that I wouldn’t think it was funny if a boss made that joke to me and I never did it to another employee. While some people might think something like that is a big hoot, chances are, you’ll say that sort of thing to someone who doesn’t and they’ll get upset about it.
Now, I can joke about my own employment situation all day long. Do not fuck with me on my animals. I just put down the last of five pets – just a couple months ago. I am down to one young, healthy pet. I would not find a flippant, “Oh, she’s got fleas; let’s just put her down” the least bit funny. And I would make myself a “difficult patient” because of it.
Fortunately for all of us, my vets are highly professional and while they all have great senses of humor, they don’t make jokes like this and then blame their patients for getting upset.
My dog was dying of congestive heart failure and the vet called me “selfish” for wanting to put her to sleep immediately rather than subject her to $500 worth of tests and then medication which might prolong her life “…for a few days, a few weeks, or a few months.”
I wasn’t going to “maintain” my dog. You can’t fix congestive heart failure. I wanted her suffering to end NOW, peacefully, with me at her side. And I was called “selfish.”
I’m sorry for all y’all who have such jerky vets.
I just put my cat down a couple months ago. He had hyperthyroid and kidney disease. He was seeing the vet every 12 weeks or so, and at the last visit, the vet found a mass. So I dropped a whopping $500 on an ultrasound (for a cat!) at a specialist vet. Specialist vet tried to talk me into surgery and treatments, chemo, radiation, etc. (The mass was a malignant tumor in his belly.) Meanwhile, I’d watched my formerly 15-pound cat drop to about 7 pounds. So, while considering all this expensive treatment, I asked what Kitty’s prognosis would be if I agreed to surgery.
“Oh, with tumors like this, cats can live 3-6 months.”
“With surgery?”
“Right, with surgery.”
I called my regular vet and reviewed the pathology report with him. He asked what I wanted to do. I said I wanted to spoil him rotten for a couple weeks and then say goodbye. Not only was I not about to invest thousands of dollars on a dying cat, but I knew recovery would be tough on him, he was losing weight too fast, and in the end, I’d still have a dead cat, only I’d be a lot poorer. No thanks. I’m not putting my little guy through all that. For what?
My awesome vet said, “Okay, then, I think that’s a good decision. Spoil him good and call me when you’re ready to do it.” And he cried with me while we did it. He’s an amazing vet. I would change docs if I got anything less than loving compassion out of the staff there.
I long ago took doctors off the proverbial pedestal. Not to generalize (but I will), too many just go by the book, don’t take personal situations into consideration, you’re just another number, and are arrogant beyond belief. Many are driven by the drug companies/profits and are too quick to put you on the latest drug fad.
And although you have to be your own advocate, they absolutely hate when you show even a sliver of intelligence about your own case. This could be construed as being “difficult”. But who is going to care more than you?
And whatever you do, NEVER mention Google! This is the kiss of death and will get you at best a polite chuckle, at worst you will be flagged as too knowledgable for our own good. They don’t like your kind…
A few months ago my psychiatrist angrily chided me (well I think he was angry…this guy reminds me of an old-school Doctor Who villain in his emotionlessness) about being five minutes late to an appointment. He said I was unstable in my punctuality. “Well you did say I was bipolar!” I shot back. He mused about upping my meds…
Dr. Frood: Ve haff vays uff making you punctual.
Years ago I was injured in a workplace accident. I lost consciousness and had repeated syncope episodes in the days and weeks after the accident.
I was stuck in worker’s compensation hell. I had no choice of doctors. The insurer’s nurse case manager effectively controlled access to medical care and moved me through a series of more than a dozen doctors, all the while cancelling diagnostic tests.
At one point the latest doctor managing my care said to go home and come back for a follow up in one month. It was around Christmas so I went to visit my sister.
Meanwhile the nurse case manager scheduled an appointment with a new doctor and didn’t bother to tell me or my attorney. I missed that appointment and the worker’s comp insurer cut me off.
Eventually I went to my primary care doctor (paid out of my pocket, for the time being) who set me up with a 48 hour Holter Monitor. The doctor - not his admin staff - called me with the results and informed me I was going for an emergency consult with a cardiologist that afternoon. Seems that heart rates below 20bpm were likely contributing to my loss of consciousness.
At the worker’s comp settlement hearing the the insurer submitted that I was a difficult patient and uncooperative. The appeal’s officer reviewed the medical records from my cardiologist and remarked to the insurer’s lawyer, “Counsel, what is wrong with your client?”
Maybe self-advocacy = difficult patient?
“Or I could see a different doctor…”
My podiatrist is probably going to at least think that I’m a difficult patient later on today…we’re trying to find an antibiotic that is effective and that I’m not allergic to.
Anyone who would joke about something like that shouldn’t be practicing, period. :mad:
If you come back, CJ9903, I would be interested to hear exactly what the vet said to make you upset - in what way was he being facetious? If he joked about putting your dog to sleep, that is indeed inappropriate. What, in his opinion, was your dog’s prognosis?
What is it about doctors not wanting to prescribe allergy tests? I had the same problem trying to convince my doctor to not just write another prescription but actually try and find out what I was allergic to - and this was in the UK. He caved in on the 3rd time of asking and, as a result, I was diagnosed with asthma and got some proper medication!
I wasn’t fired from the practice though. In fact I have’t heard of that happening to anyone - maybe the NHS doesn’t approve of such practice.
My sister and I were my paternal grandmother’s caregivers for the last five years of her life. She had numerous serious health conditions including COPD, horrible rheumatoid arthritis and several related illnesses.
At one point, about 18 months before she diied in Feb 2012, she dropped from her usual 92lbs down to 76lbs because she was’t eating or drinking and became very anermic and dehydrated. I felt totally helpless and asked her doctor to directly admit her to the hospital so we could avoid the E/R hassle because she was so weak. He asked me to bring her to his office the following morning and they would work her in first thing and he would then admit her to the hospital.
We were there before they opened and I went in to wait for them to call us and left Nana in my car with my sister with the heat and seat heater on. After two hours, his office staff still hadn’t “worked us in” and didn’t seem to understand what that actually meant. Finally, I LOST IT! I walked back to the area where the exam rooms were located and loudly announced “Dr. Kessler, this is (my name) and I need to speak with you please!”
One of the bitches who worked in the office reached out to grab my arm and I told her if she touched me, she’d be swallowing her teeth! The Dr. came out immediately and profusely apologized that we had not been brought in when we arrived! He came out to the car and, when he saw how sick she was, he called the hospital and advised them we were on the way and to please admit her as a Critically Ill patient.
I didn’t really mean to do this, but when I put my car in Reverse, I floored it and smoked the rear tires making a scene in the parking lot. But I was madder than Hell and hurrying to the hospital…
After that, everyone at his office and at the hospital were eerily polite and attentive to me anytime I brought her in! I later learned that they had flagged her file with a note that read something like “Grandson is VERY difficult and can get violently angry…don’t piss him off!”
In the words of Sharon Osbourne, “They can fuck with me, I don’t give a shit! But NOT my family!” :dubious:
Now you’re just being difficult.
Doctor’s notes: Patient is reactive. Avoids responsibilities. Runs from conflict.
New doctor: Now, if you’ll just sign this release for your records we can get started.
I saw a Dr at a practice group for what might have been a small kidney stone. He wanted to run me through the new machine that they’d just bought, but I didn’t want to loose another day of work. So, I asked him what he would do if the test was positive. He said he’d have me start with a lot of fluids for two weeks to see if it resolved. So, I told him that I’d try the fluids and if it was still bothering me, I’d make an appointment for their fancy new machine. He told me never to come back again. And that was perfectly fine with me.
From what I’ve seen, doctors rarely “fire” patients unless they have threatened staff, are blatantly non-compliant, or refuse to pay their bills.
And then again, sometimes they’re just butts.