This evening I went to the Red Cross for my apheresis appointment. I’m a regular donor both of whole blood and platelets, and was looking forward to getting closer to the five gallon mark. I know the staff, the staff knows me, I get free cookies, it’s all good.
The Good: During the pre-donation screening, we found that my blood pressure is down to 120/76 from last time’s 122/90. Go team!
The Bad: The return needle wasn’t positioned properly, yet I felt no pain or sting beyond the initial insertion. As a result, the centrifuged blood that was returned to my arm wasn’t quite returned to a vein, but rather straight through a vein and into the arm itself. Red blood cells, white blood cells, plasma, but no platelets, nope indeed. Those were off to the collection bag.
The Ugly: My arm began to swell, unnoticed by me as I was covered by a blanket and everything felt fine. About a half hour in, the tech came to check on me and her eyes grew just a little wide. She called over the supervisor, while I wiggled my fingers to ensure that I hadn’t lost my arm.
Her eyes grew just a little wider and ordered the tech to pull the needle immediately. I wiggled my fingers a little more to ensure I hadn’t imagined them wiggling, as at that point I had no idea what may have gone wrong, and I became concerned that I hallucinated the previous wiggle.
I soon saw that my skin around the return needle had swelled and distended to nearly an inch high. The needle was pulled, ice was applied, I sat in the canteen and drank juice for half an hour with an icepack strapped to my left arm.
The result? Swelling which should go down in a few days, but a bruise which should appear and stretch from my elbow to nearly my wrist, and last for four to eight weeks.
Which, y’know, is just super, considering I get married in seven and a half weeks. They recommended I wear a long-sleeved tuxedo for the ceremony, and to keep it on for the honeymoon.
And, uh, Elenfair? They, uh, said that I can’t do any heavy lifting or housework for eight weeks. Honest. I’m sure you can take care of it, sweetie; I have faith in you.
But I have no faith in my faithless left arm, whose sneaky veins caused this entire tragedy.
Stupid arm.