All these threads about religion and groups proselytizing has got me thinking about something. This past weekend, I was in a store shopping for clothes when a young woman came up to me.
“Are you interested in learning about the female images of god talked about in the bible?” She asks.
I’d heard the start of this same spiel before, about three months ago on a college campus. I declined hearing more because 1) I’m a contended atheist and 2) I’m out shopping, leave me along, goshdarnit!
But now I wonder what group she was associated with and what she was going to try to sell me on. Anyone experience something similar?
You should have turned around and, wearing your best maniacal grin, enthusiastically said, “Great!! You’re a neo-pagan as well? Wonderful! I’ve been reading all about female images in the bible and other places. Did you know that 6000 years ago most societies worshipped a female goddess? And that the female images in the bible are the last remnants of this female-centred worship, as the rest was purged my militaristic male societies between two and four thousand years ago???”
Woah, so I don’t know what group that is, but a friend of mine was visited by a group with what sounds like a similar belief system. There were two of them, a guy and a girl, and came knocking on his door. He let them in 'cause he thought the fellow was attractive (yeah, my friend’s kind of a sucker for a good-looking guy, even if they want to proselytize).
They started out with discussing the “feminine images of God in the Bible” as well and apparently went on to explain their take on communion.
My friend, like myself, is a liberal Christian in the UCC, which has no issue and even encourages gender-inclusive language concerning God, so the whole “God’s both a dude and a chick” business didn’t really seem particularly controversial to him. But I guess they had a weird take on communion and transubstantiation and the conversation got a little bizarre, so my friend remembered he had something better to do and bid them goodbye.
Knowing my interest in different Christian denominations, he asked me if I knew what group these two folks belonged to, but I haven’t heard of any specific sect of Christianity with the theology they seemed to espouse. If anyone knows, I’d be curious.
My friend lives in San Jose, CA, btw, so it looks like this group, if it’s the same group, must be pretty national to get all the way over to NYC.
She was wearing a sweater set. Do witches wear sweater sets? Isn’t that against their fundamental rules: “Do what you will but harm none” and “Avoid sweater sets at all costs.”
I think the entire conversation went like this:
Not Witch: “Are you interested in learning about the female images of god talked about in the bible?”
Me: “No thanks, I’m an atheist.”
NW: “Oh, I’m sorry! Were you raised that way?”
Me: “Nope. I’m leaving now.”
I can never think how to turn these conversations around when I actually find myself involved in them.
In college I did a lot of research on religions of all kinds, trying to find what worked for me. I finally settled on agnostic paganism, which fits me well. I researched lots of things, including wicca and other witchy religions and I have to say that they didn’t really use the bible in their religions at all. There was no mention of sweater sets but mostly the ones I knew stuck to tank tops and swishy skirts.
I have no idea what religion the Not Witch was trying to convert you to, but you are right that she probably was not a witch.
I’m not sure if the female images of god are more prevalent in one Christian sect. Perhaps this was just one of several ‘pitches’ the recruiters had available to them (I know in New York they like to use the ‘Are you an actor?’ line on hipster teens and 20-somethings before telling them about their church, which is apparently full of actors and celebrities. And it’s not even the Church of Scientology. As if.)
See, I’m gonna need your phone number. So that next time I am approached by random weirdos, I can just call you and hand the cell phone over. You can be my Official Voice of Spontaneous Witticism.
