I will say I was annoyed at my last job when the monthly department money was used for a Trump party on Inauguration Day rather than my birthday which also is in January.
I was even prepared to not ask for my favorite Thai restaurant for my birthday lunch since I knew one of the loud Trumpers didn’t like that weird food
I know some people who talk about their birthday week, especially for milestone birthdays like 40. But all it means is that they celebrate on multiple days. They certainly don’t expect presents every day! Most of them don’t even expect presents at all from anyone other than maybe their partner and parents. And there’s no expectation of special treatment even on the birthday itself, let alone the whole week. It’s just a fun thing.
Yeah really. I was going to say that
I celebrate my “birthday weekend”. Basically I relax all weekend and eat the food I like and do the things I want to do, on Labor Day weekend (birthday September 3rd).
I’ve seen it in the form of allowing people with busy schedules to celebrate your birthday with you around the actual day, but not necessarily on it. Not in big party format, but perhaps buy you a drink or meal or get you something. Also there is the weekendization of birthdays where it is moved to the closest convenient weekend day.
“Allowing people … to celebrate your birthday” reeks of self-important entitlement.
Like others, I will joke about my “birthday month” or “birthday week” but that’s about it.
Today happens to be my birthday (49). I had dinner with friends on Saturday, and today I’m celebrating by taking the day off work (and having lunch/dinner delivered). I’m not normally one to take my birthday off, but this year it made for a
3-day weekend so I figured “why not.” My boss knows it’s my birthday, and she let it slip to the other managers during Friday’s tagup, but no one else at work knows – not even my direct report. I don’t mind if people know/find out, but I’ll never go out of my way about it.
This morning I had a decision to make regarding making my birthday public on Facebook. It always has been, and I’ll admit I enjoy seeing the birthday wishes from friends on my timeline. But in July I took a short break from Facebook, and before I “left” I deleted or hid all of the personal information on my profile. I only spent a few weeks away, and this morning I realized that I’d never made any of it visible to friends again. I had a bit of an internal struggle between wanting to see the birthday wishes and feeling like an attention whore…the attention whore won. 
(Also I love posting Earth, Wind and Fire’s “September” on my birthday, and I figured if I was going to mention my bday in a post I may as well make the info visible!)
Happy belated birthday! 
I felt like “people who have asked to help you celebrate” was implied.
Nah, I’m good with once every four years, and would be better if everyone would drop that one, too…I’d rather just be left alone, it’s just another day, but have to “celebrate” it with the family to keep them happy 
Not allowing them seems worse.
Back before my company changed management and they slashed my vacation time by a third, I would take my whole birthday week off. However that wasn’t about about making everybody celebrate/worship me for a week, that was about sitting on my butt in blissful solitude.
I like a birthday party as well as the next guy, particularly since I’m the sort of person who sees an appropriate gift as a sign that somebody cares about me enough to go through the minimal steps to figure out what I want. (Pro tip: I provide a wish list. Use it!) However this doesn’t extend to wanting, or wanting to attend, parties seven days in a row. And if somebody wanted me to provide seven gifts (or otherwise do more regarding these parties than simply attending) that would rapidly escalate from “ha ha, no” to “ha ha, fuck you.” I’m a semi-nice guy, but there are limits.
Don’t even do ‘Birthdays’ around my place.
I’ve heard people refer to their “birthday week” but not with the expectation that people have to spend the whole week celebrating, to say nothing of doing whatever the birthday boy/girl wants. It’s more in the context of “I’m not actually throwing myself a party; instead I’m going to enjoy a couple little treats, like a mani/pedi on the day of, a drink with a friend the next night, and a nice dinner out with my partner the following weekend.” I see nothing wrong with that.
Or, I see it in the context of acknowledging belated birthday wishes, like “hey, it’s still my birthday week!” My aunt always sends me a card for my birthday, but never gets it out on time; I usually get it between a week and a month after my birthday. She’s always apologetic, and I always laugh and tell her my birthday’s not over until I’ve opened all the cards.
I celebrate the 12 days of Birthday (just like I celebrate the 12 days of all the other holidays: the 12 days of Thanksgiving, the 12 days of Fourth of July…). But the purpose is the same as the 12 days of Christmas: greeting cards are not technically “late” if they arrive within that time period.
Thanks! You said it during my birthday month, so it’s okay 
And happy birthday to you!
I am so completely sick of this. We have touched a nerve here.
Ms. Napier has gradually ramped up the expectations. First I had to take her birthday off as a vacation day from work. Then I had to take off a different day if her birthday fell on a weekend, so I was still spending a vacation day on her, which is when I started pushing back.
Then she’s taking off the whole week (which is fine) and expecting me to take it off too (which is not), and probably doing whatever she wants us to do (which is also not).
Then she started expecting to take a trip somewhere for her birthday, first day trips then overnight then over multiple nights, and then she started expecting more family members to go along, and flock around her for days while she holds court.
For her 60th she expected a group of 8 to spend three days and two nights at her favorite vacation spot a couple hours away, a location nobody else likes. She came up with a list of 18 things she expected to happen, like attending a parade, going on a ghost walk, having a photographer take a group photo, visiting a wax museum, and so forth. When anybody pushes back she gets hostile and angry and loud.
I am so sick to death of going through this fight every November, I wish I could just go live someplace else for the month.
For my birthday, if one or two family members wanted to take me out to dinner, that would be nice, as would a couple presents – but I actually view both of those as optional, gifts that are kind favors rather than something deserved, and certainly not something expected, let alone demanded and fought over.
If somebody wants to do something themselves around their birthday, fine. But expecting others to serve them over extended periods is just dickish and spoiled.
My daughter and I typically have a birthday weekend, only because my birthday is the day before hers. The family usually has a small celebration for me and a small celebration for her and we might have a birthday party for her with her friends. I’m fine not having a celebration, but the kids want me to have one, mostly because that means they get cake three times instead of “only” twice.
Wow, this is not normal behavior at all. I don’t even know want to say except therapy
Wow, @Napier, is she self-centered in other ways? Or is this new behavior focused on the birthday thing?
That’s crazy, Napier.
My FIL expected us (his children) to plan and execute a 60th birthday party for him - with 60 guests. I had to explain to him what a pandemic is.
Agreed. I’m sorry, Napier. This isn’t a birthday week thing, it’s a your GF thing.
The 60th birthday should be special - it’s a shame nobody wants to do the things she wants to. None of them are outlandish in themselves, but you can’t force friendship on people.