Are people naturally assholes?

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

Ok, hear me out, lol. As some of you know, I work in an office now, which my job is to call people on calling lists, and do “customer service surveys”. Not trying to get anyone to buy anything, no presuring, nothing like that. It is STRICTLY doing surveys on stuff like politics, shopping, or whatever. Some are ok with it, they work with me, and they play along, but the MAJORITY are just f*cking assholes. Hell, don’t get me wrong, when someone calls me, I usually piss around with them, and I’m even acting like an asshole for the most part, so no, I’m not just talking about other people.

What is the big deal about asking someone to do a survey? If they don’t want to, why can’t people just say that they don’t want to, and let that be it? Is it human nature to just be a pissy ass bitch all of the time when whatever it is comes into your life and disrupts you?

Besides that sht, it also seems to me that people crave horrible things. Yes, 9/11 was horrible, one of the worst ever, but back when that happened it was almost like some people LIKED that event. I suppose you could call these people the “extreme assholes”. Why do some people seemingly WANT bad things to happen? No, this type of asshole, I am not. But it seems that MANY just want the world to turn into a sht hole, and it just doesn’t make sense to me, at all. So, back to my original question…

…do you think that human beings, people, whatever, are naturally assholes in certain ways?

Sincerely,
Brent Lumkin

2

I don’t think there is a big deal about asking someone to do a survey.

But a lot of people, myself included, would get rather annoyed at someone using an approach akin to telemarketing to do it.

3

Nope. Most people aren’t assholes usually. Many people get immediately defensive at cold calls as they tend to feel intrusive.

4

I know what you mean. I do not like people calling me either with stuff like that, but I respect them. I don’t just go off bitching at them. I understand that they are simply doing a job for which they get paid, meaning no harm, and they are just doing their part to earn a buck. I just don’t understand why the majority, and I’ve learned that it is the majority, are just total assholes about it.

5

For me answering the phone usually interrupts something I’m doing that I wouldn’t mind being taken away from if its a friend or family member calling. But someone I don’t know calling and asking me questions about something I couldn’t care less about taking me away from something I was enjoying pisses me off no end. I have 2 daughters the get phone calls all the time, add to the the telemarketers and the “Surveys” and that makes 8-10 calls a night. By about the 4th call thats yanked me away from the Rocket lab or my current battle in EverQuest the “Phone Drone” on the other end is gonna get a short pissy response. I wouldn’t have a problem with surveys if the number of cold calls was something like 1 a week, but we’re getting close to 50! Sorry BrentLumkin, but just doing your job invades my personal time.

Ad astra!
VP

6

I make it a point to be polite to telemarketers, whatever they are asking or selling. But I’m very quick to hang up, because I am sick to death of these callers doing everything they can to keep me on the line, when I have already clearly and politely told them I am not interested. They cajole and threaten and argue and insinuate. I don’t have to listen to that. This is my home; I didn’t ask for the intrusion. So if my saying, “no, I’m not interested but thanks for calling CLICK” is being an asshole, so be it. It’s my home.

On the other hand, I have heard stories of people stringing telemarketers (and even door-to-door people) along, listening to their spiel, only to make fun of them when they have no intention of buying.

FWIW, Brent, if a caller tells me he’s doing a survey and can explain what the information is to be used for and who’s paying to have it collected – AND guarantee I’m not going to end up on some mailing list – I will answer the questions. I’m always sort of bummed when it turns out to be a media survey, since I’m always disqualified.

7

I know this is just anecdotal evidence, but…
I am.

8

Is this a survey?

9

I believe,deeply and firmly, that humans are inherently self-centered assholes, and that goodness and empathy are something we teach them. In other words, assholes are not created because someone warps a perfectly good kid, but rather because someone fails to warp a normal one in the wight direction.

10

I’m sorry, but many telemarketers make it impossible to be polite. They are actually making a science out of being annoying. Here are some of the tactics I object to:

  • Deliberately calling at dinner time (6:30-7:30)
  • Repeatedly calling until someone answers the phone, always hanging up without leaving a message if the machine is reached.
  • Conversely, repeatedly leaving messages. (If someone doesn’t call you back, it means they don’t want to talk to you).
  • Misrepresenting the purpose of the call.
  • Delivering a pre-written spiel without pause so as not to give me a chance to interrupt.
  • Not taking “no” for an answer.
  • Lying about the commitment involved (“this survey will only take a minute”, “just a couple quick questions”, etc.)

A lot of these tactics are the modern-day equivalent of the travelling salesman putting his foot in the door. I used to try to come up with a polite excuse, such as “I’m sorry, but I’m very busy”. But that would usually be met with “Well, what would be a good time to call you back?”. Take a hint, people! Telemarketers have forced me to be blunt.

For awhile, I was getting several calls a day from mortgage companies and home-improvement retailers, and I don’t own a home. My phone company had printed my number in a “reverse directory” (listed by address) without my permission. My number was then sold on some sort of calling list, so even after I had the phone company take me off the reverse-directory, my number was already in circulation. The only way I know this is because the callers would always ask to speak to my landlord (same address as mine, but different number), and mispronounce his name, which has an unusual spelling. When I asked callers how they got my number, I would generally get a stupid non-response like, “It’s on the computer”. Although I am usually polite to these people, I refuse to be courteous to someone if they cannot extend the same courtesy to me. One call went something like this:

Telemarketer: Is Mr. [mispronunciation of my landlords name] there?
Me: Are you a salesman?
Telemarketer: [in a snotty voice] That wasn’t the question. The question WAS, is Mr. [landlord] there?
Me: F*** you.
Telemarketer: Why you punk, I’ll kick your ass!

I mean, what is this guy thinking? He’s gonna cold call someone at home, be evasive and rude, and then make a sale? I was taught that you should identify yourself when you are calling. Withholding your identity to try to trick someone into talking to you doesn’t play with me. Sorry, but if you cold call me and get rude, you are going to be cussed at.

Anyway - back to the OP: If people are brusque with you on the phone, it’s because we are all weary of the constant barrage of unsolicited calls at home when we are trying to relax. I understand that you aren’t selling anything, but it’s still an unsolicited call. Now, you may very well be very ethical and never resort to any of the tactics listed above, so let’s just say that others have ruined it for you with their bad behaviour. Because of the numerous bad experiences I’ve had in the past, I now immediately say “No, thank you” - click. I think it’s a good response: It’s to the point, and it doesn’t waste anyone’s time.

11

To answer the direct question of the OP, though (and leaving the topic of telemarketers altogether), I heard a story on NPR this morning that gives you faith that people are indeed not assholes fundamentally.

The town of North Platte, Neb., did an incredible thing during World War II. Each soldier-carrying train which passed through – often stopping for just a 10-minute refuel – was greeted warmly by townspeople. The soldiers were given prepared chicken sandwiches, Life magazines, Bibles and other food and drink. Some even got popcorn balls, made by women from all over the area. In the center of each one was the name and address of a young lady from the area he could write to while away at war.

It is estimated that during the war, the people of North Platte greeted 6 million soldiers. They never missed a train. They used their own money, and the donations of other townspeople near by, who contributed goods on a rotating basis.

If you’d like to hear this truly heartwarming story, go to the NPR web site. The interview is with Bob Greene, the author of a book about the phenonmenon called Once Upon a Town.

12

Yes. The average person is an asshole.

13

Here’s my theory (and I hope to get a Nobel prize in armchair psychology for it):

People don’t like to say “No”. When we’re kids we’re taught that we should be generous and help people out. So it’s not so simple to just say, “No, I don’t want to take a survey.” We feel like we should make an excuse or apologize or… we can blame someone else!

Yeah, that’s the ticket! If we decide that you had no right to ask the favor in the first place, we don’t have to feel guilty about saying no. You bastard! How dare you?

Irrational guilt, transformed into hostility.

14

Why don’t you first tell us why you act like an asshole on the phone?

15

maybe you should put his in the BBQ pit!

Anywayz i have to agree; I tend to be pretty rude towards the survey telephones…

Jedi Online

16

You’re sitting at home, engaged in your favorite activity, whether that be watching T.V., reading, playing a game, chatting with friends or family, or hanging out on the SDMB, or whatever else you’re into, when suddenly the phone rings. Now your game, or your train of thought, or the scene you were watching has been interrupted. You’re mildly irritated, but still curious to know which of your many admirers has decided that he can’t live another second without hearing the lilting sound of your voice. So you make your way to the telephone, only to find out that you have been interrupted by an uninvited intruder who only wants to pick your brain for his own (and his employer’s) benefit. Now that little bit of irritation turns into full-blown annoyance. And if it’s the second or third time it’s happened this evening, or the activity in which you were engaged was particularly enjoyable, or you’ve lost your train of thought or your highest score ever, then, even if you are normally the most polite and gentle of people, you might be just a tad bit of an asshole to the person on the other end of the line.

Does this mean that people are naturally assholes? Of course not. It means that people naturally respond defensively to an intrusion into their personal time and space.

17

I agree with Manda Jo 100%.

18

I’m a strong subscriber to operant conditioning - rewards and punishments. In a nutshell, it pays to be an asshole in most cases (there’s a reward).

19

Because I work at home, and when you call, you interrupt what I’m doing and make me get paint all over the place and I thought you might be my SO calling me as a surprise then you aren’t. :mad: