Exactly.
Instead of “don’t be a dick 101,” how about “don’t be a pussy 101.” Bending over backwards to avoid offending people who choose to get their panties in a bunch over the slightest little thing just breeds generations of easily offended wusses. And leads to all manner of infringement on free speech in the name of political correctness.
By the by, did anyone else notice that the guy who wrote the article referenced in the OP is the same dude that wrong the movie “John Dies At The End”? Funny guy.
Infringement on a god-given right to be a self-centered dick? Okay, but who benefits and in what way? How is it any different than any other way of looking out for other people’s feelings? Or is that being a pussy too?
That article is awful.
The general rule is don’t be a twat, but on the other hand don’t get too caught up with what other people think. I say this from experience of both being a twat and being someone who cared far too much about what other people think. At the end of the day neither being completely insensitive to others or hyper-sensitive to others are particularly fruitful ways to live. I.e. there’s something called balance, which is harder to do than being insensitive/hypersensitive, but ultimately is more rewarding.
And if you told a story about defecating in your car during sex and people avoid you, 99 times out of 100 it is because you told a story about defecating in your car during sex.
The article is a pretty factual look at actual human psychology. On what basis do you call it “awful”?
You’ve offended me and now I hate you
The problem here is, that I live in MY bizarro world like that – MINE, MINE DO YOU UNDERSTAND??? – Not in the OTHER GUY’s bizarro world like that. I’M THE ONE, not the other guy, who’s always entitled, deserving, virtuous, &c and more wronged, not the OTHER guy!
This is just plain old General Relativity, people! In symmetrically passive-aggressive space-time-personality frame, each participant’s 
is indistinguishable from the other participant’s :mad: , appearing to outside observers uniformly as :rolleyes: or, should the relevant wave functions fail to collapse, :smack: .
Anyway, the best passion-aggression, raised to a high art form, is a wonder to behold! Preferably from a distance of course.
Okay, if you really have no interest in understanding the human mind, then so be it.
I think this is funny demonstration of the whole frakkin point of the article, but I guess you be serious. It wouldn’t be the first time I was totally misreading.
Anywho, I like David Wong’s style, and I enjoyed the article. I see that stuff happening all the time, especially when I worked in an environment where people making quite varied amounts of money worked closely together. The girl with two kids barely paying her trailer note because her husband got laid off last year and won’t work ‘below his level’ is usually conveniently busy when the 3 vacations a use girl shows the Italian vacation video on her brand new Mac.
I don’t think he’s trying to tell us we should stop behaving like this. I think he’s saying people are complicated and also some other stuff that I don’t feel like explaining because if you don’t get it from the article then my explanation won’t help.
Do whatever you like without regard for the consequences; just don’t be too surprised when there are indeed consequences. Sometimes it’s easier to just not be a dick and not have to deal with consequences.
The best part of the article was “hell-shitting cockhitler”.
That’s sexist, and arguably so is using “dick” as a pejorative. Your free speech is only violated when there is prior restraint enforced by the state, or legal consequences afterward. Usually, those who complain about “political correctness” are those of (often unexamined) privilege, who resent being called out on their prejudices. Do you want daily life to be even more filled with bigotry than it is already? It used to be even worse, and for some, such as the transgendered, it’s as bad as ever.
For what it’s worth, I myself bristle at the inclusion of religion in all of this, because unlike so many other attributes, religion is a choice, and one that has consequences.
The article goes way beyond don’t be a dick, more into be a psychic territory. Because in some cases the power imbalance or privileged whatever is not even known, you put a picture of your kid on your desk and make the secretly infertile boss hate you.
I don’t know how you prevent that aside from being a psychic.
The article tremors to explain certain characteristics about people. What makes you think it’s trying to tell you to read people’s minds?
I’m not sure what you’re saying here, or did you mean to type tries?
I’m saying that there is no way to apply empathy if you don’t know something.
No, grude is exactly right here. We should all have consideration for how we affect other people. No argument. But we cannot be held responsible for or prevent every little imagined slight.
Look, it’s one thing if I know you’re a struggling single parent who can barely pay the rent, and then I go out of my way to bring my new golf clubs into the office and mention how I’ll be taking them to Hawaii next week in my private jet on my date with a supermodel and isn’t it a shame that you’re eating Top Ramen for lunch again, because I spent $100 for lunch at the country club today. That’s being a dick. It’s wrong and we all know it. I might claim innocence, but I’d be lying.
But if I want to share some information about my life in a factual manner with no ill intent and you secretly hate me because my life is better than yours… in that scenario, you’re the dick.
In fact, if it actually escalates to hate (as the article says) and you haven’t had a frank conversation with me about how my behavior affects you, then you have some serious problems that go beyond merely being a dick.
I think we all benefit from living in a world where our own happiness is dependent on ourselves (choosing not to be pussies) rather than on other people’s behavior (choosing not to be dicks).
If Person A is only happy when Persons B through Z choose not to be a dick, he is not likely to be happy very often. But if person A is happy when he himself chooses not to be a pussy, he will be happy all the time. At least, happy in the sense of not being offended.
I’m not saying you *should *be a dick. Just that people are better off when they take responsibility for their own outrage.
Yeah, I guess the ideal is finding a balance between not being a dick on purpose and not letting other people’s baggage affect you.
This article on XOJane.com made me think of this thread. http://m.xojane.com/it-happened-to-me/it-happened-to-me-there-are-no-black-people-in-my-yoga-classes-and-im-uncomfortable-with-it
In short, the author of this piece imagines that a new member of her yoga class must hate her because the author is “skinny and white” and the new member is not. Why XOJane found this fit to publish is beyond me. But the author’s insecurity and paranoia certainly takes things to a new level.