Are there different tipping practices for different races?

In My Humble Opinion
41

[Slight hijack]

The waiters that have responded here seem to think that they should be tipped for doing an average job. I see a tip as a bonus for doing a good job - and I haven’t hesitated to remove the service charge if the waiters don’t do a good job; equally I’ve added to the service charge when they’ve done a really good job - so please explain where I’ve gone wrong. I feel that that the waiter depends upon his tips should be an incentive for good performance on his or her, not an incentive for the customer to tip. BTW I have also given tips specifying that it should go to the chef.

42

A close friend of mine bartends in NYC at a few different places. She’s mentioned that although hip-hop nights are just as well-attended differently- or non-themed nights & the age of the clientele is pretty consistent with the other nights, she always seems to come up very short when counting her tips up after working a hip-hop party.

Perhaps it’s because she seems out of place (She’s got an understated goth look going on: large upper-arm tattoo, glowingly pale skin, black bob, black eyeliner) & the clients can’t relate to her as well, even though she’s friendly. Perhaps it’s just those bars. Who knows? We both thought it was weirdly interesting.

FYI: She said that her Asian clientele generally tip pretty well.

shrug

43

Whoops. The third line of the first paragraph should read, “…just as well-attended as differently- or non-themed nights…”.

Previewing: It’s not just for other Dopers anymore.

44

The first time I visited the US I had to find out before I left NZ how tipping worked – the advice at the time was 15% if they had a table cloth and 10% without. :slight_smile: It was a bit odd and annoying at first – but I found that writing “+15%” on the bottom of the bill when the credit card when back for swiping seemed to be easy enough, I got to see the amount before signing… and no one complained. (Is doing that fairly normal?)

However, even after a number of trips to the US and Canada now, and having lived and worked in both I still can’t get used to a) leaving cash money (including a tip) on a table to settle a bill – I’d always find someone to give it to, or wait till they came to clear the table, and b) tipping even when the service was bad. Yes, I know the wait staff live off the tips, but the idea that you’d tip (as little as 10%) when the service had been bad, and the waitress (in one particularly memorable case) had been borderline rude, was just too much of a cultural leap. Sorry. :slight_smile:

I imagine that sometimes the Kiwis and Ozzies do simply forget the tip – a Kiwi friend and I had a great time in a German restaurant in Milwaukee, and had an excellent waiter, who very, very, diplomatically asked my friend (who was paying for the meal) if there had been a problem with the service as he’d had forgotten to tip. I recall said friend rather guiltily added on a 25% tip (to what had been a reasonably expensive meal) so things worked out OK in the end.

45

You raise a good point, and something I’ve always found problematic - whenever I get bad service, I generally cut the tip, but the server would practically have to burn my food and drop it on me for me to leave no tip at all!

I guess it comes from having a mom who was a waitress. On the other hand, I’ve noticed over the past couple of years that the servers in our local establishments are getting terrible! Slow service, bad attitude, it’s getting hard to ever leave the standard 15%.

46

In addition to my earlier statments I would also like to add that;

I’m reminded of one of the sayings of Dr. M.L.King “If a man(person) is called to be a street sweeper, he should strive to be the best street sweeper there ever was”. I assume that people in general, especially those in the food service industry constantly try to be as professional and inviting as possible given the fact that they must perform this very personal service for complete strangers!!!
If I hadn’t mentioned before that I was black would you assume that I am? Or/and that I would leave generous gratitudity?Perhaphs I’ve not been exposed enough to why certain races would tip better than others. There have been MANY valid points made here that I’ve never considered (and I certainly will).
Still, regardless of race, creed or color, It all boils down to RESPECT. Respect for them to us and visa versa.

47

As a bartender (ex waitress) here in downtown San Antonio (mainly tourists) I’ve pretty much waited on everyone by now. :smiley:

Women do not generally tip as well as men, *unless[i/] they’ve been in the business or know someone who is/was. They just don’t. Period. I’ve had some women make my night, tip wise, but those women aren’t very common.

And yes, black people do have a reputation for not tipping particularly well; I’ve found this to be true more as a waitress than a bartender. One of my best tips ever was from a black gentleman who was from Philly; he made my night.

Asians…haven’t waited on enough to have any opinion.

Hispanic people are generally good tippers, in my experience, but Mexican nationals are among the world’s worst tippers. When I was waitressing, we’d fight over who had to take them unless there were enough of them to grat.

Young people and old people don’t tip as well as those in the 30/50 age group. Young people because they’re usually broke and don’t know any better, and old people because they haven’t updated the percentage to match inflation. (Back in their day, a good tip could jingle; a great many still believe this. And I can’t, in all honesty, think of a single person over 65 who’s ever given me a memorable tip. Nicest people in the world, but they just don’t tip!)

Secretaries and teachers are among the world’s worst tippers, on average. So are people from non-tipping cultures, like Europe, India, etc…and as a bartender at a tourist bar, I can tell you in all honesty that the only time they tip worth beans is when there’s an American with them who tells them to.

Uncle Sam is also a very bad tipper. :smiley: People who eat/drink on his tab are usually ten-percenters if you’re lucky. Ugh.

And finally, people tip the bartender better than they tip the waiter. Don’t really know why; I think it has something to do with the fact that the bartender controls the situation, while the server doesn’t, at least in peoples’ minds. People are also generally nicer to me behind a bar than they ever were at a table.

And everyone will inevitably surprise you, for good and bad, so I try my best not to let any assumptions on my part color my service in any way. Better to blame them for being awful tippers than to wonder if I earned the crappy tip they left me.

48

This is wonderful - I so wish it was the case. I always considered myself to be an above-average waitress (after 15 years, if you’re not good, you’re not good on purpose.) The job has its drawbacks, mainly in that people tend to look down on service people. INCLUDING service people themselves.

Ya know, it’s not brain surgery. BUT - it is very possible to be an excellent food server. There’s a shortage of good service people, because people think it’s an easy job, that anyone can do it. The job therefore attracts people who want an easy workday. For every decent food server I trained, there were at least 15 who were only working there because they didn’t have the skills or ambition to do anything else.

I take a lot of pride in my service skills, and that was always reflected in my income and in my repeat customers. I’ve said for years that I should hire myself out to restaurant managers as a consultant. If you are in the food service industry and you rely on tips for the bulk of your income, it seems obvious to me that you are working for your customer and not for your management staff. When servers start to realize this, and recognize that they are earning a commission and not a gift, is when service across the boards will improve…and so will tips!

49

As I mentioned earlier, my fiancée’s parents are old-school Korean/Japanese. In both cultures, when you give someone money, traditionally, you never do it so the amount can be seen. It is always enclosed in an envelope. To have bills openly placed on the table would just be… wrong.

I have a friend who is a millionaire who’s lived in Japan most of his life. He told me a story about how one time, he left a tip on the table and the resturant staff came running out after him, telling him he forgot his money.

However, I haven’t been to Japan or Korea and this practice might have changed or might be different for foreigners. Still, I did a quick search on google for tipping guides for Japan, and most say not to tip, because it is already included. And when you do tip, for bellhops and such, always put it in an envelope. However, most Japanese understand that you are gaijin and won’t be offended if you don’t have the money in an envelope.

http://www.icaap7.jp/data/information.html

http://travel.yahoo.com/p/travelguide/519740

50

Only once have I not tipped.

Tiny Chinese restaurant in NYC. The food was awful, and cold - not “just warm,” but COLD. I sent it back, took one bite, and it was still cold. Nowadays, I’d have refused to pay, but my companion liked her food well enough, so I did pay for my meal (what a dingus…), but refused to tip. The waiter literally chased me out the door, saying, “Why you no tip!!!” I told him it was the worst food I had ever had and walked away. I suppose it’s not the waiter’s fault, but the cook’s fault, but damn, at least make sure that the cook fucking microwaves it when I send it back as too cold!

hrh

51

How can you tell that a patron is a teacher? Do they make it a point of telling you what they do, or do you ask people their profession?

52

I was a server for several years in college, at a number of different restaurants. Here are my observations:

Low income blacks (the hip-hop crowd from the OP): no tip. None. I expected no tip, I still provided my usual high level of service and attention, I got no tip.

Working-class (blue collar) blacks: Excellent tippers!
Working-class (blue collar) whites: Excellent tippers!

Japanese: very low tippers
Chinese: Good tippers, similar to middle-class whites
(I could distinguish between the 2 groups by language)

Upper class women: Lousy tippers. This goes for most of them, but not all. But usually the husband earns all the money and the wife does not feel she has the right to “give” it away.

Church people: Never more than 15%, no matter how good the service is. The older the person is, the lower the percentage.

Old people: If you get 10%, consider yourself lucky. They probably think you are an excellent server.

Drunk people paying in cash: Best tippers ever!! (based on my experience - I once got a $120 tip on a $250 bill)

My tipping strategy is this: unless the server TOTALLY blows it, they get 15%. If the service is better than average, they get 20%. If the service is exceptional, they get 25%. If they make two major gaffs (no refill for 10 minutes, food is wrong, wait is much too long with no explanation/compensation, etc) then they get 50 cents. I leave 50 cents because I want them to know that I didn’t just forget to tip and I am not just a cheapskate leaving the spare change in my pocket. I want them to know that I am intentionally giving them a terrible tip. Sometimes I’ll even ask for change for a dollar. :smiley:

53

Socioeconomically speaking, old money don’t tip worth a damn. New money does, especially very new money. My dad made all his money himself, he tips extravagantly. I tip well. My debutante friends in high school, who mostly had plenty of cash to spread around and usually ate most of the meal… well, many times I’ve snuck back to the table in shame and embarassment to leave a few more dollars. My blue collar friends in the same social set say the same things - they tip much better than their richer friends.

In my experience, college students often tip fairly well, considering, because most of them have worked some sort of service job.

And a hijack - I suppose most wait…people, I guess, these days, never really got educated on proper restaurant etiquette. And I’ve brought this up to waiter friends and they’ve said that no, it’s not rude, it’s polite. But I stand firm, it’s rude to ask if I want change. If I paid cash, I will leave your tip on the table. Don’t worry, I won’t forget. It’s rude, crude, and unhousebroken to pretty much ask me if I’m going to tip you and how much. Especially if the bill is $9.56 and I hand you a $20. I only tip that well at my favorite Thai restaurant, which I’m always afraid is going to run out of business. Possibly because they keep giving us free food. Maybe that’s because we tip them so well? :slight_smile:

54

They would tell me. Usually as they were arguing about the bill.

I once returned change to a group of teachers - they had ordered several large appetizer platters to share, and the bill was 19.90. They gave me $20 and told me to keep the change because they did not know how to divide a dime into eleven portions. Honest to God. These teachers also insisted that they would not run a bar tab, but rather pay for their drinks individually. This means that I got to figure out change for eleven people every single time I went to their table. I kept a running total on the side (as mentioned by other servers, I was taxed on my assumed tips) so I could keep track. When they left, after taking up a table in my lunch station for three hours (during which time I could have seated 6 other parties at those tables) their total bar bill was $165. My total tip? One dime. After pleading with my manager, I was able to get their total taken off my day’s sales ticket; the house ate the tax for me.

And that was one of the BEST experiences I had with teachers.

Agreed and agreed. The ONLY proper way is to take the payment, tell the customer “I will be right back with your change,” and GET RIGHT BACK WITH THE CHANGE. If, as you are hurrying away, the customer calls after you, “No, keep the change,” you stop in your tracks, turn around and look at the customer, and very politely say “Thank you so much. Have a lovely evening (day, afternoon, weekend.)”

55

Cannot disagree, based on my limited anecdotal experience. My wife was born in Mexico and we frequent more than a few “authentic” Mexican restaurants in the area. Most cater to Hispanics but won’t turn away adventuresome others, of course.

Almost without fail, a large group of Hispanics who have ordered many alcoholic drinks, (expensive) appetizers, entreés and maybe even dessert will leave two or three dollar bills.

The first time I went to dinner with my wife, her cousin and her friend we racked up a $100.00 tab easily and when I left a twenty on the table I thought her cousin’s eyes were going to pop out of her head.

Methinks in this case among the lower class, not-accustomed-to US-practices crowd, tipping is looked upon as a necessary evil, kind of like the mindset of dropping a buck in the collection at church on Sunday.

56

I have no experience in this, except for three sons that have waited tables. Sometime last year my oldest son was talking to one of his younger brothers and mentioned that black people were bad tippers. I discounted his story and still have no basis to believe it. However, last summer, I was having a late breakfast and the only other people in the restaurant were three blacks; a man and two women. All of a sudden one of the women exclaimed rather loudly “Remember, when we used to steal tips?” It amazed me that she would say such a thing, so everyone could hear her.

Not long after that my wife came home and told about going to a cafeteria and how this black waiter had been so nice that she left him a good tip. As she was paying she looked across the room and saw a black woman pick up the tip and put it in her purse. Since this is only two instances it isn’t enough to make any assumptions about it being racial, but is it common for tips to be stolen?

:confused: [sup]Both instances happened in Memphis, so maybe it was the same woman.[/sup]

57

Several years ago I got a nice stock option check and took a few of my friends out for dinner on short notice. We went to a relatively nice restaurant, and though we weren’t violating any dress codes we weren’t very dressed up. One of my friends and his wife were pretty obviously not accustomed to more upscale restaurants, and the four of us were all rather loud and goofing off. I figured our poor waitress didn’t expect much of a tip from us, so when we got our check (app. $120, I did say relatively nice), I paid with two hundreds and told her to keep the change. Heard a very loud ‘Thank you!’ as we left. Feels pretty good to be a good tipper.

I usually tip 20% for decent service, more for really good service, but a 66% tip was unusual for me.

58

Kinz, IMHO it is not common for your tips to be stolen by other guests. Had I been your wife, I would have called that woman out to her face. Sometimes you get a fellow worker that will be dishonest and take your tip. But if they get caught that is grounds for immediate termination. That is why it is a good idea to leave the tip in the little black book they give you. It is harder to take the whole book and hide it than money that will easily slip in your pocket. Same goes for credit card slips. Leave those in the book too. It’s private and you don’t have to worry about your credit card number being out in the open. If you are at a place that doesn’t use the black books, then it is always a good idea to hand credit card slip and tip directly too the server.