Are you a cheap tipper?

In My Humble Opinion
61

I worked as a waitress, was good at it, so understand how hard that work can be. Hence, I’ve always tipped well, at least 20%; rare are the times it was less, due to abyssmal service. Same ol’ story said here; in my regular places, always treated very well due to tip history, well, and general politeness.

Some folks just don’t get it, though. One meal with my aunt’s husband, in California, a large group, with kids, taking up the table for a good while. He was a vice-president at Universal Studios, so had plenty of income, but when tip-time came, he was stingy as hell. His excuse: “If they had the brains for me to notice them and give them money, they wouldn’t be working here.” We were all horrified, and tipped extra to make up for it. Thanks Be that idiot is no longer in our family.

I do think, though, that a lot of folks don’t realize that servers often aren’t paid minimum wage, and don’t know about tip out to other staff. If they knew the basic way servers are paid, they’d tip better. Should be taught in high school, as an economic lesson IMHO.

62

I’ll tip 15% for average, service, but this move to 20% is silly. 20% is for unusually good service. Bad service gets less than 15%, but it’s got to be bad. Average service is 15% rounded up to the next dollar.

However, I think you also have to imvoke the Coffee And a Muffin Rule; if it’s a small bill the top must be high. A $3.32 bill, I leave $5. That’s a 50% tip but IMO it’s a bit chintzy to count pennies at that level.

63

That’s interesting. Way back about 16 years ago, I was waitressing at an interim job at a local beer and burger joint. A woman and her family came in. About 10 to 12 people all together.

She and her husband were impossible to please, they loudly complained about each and every thing that occurred during their stay. The beer they’d ordered was no longer available in the take home mugs, so I’d brought the smaller version so that they didn’t have to wait for their drinks (the bar was in another part of the building). If they’d decided they didn’t want those, no biggie they wouldn’t have had to pay, and could have chosen something else, but at least in bringing them, they had their drinks with everyone else.

“Did I TELL YOU to decide FOR me???” the husband demands loudly? The bun on one of their hamburgers (homemade buns) was shaped oddly, and the wife INSISTED that it had had someone’s hand or thumb smashed into it. I said I’d take it back and have them make another one. But that wasn’t good enough, the fact that it had a dent in it (most of the homemade buns were not symetrical or perfectly rounded on top) was some sort of personal affront to her. Apparently I was expected to invent a time machine, go back in time and make sure it never happened in the first place. Anything less was a direct insult to her.

I immediately offered to fix each and everything they griped about, and their “do you KNOW who WE ARE?” attitude just got worse and worse.

The wife haughtily declared “I work at ‘The Office Place’ (a bar), so I KNOW what I’m talking about”! Not one thing I did made them happy though I bent over backward to try and please them, and I know I was a really good server as normally I had happy and high tipping customers.

After about 30 minutes of their hostile crap I went and got the manager and he took over at their table (this place was very unusual in that they did back up their servers). Their attitude was so loud and hostile, that every single one of my other customers at the surrounding tables were clucking and shaking their heads. (I forgot to mention I was 7 months pregnant at the time).

At at every other table besides Mr. and Mrs Hostility, I got double the tip I would normally have gotten. And no less than two of my other tables made it clear it was to make up for what the evil table was putting me through.

The thing I remember most though, and feel the worst about was the kids who were with Mr. and Mrs Hostility. They were obviously embarrassed by their parents behaviour. Well the ones that were the kids of the Hostilities that is, some were likely those kids’ friends or possibly cousins or some such. Anyway, they were the WORST and they, and people like them, are the main reason I would never consider a career in food service.

And more importantly, why I tip extremely well today.

64

When I was young I started out as a busboy/dishwasher, and worked my way up to waiter. I figured 15% was good enough in my day, it’s good enough now! Then I read this and posted it in another thread we had on tipping:

So I’m ok with tipping 20% now, because that $10 hamburger & beer should probably cost $30 by now, yet it doesn’t. Your server’s rent & tuition definitely have kept up with inflation, though.

65

I gotta say, I’m relieved to hear the opinions of most people on this board, because I honestly thought the world had gone crazy.

Still, often after dining with family of friends, I’ve given a 20-25% tip, for example, $8 or $10 on a $40 bill, and the people I’m dining with have reacted with surprise. “You’re leaving THAT MUCH?”

To which I always respond, “It’s only a few dollars more than a regular tip. It’s only four dollars, but it will make that waiter’s day.”

And trust me, it does.

66

I don’t understand why restaurants don’t just raise servers’ salaries to a decent rate, raise the price of the meal, and quit with tipping. That way, no one gets stiffed, and diners don’t have to feel like they’re subsidizing payroll.

Or does that make too much sense? Maybe that’s another thread for another day…

67

Quick question - while obviously meals that are brought to me while I’m sitting down at a restaurant should be tipped - what about take-out orders?

Do those sales/figures get reported to the IRS?

68

FairyChatMom: Because restaurants save money by not paying us full price, and even if some restaurants raised the prices of meals, the public would react with disgust at how expensive it is, and go to a place that hadn’t raised their prices. It would be a lot easier if things could go that way, but greedy restaurant owners, as well as customers who didn’t understand the purpose of the price hike, would never allow it.

Amarinth: In my experience, take-out sales do indeed count among a server’s total sales. As a result, I am still tipping out 4% on every single take-out order, even though I’m rarely tipped on them.

As a server, while I’m not serving the meal, I am taking the order, packaging it up, and hunting down and wrapping up utensils and napkins and the like. So I appreciate fifty cents or a buck tip, or really even a quarter, as long as it pays for the tip-out.

I’ve worked in places where servers refuse to do take-out orders, too. Not only because we pay tip-out for the privelege of packing up take-out food, but also because of how often people don’t bother showing up to collect their food, which becomes a void on my record, or, in some places, means I have to pay for the entire order.

69

First off, Carlyjay , welcome to the Straight Dope! Hope you consider a membership here.

(Don’t worry, my sales pitch is done.) :slight_smile:

As noted by other posters, people who have worked in the service industry or know of those in the service industry generally tip more than those who don’t. For disclaimer’s sake, I consider myself in the latter group.

I’ve been known to follow the recommendations in San Francisco guidebooks, which include tipping 20% at a restaurant. Granted, the restaurants in guidebooks tend to be clustered next to the swanky hotels, but unless service is horrible, I never tip below 15% for dinner…

(Side note: I usually tip 10% for lunch, unless it’s one of those ultra fancy joints. Then it’s 15%. The 10% rule doesn’t apply if the bill is less than $10; in that case it’s always at least a dollar.)

…which brings us to the next topic. I’ve always calculated tip using the amount after tax. It wasn’t until I spent more time with younger friends and outside visitors that the thought of tipping before tax even occured to me. Yes, we’ve fought about it.

These days, I don’t bother arguing: if I’m covering the entire bill or my share, I’ll put in my post-tax tip. If someone else is paying, I’ll politely ask if I can throw in a couple of other bucks or sneak in the money after everyone’s headed for the door.

(If the tip’s too small and I’m unable to do any of the above, I’ll slink away and won’t eat with those people at that location again. Thank Og, this hasn’t happened yet.)

Unfortunately, Carlyjay’s predicament happens at too many places. I know some places that serve great food but employ distateful tip disbursement policies. This happens a lot at small restaurants. The manager keeps an eye on all the servers because all tips must be collected for redistribution (and management gets a cut) at the end of the day.

I hate this practice. Not all servers are equally competent, and if I give a good tip to a server, I want that particular server to get all of it. We’ve been known to sneak money in wrapped napkins to servers when the manager looks the other way. True, some places divide the money among everyone, including dishwashers and busboys, who I think deserve something nice. However, all this does is turn tips into subsidies, encouraging employers to never pay anything above minimum wage to their workers. (By the way, does anyone know of places that pay below minimum wage?)

Even at these places, I’ll still tip accordingly. Many of these hole-in-the-walls are in ethnic enclaves frequented by locals who don’t tip (it’s not a traditional practice in these cultures). I’m not rich, but my salary allows me a comfortable living, so I don’t mind tipping. I strongly agree with the OP: “It’s only a few dollars more than a regular tip. It’s only four dollars, but it will make that waiter’s day.”

As my father once told me, if you can’t afford the tip, don’t bother getting the meal. Assuming the server did a decent job, I wouldn’t be able to look him or her in the eye if I didn’t leave a proper tip.

Tipping is such a controversial topic that I’ve had huge disagreements with friends and loved ones over it. I hope my post doesn’t get me thrown in the Pit. :slight_smile:

Anyway, enough rambling. Just my 15% of $1.33 worth.

70

I’m going to second this opinion. Around here, I know that these servers are making at least $10 an hour due to the hot job market, so I’m not beating myself up over not tipping 20% for crappy service. My baseline is 10% for meh service, and I go up for anything above and beyond. (Unfortunatly, a rare thing in my town)

71

tipping also varies by region…

fromZagat’s 2006 survey :

“On the question of tipping, the results present a clear contrast between residents of the East and West Coasts. Restaurant-goers in Philadelphia (19.2%), Atlanta (19.1%) and Boston (18.9%) are the nation’s most generous tippers, while diners in Seattle (18%), Los Angeles and San Francisco (both at 18.3) turn out to be the worst. Nationwide, the average tip has been going up over the last several years from 18% in 2000 to 18.7% today.”

72

It’s almost always 20% for a meal, regardless of where or what kind of meal. And it’s always on the total (I must admit I never thought about tipping on the pre-tax amount).

If I have a coupon or a gift card (uncommon, but it does happen), it’s still a 20% tip on the total bill.

I will decrease the tip to less than 20% for bad service, but almost never less than 15%. I once left a penny under the coffee cup (for a waiter who was a complete boor); I disputed a “required” gratuity for another waiter (who was incompetant and attitude laden to boot). But those are rare examples.

It’s a dollar a drink at a bar, plus leftover loose change.

It’s interesting how no one has mentioned other tipping behavior. For example, housekeeping leaves an envelope on the last day. Nothing special - they come in, clean, make the bed. What do people tip there, if anything?

73

Wait a minute, the meal prices go up with inflation, therefore the amount (not percentage) automatically goes up if the tip percent is the same. It’s already adjusted for inflation.

I personally walk into a restaurant with a tip percentage in mind, usually 15%. If it’s a place where they don’t have to do much (like a salad bar place, where I help myself) it’s 10% or less. As the meal progresses, I either add to or decrease the tip.

I have to have really awful service or really bad food with no offer to make it right in order to leave no tip. DH and I recently went to our favorite Chinese place. We go there regularly, sometimes 2-3 times per week. They seated us, said the waitress would be right over. 20 minutes later (this was lunch, before they got busy) she breezed by, filled our glasses with water, took our orders. Finally got the food, it was good, waiting for our ticket (we both had to get back to work and usually can get in and out of this place at lunch time in half an hour). We waited another 15 minutes. I had to go GET a box for my “doggie bag”. We finally had to flag down a different server to request that he find our waitress and get our ticket. She blew us off. No apology, nothing.

I left no tip that day.

I used to wait tables. I don’t care how bad it gets, if you do a decent job, and are reasonable about problems in the kitchen etc. you should get about 15%. But it’s already adjusted for inflation.

74

You know, I didn’t even know that you were supposed to tip on the pre-coupon/discount amount until last weekend. My boyfriend and I went to half-price night at a place and I was going to leave a tip on what was on the bill, apparently that is wrong. It makes sense but I never really thought about it before. Now I know. Maybe other people don’t know this? I feel really bad about stiffing people all these years (I’m a bit of a coupon freak).

And seenidog, here’s a thread I made a long time ago about relative restaurant prices and tipping: Should we tip servers in expensive restaurants more than servers in cheaper ones? It convinced me to give a little more on the once-every-two-years occasion that I go to a nice restaurant. I still hate the tipping system though. I don’t care if my hamburger costs $6, I want it to be abolished.

75

You say this like it’s a terrible thing. (I may be misreading your tone, I admit.)

The “meticulous records” required are a daily tip log. How else would any tipped employee know how much to claim as income without keeping a daily tip log? When I waited tables, I kept a log that showed my total income in tips for the night, and noted the subtraction of the “tip out” we had to do for the service bar and the bus staff.

76

I regularly tip 20% of the total bill for any sort of service. I have friends who are pretty picky about tipping pre-tax. I don’t mind tipping in the least, but more and more I feel as if my tip is not tied to any sort of service expectation (in restaraunts anyway). So mostly I end up tiping 20% for mediocre service, which really bothers me. I tip well anyway so as not to appear cheap. The entitlement irritates me just the same.

On rare occasions I tip less. On rare occasions I have tipped more. Twice in my life I left no tip.

Tip jars really bother me. You don’t get a tip for taking my order, nor do you get a tip for making my coffee with an automated machine or getting me a hot dog.

A real barista gets a tip. My stylist gets a tip (every visit then a large one at the end of the year), my postman (once a year) the garbage man (same), my regular Fedex/UPS guys (around xmas). My housecleaner gets a very large tip at the end of the year (one I make sure she gets directly). I could probably go on and on.

77

As a server I can tell you that there is some truth to this, but if it’s half price night, that’s just cheaper, not a discount. Look at the bottom of your bill. If it has any amount subtracted from it (it will literally say “-13.99” or what have you), that’s something you should tip on. The reason for this is that the server still has to tip out 3-5% of the amount BEFORE your discount (it’s not fair, but it’s true). Say you didn’t like the linguine and so they subtract your $10 from a $50 bill, leaving $40 that you owe. Many people then leave $6, thinking they’ve left 15%, when the server’s actually tipping out a percentage on $50, so they’re actually getting a little over 10%, minus the tipout.

Now, if you go to a restaurant’s happy hour, normally they just have happy hour prices. Meaning it isn’t subtracted at the end; it’s just rung up that way to begin with, and that amount is all the server has to tip out on.

As for the OP, I’m as generous a tipper as I can afford to be. I always, always tip 20% at minimum for satisfactory service, but if I’ve got a little extra to spare, I like to let good waitstaff know they’re appreciated. It’s not uncommon for me to tip 30% or above, especially at places I go often. 15% and below (shudder!) is a special hell reserved for waiters who can’t even convince me they want to BE there, much less make my dining experience enjoyable.

I heard a good analogy once about tipping, and I’ve used it ever since. Tipping is like flushing a public toilet-- nobody’s forcing you to do it, but you’re kind of an asshole if you don’t. And tipping 10% is like flushing but leaving nasty piss puddles all over the seat.

78

Now’s the time we tell our son to get with a new catering/hospitality outfit!

I did the hospitality thing (bartending for conventions, weddings, conferences, etc.) for about 10 years (great way to meet women, by the way!), and I never had anyone near my tip jar unless it was someone working with me.

In fact, if some company flunky had asked for some of my jar, I’d have had him work for the next two hours. No-one touches a bartender’s tip jar.

-Cem

79

Can I ask you why you tip less at lunch? The server is still having to tip out and report the same amount of sales. I’ve never understood the “tip less at lunch” mentality. When I waited tables at lunch (which I always tried to avoid since the tips always sucked) I actually worked harder than at dinner, since people wanted to be in and out quicker. It never seemed fair that the average tip seemed to be smaller. It’s not like the server is working any less.

and THIS

is AWESOME. :smiley:

80

I think American restaurants should be required to pay decent wages to all their staff. I do not feel obliged to leave a 25% tip after eating a meal due to social custom.

I will not tip at all if the service is insulting or very poor. I tend to tip about 13-16% for basic service and will tip 20% or so for very good service. But I consider whatever level I tip at to be solely my perogative. I have worked lots of low wage, miserable jobs where no tip was expected. I don’t want to pay someone to be nice to me. If they do a wonderful job, I’ll often choose to give them a little extra. But this is my choice only. If they provide me with extra freebies or give me good service on a cheap meal or are clearly working their asses off, I’ll tip a higher percentage.

A bartender who makes me wait at the bar since I only tip a buck on the first drink is just a jerk. I refuse to tip just to get basic service. The whole custom strikes me as kind of silly. I don’t get emotional about it, but I’d rather staff merely had a higher minimum wage and that the custom reverted back to being more discretionary and less an expectation. The argument that “framilies should not go out to eat unless they are prepared to tip 20% and can afford that”, which I have heard in the past, strikes me as ludicrous.