I bunch, but I wouldn’t say I have any reason for the preference. I bunch because I have always bunched, that’s all.
Nonny
Folder. 8 squares, fold it twice. Lift the left cheek, wipe, fold it again, wipe again, check the paper. If it shows a lot of ‘soil’, grab another 4-6 sheets and wipe a third time. I rarely have to make a fourth pass but if I do I can fold and wipe again.
The problem with bunching is the logistics of the second and third wipe.
To paraphrase one of my posts in the thread mouthbreather linked to:
On the fold vs. bunch issue, I can’t fold my clothes properly when I do the laundry, I can’t fold my napkin properly when I finish eating. Why am I going to waste my time trying to fold something neatly if all I’m going to do is stick it in my ass?
Bunch.
I bunch most of it, then wrap the last bit around the bunch to make a smooth outer surface, then fold the whole thing over once to make it a convenient size. I thought everybody did it that way – you people are all freaks! :eek:
Male. Standing Folder. Reach behind, front to back.
I was also really astonished to see people perfomed this ritual sitting! The worse is yet to come: I found out about it in a video I received by e-mail with a spycam inside the toilet showing the process at lenght: a female urinating, defecating and wiping. OH MY GOD! SITTING?! THAT’S NEW! (even more TMI: I was also amused to see the elasticity of the vagina. And yes, grossed).
I’ve tried it and it just doesn’t work. No room whatsoever.
Standing I can:
- bask in all its glory
- proofread without risking smearing
- move my hand
- reach the TP without effort
- get good coverage (bending the knees a little)
- do more than one flush without rotating my torso.
If it’s really liquid I will wash it in the bidet. The disavantadge is that I usualy only leave my book when my blood flow is lacking and my legs get numb. And it tingles when I stand.
Did I mention I never take a dump without a book or preferably a newspaper, ever? It isn’t the same thing. After the dinner coffee and smoke, I am invaded by peacefulness in the toilet.
I bunched when I was little but one day my father witnessed and said “that’s not how its done”. And frankly he was absolutely right, it is weird (and expensive) to bunch the TP. Can’t get a good grip. I will start with two folds and keep folding until no more clean blocks are left.
And finally my secret: I finish up with a wet baby tissue. Clean AND fresh.
I’m a buncher too. I find that I’m used to the feel of the toilet paper when it’s bunched. Folded toilet paper feels so damn … smooth. It’s like there’s nothing there and that’s scary.
By the way, I also stand when wiping. It is easier to wipe when you stand if it is folded.
This seems like a good time to revive this topic. I like to take four squares and fold them twice into three layers.
Once when I was young I used too much toilet paper and caused the toilet to overflow. I didn’t know what to do so there was a big mess. My mom told me I was using too much toilet paper. Since then it had been my life’s mission to be an efficient user of toilet paper.
I do not want that to happen again.
A Zombie shitter?
Has no one in the last 16 years heard of a bidet?
Solves all the above problems
Standing wipers? How the hell do you wipe standing up? Or has the standing wiper died off in the last 15 years?
There’s a separate thread on standing v. sitting …
Without even clicking on the title, I just knew this was going to be about toilet paper.
I don’t think my landlord would approve of me replacing the facilities. And since my landlord is married to a friend of mine, the whole bidet thing would fall under “TMI LALALALALALALLALALALA!!!”
Also, if I didn’t have it set up to bring in warm water, it would be damned…enlivening…in the winter. Cold water here is COLD.
Folding, followed by a moistened wipe for #2.
Since the dead have risen ----- I have always thought (since the original article by Unca Cecil was published) that most men are folders and women bunchers. So maybe its time for a new thread, by someone much more motivated than myself, done as a poll?
I make origami cranes, so i guess that’s folding.
Huh, I make origami bulldozers. Preferences, I suppose. Speaking of preferences, did you know that 75% of the world population does not use toilet paper at all? I love the internet 
Is that better, or worse, than a phantom shitter?
You might be a redneck if you have a dog instead of a bidet.
Whoever neatly folds a small quantity of toilet paper and leaves it atop the dispenser in the bathroom I often use at work, this message:
I gather that you sometimes take too much off the roll and decide to be environmentally conscious and leave the excess for others. Just throw it out, no one else is going to use it.
Well sure, but there’s not always a rabbit around when you need one.
I had to go to the bathroom and go through the motions just to see how I did it. I pull of about 3ft of paper and then I loosely gather it from top to bottom in increments about 2 1/2 sheets long. So it is somewhat folded but loose and fluffy.