I really enjoy giving someone a gift that they really like, more than just the value it is worth. Likewise, I enjoy receiving a gift that has had careful thought put into it, even if it isn’t perfect - I’d rather have a gift that someone thought about but missed the mark, then just another shirt, even if I will wear it.
Which means that, as far as others go, I usually am not that interested in having a list - I’d like to pick something out. However, there are a few people in the family (my wife’s parents) who we never can come up with a good gift idea for. We don’t know what they want, they don’t have hobbies to appeal to, they are just hard to shop for. We’d like to have a list for them. Also, my wife’s sister has a new baby, and it’s good to see a list of what they need vs. what they have, just because we’re more than happy to fill in the empty spots there.
On receiving gifts, again, I’d rather they put some thought into it and bought something, and I’ll never be unhappy with someone who tried to get something special even if it isn’t something I want. I also don’t mind giving a list to a relative who is having trouble.
What I really hate, though, is when someone asks for a list, and you go to all the trouble of writing one out, with low priced items, higher, easy to find, hard to find, a nice variety, all things you would like, and - they ignore it completely. And get me a shirt. Well, fine, but don’t waste my time by asking me for a list, then. (It’s not the poor gift that upsets me, it’s the blatant disregard for the value of my time.)