I do, however, have lots of experience with people being related to people they would prefer to see dead. And that is NOT too much of an exaggeration.
It happens.
You’re welcome.
etv78, I wish you all the luck in the world. You’re taking a really big step, one that has the potential to change your life significantly. Just initiating contact with your birth family means you will know things you may have always wondered about.
I’m a birthmother and I reunited with my son 18 years ago. We have a great relationship and it’s the best thing that ever happened to me (next to giving birth to him).
My husband is also an adoptee who reunited with his birth family. Their relationship is not so good - some of them don’t get along very well. But I asked him not long ago if he ever regretted contacting his birth family, and he told me he was very glad he did it. For him it was about knowing, and even if the relationships are strained, he’s glad he knows his mother and her family. I think I would feel the same.
I guess everyone in your position has to ask themselves if the risk of rejection is worth the benefit to them, and just what that benefit IS. For you that may be just finding out where you got your green eyes or love of music, or it may be the ability to establish a relationship with people who are biologically related to you.
Read e-mail from parents. They had a then current address and phone #. Will call tonight or tomorrow, especially if campus is closed.
…not adopted…have a half sister, that I’ve met once…for me, biology means very little…it is the relationships that I encountered growing up and being in the same physical family that mean the most.
I highly doubt that I would be interested in finding my bio parents if I were adopted.
If your biggest desire is to show them that you turned out okay, do you expect or desire to have a continued relationship with them? Are you prepared if they don’t really care to have anything to do with you…or if their only interest in you is what you can do for them now?
I wish you all the best, then, and for a happy reunion for all, whether you chose to continue any sort of relationship or just be content with the contact.
Omar-Completely prepared for rejection. Whether we have an ongoing relationship, who knows. To me, these people are my Mother and Father, the people I’ve talked about in previous threads are my Mom and Dad. Huge difference IMO.
Just left message with organization who can help me find them.
Best of luck with your journey. Keep us posted. Interesting reading genuinely interested in the outcome (and fingers crossed it’s a good outcome, whatever that may be).
Will soon receive forms from the agency, which I’ll need to fill out and return.
How will you feel if it turns out your parents don’t want to see you? I wish you luck, but are you prepared for that scenario?
Yes, I have faced the possibility they will reject me.
I know what you mean. I’ve struggled with that for years. From what I know, my bio father never even knew my mom was pregnant. I’m sure it would be quite a shock to find out he had a nearly 40 year old son (40…it’s coming too fast!) Not to mention finding out that son was gay, an atheist, etc.
Good luck! My wife and I have the info the Firebug would need to track down his bio-mom, and I figure we’ll give it to him once he’s grown if he expresses an interest in finding her. But that’s still a ways off; right now he’s still learning to read. 
I know this is a very serious topic and an important moment in your life, but I have to admit, this sounds like the plot of a very funny film.
As a gay guy, I can only imagine all of the fun, laughs and good times that are about to ensue…
I truly wish you the best, but can’t wait to hear how this all turns out!
I hope it happens, but don’t hold out a lot of hope. Unlike the OP, I have very limited information. I’ve tried before but it’s hard to get anywhere with as little as I know about him. (sorry, not trying to steal focus from the OP!)
Just filled out form, waiving confidentiality. Could meet them as early as late summer.
It’s none of my business what you do and don’t tell the sprog - but as an adoptee myself I’d recommend that you tell the kid young about being adopted, and its just another meaningless factoid for him as a kid.
Don’t wait until he’s “old enough to understand” and then do the big reveal (I think that works about as well as the single “birds and bees” talk at age 18)
Like you, I am also approaching 40, athiest…not gay, but I do have two kids, so finding out you’re a grandad to “mixed” children might be a shock as well.
I found my bio mum back in 1994 or so…
Finally tracked down who I thought was bio dad at the end of last year - but he denies any relationship around that time
I agree with bengangmo. Tell him now, and a few months from now…just bring it up now and then because you don’t know when it will register but it’ll be a given, not a revelation.
**RTFirefly **didn’t say he hasn’t told Firebug that he’s adopted, he’s only said he hasn’t given him the information required to track his bio-mum. I would agree that level of detail can wait until the kid is older. I was given mine at 16 and I wouldn’t have coped well with the information when I was any younger.