I don’t know if you could keep her interested though. Unless of course you have a piece of yarn or a laser pointer.
Agreed. Although those chicks don’t need to use their looks to get ahead. This one might as well just get used to doing so.
This is all a hypothetical, seeing as how I could never land a girl that hot. All I have going for me is this boyish charm of mine, and trust me, it’s not anything to write home about.
…I do have access to chemlites. That could help me out.
Oh joy of joys! Even her superficial-beauty couldn’t save her! That was great.
As to answer the question, the first thing that popped into my head was “Because a 5th of americans are under the age of 7.” Yeh. I would’ve had the audience rolling in applause.
Well, she has a lot of pretty going for her. Wonder what her life has been like and what it’s going to be.
The Onion; there’s one for every occasion: “Area Woman To Get By On Looks For Six More Years”
Stranger
Despite her beauty, unless she gets a good dose of curiosity about the world around her that sparks some interest in learning, I’d say the odds are against her. Or, she’ll marry some rich guy who needs a trophy and have it made for a while while she nips, tucks, injects, implants, removes, folds, and sucks out her signs of aging.
For a minute there, I half expected them to pull out a map of the world to see if she was in the 1/5th, or 4/5ths category. I don’t think we would’ve been too surprised either way after that debacle.
It would’ve been better had she pointed out at nothing in particular, screamed “WHAT’S THAT?!” then bolted off stage.
I love The Onion
Well bless her heart.
I’ve often said, and heard said, that one of the biggest curses a girl can have when she’s growing up is if she’s extremely pretty. I don’t doubt it. I really do find that it’s sad.
I agree with you, though. I hope she realizes that people laughed at her, and not with her, and that it wasn’t because of her “nervous response”.
I don’t find her pretty at all. And her words just make it ten times worse.
I wouldn’t kick her out of bed for not being able to construct a complete sentence. Well, at least not for a half hour or so, then… yeah, I would.
I can just image someone back stage thinking “Ok, they went with the internationally themed question. Remember what we talked about. Mention South Africa and Iraq, works every time.”
If she only would have grabbed the mic back as she was getting cut off, and said “World peace!”, I might have wet myself laughing.
Dude, you’re NAMED after a map company! You’re in business, baby!
Sailboat
I actually found myself feeling sorry for this poor girl.
Okay, let me try:
“That was great. Now get out of my house.”
Seems pretty straightforward to me.
[wavy dream sequence]
Ms. South Carolina: “Oh! Yeh! That’s it! RIGHT THERE! GHA! AH! Unh! There! It! IS!! America! RIGHT THERE, UNDER CANADA! OH GOOOOOD!!!”
cmyk: Folds map, “Yup! She’s a keeper!”. Rips off his shirt to expose his washboard abs and sun-gilded chest then pounces into the sack…
[/wavy dream sequence]
She might or might not have a cute body — if someone would put her in jeans I could tell you — but the face scarcely makes it to “typical”. Not that I’m picky about appearances, but it’s kind of a stoopid face and goes only too well with what she said. The expressions, especially around the eyes, just shrieks “I have an IQ below the median on the short bus and down’s syndrome kids make fun of me behind my back”.
Wow.
See, I’d never do anything like that. For one thing, I’d want to show her off to my friends. “Ha, I am hitting this and you never will.” Secondly, no one would believe me unless I had her right there.
Why yes, yes I am that shallow.
Hahaha! Indeed, you would have swept the Q&A section of the competition.