Interviewed for a lateral move to a more interesting job. Sooo tired of what I know right now, I needed a change.
They gave it to the only other person who applied. Someone with half the time in the job as I have. Not to mention the mountains of material that I’ve created in the last 4 or 5 years. I’ve contributed 10x more useful stuff than she has. Oh, and I’m also a much better speaker.
And I don’t suppose I’ll ever know why. Goddamit. I really thought I saw a way out, now back to the fucking job search (which is always fruitless).
My father is dying. He has been for over a year- he has ALS. This sucks, of course, but over the past year and a half, I’ve adjusted.
The problem is, he absolutely does not want his sons to see him as ‘in need of help’. He’s in an electric wheelchair, and he doesn’t want us to see him in a light that allows us to help him. Fine. It’s not optimal, but I can deal with that.
Yesterday, however, we went out to eat. He decided that he’d use what little energy he has these days to walk to the bathroom instead of using his chair. After he was gone for a little bit, my mom asked me to go check on him, which I did. I found him in the stall, unable to fasten his pants.
I did it for him, but I knew, at that moment, he was hurt and humiliated beyond all measure. He wouldn’t talk for the rest of the meal. He was seriously torn-up, and from that, -I- felt torn up.
I have -no- problem with helping him. But I don’t want him to feel so hurt or angry over it. I know he’s not going to change this opinion… So, long story shorter? I feel like crap for having done something that needed to be done. I feel like absolute crap over it.
Part-the-second.
Goddamit, why did you have to decide to drop your job NOW?
My friend, we’ll call him Dan, holds down several jobs, one of which I’ve often joked I’d love to take over for him. In the past month, his work has gotten more and more active in very good, positive ways, and he’s decided to drop out of the job I’ve joked about.
The problem is, this is happening when I’ve just been cast in a new show, and volunteered to take on bookkeeping for a small organization. Couple this with the fact that, honestly? Right -now-, I’m not at all sure I could fill Dan’s shoes in the job. He’s confident I could, and is nudging me to go for it. If he’d dropped in another two months, when my show was over, I’d be fine with this. As things stand now? I don’t know if I could devote the time to the new job. Problem is, if I don’t grab it, someone else will. This is an opportunity I’ve wanted. Now if I could only squeeze 7 more hours into the day in order to have time for it…
You’re probably too good at what you’re doing now. I got stuck like that for a while until I told my boss I was getting so burnt out that my attitude was suffering, and pointed out that everyone I had trained to do the job was being allowed to move on to something else before they’d learned half of what I knew, and I really thought it was my turn. I know part of the reason I was stuck there for so long was he didn’t want to worry about someone else’s learning curve.
Your daughter should play with my cat. My husband is off in another state on internship interviews right now, so my normally incredibly needy kitty is about 5,000 times more needy than usual. I haven’t slept properly in four days. Keeping awake on the drive in this morning was rough. I tried to get him doing something active to wear him out before bed, but he wasn’t into it. He just wants to lay on top of me purring really loudly into my ear, and if I don’t let him do that, he meows constantly. Constantly.
**
flatlined**, chiming in to agree with the others. Just be honest and trust her to know what is best for her at this time. I’m terribly sorry to hear about this tragedy.
ArrMatey!, my sympathies are with you as well. It sounds like one of those things where talking about it might make your father feel even worse. But you are doing what you have to in order to take care of him - don’t beat yourself up about circumstances beyond your control.
You folks are all right. I didn’t think about it when we were talking. TBH, my wedding never even crossed my mind during the discussion. I called her today, but she was heading to the hospital, so I just gave her my love and good wishes. This isn’t a shock, considering what has been going on with his health, but its really sad.
Indyellen If you have a compounding pharmacy, they might be able to make it fish flavored. I know people who swear by this. And, if you are going to go to a pharmacy, ask your vet if there is a human drug that would work as well. Most human drugs were tested on cats. I was able to do that with several maintenance meds I was giving cats. It is much cheaper.
I tend to avoid liquids btw. Pills are easier IMO, mostly because if a cat spits out some of the liquid, I never know if I should give more.
Now, here’s how I do it with squirmy and/or unknown cats: If you have a leather or denim jacket, put it on and zip it up. My riding jacket is perfect for this.
I put my left hand under my victim’s chest, with my middle finger between his legs and my forefinger and 3rd finger on the outside. This gives you control of her front legs and she can’t bite your hand. Now lift her with your elbow on the outside of her body and pin her hips to your side. You want your arm pressed right where her legs start for the best control.
You have already her dose in the syringe, so grab it, press it between the back of her lips and let her have it. Not straight back, that could make her choke. Squirt it along the inside of her cheek.
She’s going to try to move her head away, but holding her like that gives you some control about how far she can move her head as well. If she is really squirmy, you can sit on the couch and kinda lean against the back so her head is pressed to your body.
Something that also helps with long time meds is liberal use of treats. I get the treats out and put them where kettah can see them and give them the treats as soon as they’ve had their meds. After a while, they come learn that if we get the bad thing over fast, they can have treats fast. Or not. They are cats, afterall.
(((ArrMatey))) I’m so sorry for everyone involved.
I have to keep figuratively biting my tongue to stop myself from posting that when I hear what sounds like a car alarm, I’d inwardly curse whoever the fuck installed and armed a car alarm in my neighborhood, and if I finally went outside at some point, whoever broke into a neighbor’s house would probably have been able to cart off the entire contents of the place in the amount of time that would have elapsed.
Sorry, but it’s true. Blame the assholes who set their car alarms so sensitive that trains rumbling past about a half block away (true story) or people passing by on the sidewalk (also true story) would set them off, for my complete lack of giving-a-fuck about hearing one now, except to mull over murderous thoughts aimed at the owners of said vehicles.
(Seriously, who actually looks outside when they hear a car alarm-like-sound?)
BAH! The tinnitus in my ears, which had subsided until it was almost unnoticeable over the last few years, has returned with a vengeance.
I just hope it’s because of the cold I’m fighting and that it will go away again once the cold clears up. I also hope I can sleep tonight. (For me, tinnitus is a very high-pitched tone that just goes on and on and on and on and on and on and on …)
These are the same people who re-post that awful “Through The Eyes Of a Rapist–READ AND SAVE A LIFE!!!” glurgey shit on Facebook, with shit like “Rapists look for women with long hair in braids or something they can grab easily!” or “They carry scissors to cut through your clothes fast!” or “Never park next to a van because most serial killers abduct their victims in vans!”
It makes them feel safer because They Took Precautions. By posting it.
Stepdaughter is informed that I am coming to get the cat and have it spayed. She “hasn’t seen it for a while” but she’ll keep an eye out for it. A couple of hours later, she calls up freaking out because she and the baby are being invited to leave their lodgings and have nowhere to go. Crap!
Today I am working on a plan to escape…I have a part time job I can work at 20 hours a week until at least June. And I was also putting off leaving here because of my health insurance, but apparently I can get a pretty decent policy for myself and the little guy for under $200. So what I save on day care, if I can pick up another little part time job to cover the insurance it looks like I can actually survive for a while as I job hunt and plan.
For your father and you. It’s really hard to confront any kind of mortality let alone the mortality of those close to you.