Awright, which of you bahstads did it?

I wandered down to the suburbs of Philly this weekend to visit the folks. On Saturday morning, I came downstairs to breakfast, only to discover that, in the middle of the night, someone had TP’ed the house and the trees.

There are no obvious suspects. This has happened before, back when we kids were in high school. But the youngest sibling (who is currently living at my parents’ house) is 23. Further, there aren’t any teenagers living in the neighborhood, and even if there were, my dad isn’t the “mean old man” type, deserving of a TPing.

My mom thinks that some kids just got the address wrong - there are about 3 roads in the immediate area that share the same name as my parents’ road, with a “W” or “E” or the like affixed.
Me, I think different. It was obviously Dopers!! So, come clean, and I’ll go easy on yas.

Sua

Well, we did do the nose…

It wasn’t me, I swear it wasn’t. I was um,er, ah at the movies yeah that’s it I was at the movies all night. No nobody saw me! I don’t remember the name of the movie because I got there late and missed the start. I don’t remember what the movie was about because I fell asleep. I lost my ticket stub but that’s where I was. You do believe me, don’t you ?

You kidding me? I’m constantly running low on butt tissues as it is. I’m not about to waste my precious resources trying to wipe your ash, or cover those sons of a birch.[sup]*[/sup]

Besides, if I did do that, what would I use? I don’t even have a newspaper subscription.

  • I’m truly, truly sorry for this sentence.

Something tells me that if I were within 100 yards of you this weekend, I would have had better things to do than TP the house. :wink: Plus, like Enderw24, I can’t afford toilet paper. I’d have had to make some out of leaves and berries.

if “go easy on yas” includes a back rub and a loan, I’ll happily confess.