For the sole purpose of crippling me with crushing headaches.
Since my husband got a new job (That offers insurance! The kids will be covered when I start working!! Sigh of relief) he’s gotten really into personal grooming, since this job is in an office rather than a gas station. He trucked off to the drugstore and came back with one of those AXE shower gel/body spray/deodorant kits. He’s been using the pomade stuff too, which for some reason just has to smell just like the spray crap, because god forbid your whole body isn’t soaked in olfactory stimulant.
And “stimulant” is the only word I can think of for it. Every time I smell the crap, or if I go into the bathroom anytime in the four hours after hubby exits it, I get nervous, jittery and headache-y. It’s a really strange response to a smell, so I wonder what the shit they put in that stuff. I hate it. I’m going back to the store and buying something more tolerable right after I chuck the AXE stuff and ban it from ever darkening this door again. Any suggestions?
This stuff must have the best marketing campaign in the world to convince anybody it’s responsible for anything but people running away from you in terror while covering their nose. WHY is this stuff so popular amongst young men? Hasn’t anyone noticed it’s rancid to the point of making you sick?
My husband and sons use the body washes, and sometimes the deodorant but I draw the line at the body spray. The body washes leave a nice scent but not too overpowering when used alone. The boys when they were young teens used the body spray the way I used hairspray in the 80s…that is to say that my initial reaction was usually, “are you sure you used only one can?”.
Here’s something that you can suggest that works for the men of my household. If you prefer a body spray, buy an empty plastic spray bottle and pour a bit of your favorite cologne into it. Fill it the rest of the rest of the way with distilled (or purified) water. Spray as much as you want and it will smell nice but leave not headache-inducing fogs of scent that follow you wherever you go.
Tell him the women in his office* called, collectively, all at once, on speakerphone, and demanded that you 86 the Axe. Mitchum makes both an unscented and a fragrance-free deodorant (yes, they are two different products; the unscented contains fragrance) and, if he feels he must wear fragrance, remind him that it is spring now and he doesn’t have to put it on with a crop duster as if he’s fumigating the cave. Bay rum is nice.
Well, that’s just your body’s reaction to you suppressing its natural need to claw at your husband and give him mind-blowing sex every time you smell it on him.
I used the kit a few years ago. Body wash and spray. My girl at the time loved the way I smelled. But then again, I didn’t really use a lot. Just a really quick shot of the spray was enough. Some of my friends liked to cake it on but I never thought of it as more than a waste of spray; I didn’t notice the overpowering smell. Maybe my sense of smell isn’t very good?
My roommate uses the body wash in our teeny tiny bathroom, and I don’t have an adverse reaction to it. I don’t think he uses any Axe spray…if he does spray himself with anything, he does it in his bedroom where I can’t smell it.
He’s hilariously obsessed with how he smells and looks, so I would think that if Axe body wash is enough for him, it’s enough for anyone.
Tell your husband to nix the spray for a bit, and see if you can at least stand the body wash.
Well, perhaps I was being a bit hyperbolic. I haven’t used it since I was in the 7th grade, and Wikipedia says it was “on sale in the United States and the United Kingdom during the 1960s through the 1980s.” I remember that it came with a set of karate instructions to fight women off. Back then at the parties I went to, the overpowering smell of it and Brut could knock a cow down.
I actually like the smell of some Axe, and Bod, and lots of other cheap stuff like that. But I learned quickly that no woman of my type did. And, since quite a lot of my friends are women, and I really want to smell good for others and not myself, I stopped.
My husband is the exact opposite. He never wears cologne or anything. He’s a chef and works in a kitchen and no matter what he puts on at the beginning of his shift, he smells like food and bleach by the end of it.
I love it when he wears cologne. But I don’t like that Axe stuff. He wears Tommy when he wears cologne. I do like it when he uses Old Spice body wash because then he’s got a clean, manly scent after the shower… he doesn’t stay clean for long if I have my way! He’s a dirty, dirty boy…