Dear all,
I have also sent this question to Uncle Cecil, but pelase let me have your opinios as well.
We live in a large joint family of 5 brothers and wife. One of the wives of the younger brothers had a new daughter. We all play with her a lot. she likes to be held, too. But, one when person, lets say Mrs. N, picks her up, she cries uncontrollably, till someone else holds her. Now, we dont what may be the problem, but this has been happening since the last 6 months… Tried everything and we are at our wit’s ends… Kindly enlighten us to what the cause might be.
Awaiting replies.
Ashwin
This is probably going to be moved to IMHO.
Babies are people. There are some people they just don’t like. Maybe Mrs. N is wearing perfume that bothers the baby, or maybe Mrs. N is picking her up in a way that’s uncomfortable.
Unless Mrs. N has to pick the baby up, don’t worry about it, and tell her not to take it personally.
Robin
Or the baby, being innocent, can sense evil.
Is this person experienced in handling babies? She may be nervous when she holds the baby resulting in quickened heartrate and/or respiration. Either can upset a baby. She may be holding the baby too tightly, or not securely enough, making the baby feel uncomfortable and/or threatened.
Odor is another consideration, and not just perfumes. Food odors, natural body odors - not necessarily offensive, but may be strange or strong enough to cause distress.
Appearance is also a factor. Does this person look different than the rest of you? Hair color, skin color, etc.? Does she wear glasses? A hair covering? Bright red lipstick? Anything that distorts facial features is a major turnoff for babies and children.
I don’t have any advice to add, but I have to note that despite my paucity of experience in handling babies, on the rare occasions that I am compelled/required to hold one they seem to go completely relax. One year when I went to Thanksgiving with an ex-girlfriend and her family, one of the 2 year old nieces wanted me to hold her infant sister before we left; this was a squalling, slightly colicky baby who was very picky about who held her, and in fact the sister of my ex (whose bioclock wasn’t just ticking but was actually ringing like Big Ben at midnight) was frustrated by the fact that this baby would invariably cry in her arms. Needless to say, when she was placed in my reluctant arms, she looked up at me, stopped fussing, and proceded to fall asleep in a matter of seconds. Needless to say, that created a certain rift of opinion as far as the family was concerned.
It’s a pity this doesn’t work at the bar. 
Stranger
Only one thought to add. To what the wee one originally objected probably will never be uncovered. (Glasses and hair style are two other possible provocations, BTW.) At this point, though, it seems wee one has made up her mind that she ain’t gonna be held by this auntie. Your choices are to accept that or to fight it. To fight it, you leave her with auntie (and auntie only) for a weekend. After a lot of fussing and fuming, she’ll probably get over it. Most people (myself included) wouldn’t do this unless, as MsRobyn says, there’s some reason auntie needs to be able to handle wee one.
Make that two thoughts to add. When she gets older, try to resist the urge to run out this story at every family get-together. It’ll be an inviting target, but fundamentally unfair. No one has explained to her that crying at auntie means a lifetime of teasing.
This had happened to me. I have two kids and many friends with children and typically children and babies love me and relax when I hold them. The one exception was my niece (sister’s daughter). Everytime I would walk into the room she would start crying. Forget about holding her, I could never even get within 5 feet of her without her screaming uncontrolably.
This went on for several months (6-9?) but has now stopped. She loves her uncle now and will run up to me when she comes over (she’s 18 months old now). Never did figure out why…
There was one exception. For Christmas last year I dressed up as Santa and my niece just loved me. Sat in my lap, hugged me, etc… It was very nice. Of course my daughter freaked out and would not come near me as Santa. It was a great costume.
I was the opposite as a baby-I was extremely colicky for the first few months of my life (my mother said the minute my head popped out, I started screaming bloody murder), and the ONLY one who could calm me down was my great-gramma, my dad’s dad’s mother. Since she lived just up the street from us, my mom would often take me over there so she could hold me.