I took it more as she was realizing why she has the issues she has: the a-ha moment where she puts two and two together. Realizing what has damaged you and saying the words aloud that you were hurt can be helpful in healing.
I think the first time I heard it, or at least the first time I paid any attention to the lyrics, I either had it mixed up with another song or made false assumptions about the content based on the musical style. I remember being surprised to realize that this wasn’t a song about how the singer was grateful to her wonderful parent (I assumed a single mother) for raising her right and thus providing her with the skills and strength to deal with the problems she was facing as an adult, and that it was instead basically the opposite.
My take was pretty consistent with the video, which I’d never seen before this thread. Once I paid attention to the lyrics, I figured that the “you” parent was not only overprotective but also dealing with serious issues of their own, probably related to the apparent absence of the other parent. It didn’t sound like the “you” parent was outright abusive towards the child, but was possibly neglectful and definitely distracted by their own problems so the child had to put on a brave face.
I’ve heard it a few times, and I always think it’s about a domestic abuser who isolates and controls his victim (in the context of a romantic relationship). I got overtones of Stuart Smalley confessing to some of what he went through while in a relationship with Dale, his rage-aholic ex.*
Is the consensus that it’s a damaged adult inventorying the results of dysfunctional parenting?
*I’m not the only one who remembers Senator Franken’s book, I hope. 