Bible Codes Prove Evolution!!!

In a shocking development, recent Bible code studies reveal evolution is true! A multi-year research program by a conglomerate of Bible colleges and universities was recently published. The research used state-of-the-art super computers and parallel computer configurations. It was the most comprehensive and exhaustive effort to date to extract God’s hidden messages – using the highly popular Bible code method – from His Word, the Bible. The investigation was lead by Bible Southern Technical Institute (BS Tech), in north Georgia.

All previous Bible code discoveries were confirmed, but many more were also revealed. The most important were that, contrary to popular belief, the Godly-inerrant Bible CONTAINS human error, the end-times are NOT imminent, and, most astonishing, evolution IS TRUE! Christians around the globe are rapidly flocking to new viewpoints reconciling Evangelical Christianity with traditional science, particularly Faith & Reason Ministries.

Phrases such as “believe Darwin,” “evolution is correct,” and “natural selection” are found consistently in Genesis and throughout the Bible. Not only are the words in Hebrew, Greek, Aramaic, and English, but also all known languages and dialects, even Japanese Hip-Hop. “God seems to have flagged even the time of this bombshell. It is truly extraordinary. This is probably the most important event in Christendom since Martin Luther” commented Dr. Mortimer Snerd, ThD, PhD of BS Tech. “Thank God for ministries like Faith & Reason [Ministries].”

APRIL FOOLS!

Paticulary since Bible Codes, or any codes of the sort, are crap.

Nice Joke!

Nonsense! The Bible Codes clearly show that Moby Dick foretold the assassination of Abraham Lincoln, John F. Kennedy, and Martin Luther King, Jr.!

With the Bible Code, I found the words “CELEBRATE” repeated throughout but no matter how hard I search, I couldn’t find “CELIBATE”

Am I onto something?

—With the Bible Code, I found the words “CELEBRATE” repeated throughout but no matter how hard I search, I couldn’t find “CELIBATE”
Am I onto something?—

Hopefully. Remember that while the probability of finding inteligible clusters of words is very high, the probability of finding a particular word or cluster is still low.

There are “codes” in the Bible, of course- the infamous “666” is one of them. Others are in the OT, where certain numbers appear for their numerological meanings.

But in general HPL is correct- the “Bible code” IS “crap”.

Ask yourself this: Couldn’t I find the exact same frases in a long novel if I screwed around with how I read it enough?

With the trillions of written documents and books all over the world, I’m sure you could find the exact same frases in some other text.

—Couldn’t I find the exact same frases in a long novel if I screwed around with how I read it enough?—

Chances of the exact same phrases are low.

—With the trillions of written documents and books all over the world, I’m sure you could find the exact same frases in some other text.—

Yes: chances of finding it this way are very high.

But, you’d have to translate them into Hebrew so that you have many fewer unique letter sequences and the same collection of consonants can mean many different words.

If this “Bible code” is true, then doesn’t that mean that either God or one of the exalted prophets was lying to everyone all along? Doesn’t the old Testament talk about the first man and first woman as Adam and Eve in the garden of Eden? So where did they evolve from? Either the “Bible code” is wrong, or the Old Testament is lying.

So, you take a Hebrew Bible, in Hebrew, squeeze all the words together so there are no spaces, then use it as sort of a giant word find.

Seems to me you could find lots and lots of words, ignore the words you find that you don’t like, and the ones that back up your particular religious/world view, proclaim to all the world.

I think I’ll just read one of the better English translations and assume that if God has anything to say to me via the scriptures, he’ll say it to me in English without having to go through a lot of convolutions and codes.

He does speak more than one language, you know.

“If the King’s English was good enough for Jesus, it’s good enough for me!”

tracer,
No offense intended, but I don’t believe Jesus ever read the King’s English translation of the Bible.

The so-called Bible Codes have been debunked, I believe.

Neither Organic Evolution or Creationism can ever be proven on this side of eternity. Both are belief systems. To believe in either, it takes faith.

Very good TP – ending a thread that starts with one April Fools’ jape with another.

Ho-ho.

Is this a quote from a movie? Sounds kinda Monty Pythonish (maybe merely because of it’s irreverence), but that’s probably wrong. Cite anyone? I’d love to know the source.

The bible code is crap. It’s post-hoc and you could pretty much get anything you want out of it.

il Topo: Miriam “Ma” Ferguson, Governor of Texas around 1920, said it.