Well this is gonna sound silly…
I found my solution.
I played standing up. :o
I was playing sitting down, you know, in what I think of as the classic folk singer type position. Today I was trying to figure out how to make another fingering easier for me and was intensely analyzing my posture, position ,etc., and what needed to change to make it work. I thought “Well, if I could just get my lap to be about 6 inches lower, that would help a lot.”
Bingo, the lightbulb went off in my head, and went and dug out my as-of-then unused guitar strap, rigged it up, stood up and…
Voila.
I can do barre chords. Well, I can hit them without unwanted muting at least. But now that I can actually do it, I can start practicing them. Yay!
Just wanted to let you guys know, and thank you again for your great suggestions - all stuff I will be using to improve my barre chords now that I’ve gotten the big obstacle out of my way.
Stand up. Sheesh. And I thought I might need hand reduction surgery 