Body found in blood-soaked car in Calgary alley; police term death "suspicious"

Body found in blood-soaked car in Calgary alley

Take a look at the picture in the article; pretty creepy and Dexter-esque.

One lady who lived on the street said that the car wasn’t there at 6 pm when she closed her drapes; the bloody car and body were found around 8 pm; so far, no-one has reported hearing or seeing anything.

No dimples/holes in the metal. Its not a gun, not even a shotgun. Its not an axe; no dents from misses

Machette? Hand-to-hand combat knife? Spray is side to side (like how a hand wielding a knife might swipe from side to side to put the most weight behind the blade) and the large over the trunk splash is likely a carotid, fully severed. Bled out in the car after thinking he was safe?

Slammed his hand in the door really hard?

You know, sometimes it just happens! You’re driving your car into an alley and next thing you know, POW! You just explode like a blood-filled water balloon. (A blood balloon, you might say.) This is why I don’t drive my car into alleys.

Wait. Its Calgary. The beaver there are soft, cuddly, and well-mannered. They never hunt in packs have never been known to rip the flesh from a ref after a bad call in less than 5 seconds before.

Is it nature rebelling against acid rain?

Is it global warming?

And more importantly… can Tom Ford change Ottawa’s mind on helping BEFORE the beaver turn an innocent winter carnival into a gory buck-toothed flesh grinding screaming Hell of a vacation…?
(I sense a ScyFi moving coming on…)
“On ice, Red means Go…” scene cut “Quickly.” scene cut"

Character throw away line: "Now That’s cold… "
“Beaver, schmeaver. Where’s the Shark…?”

Call Monk.

I’m just glad to be living somewhere where a blood-covered car IS suspicious!

To be serious for a second, it could be a suicide. And it might not be totally apparent immediately. I’m reminded of Charles Rocket (former SNL cast member who was famously fired after dropping the F-bomb on live TV). He committed suicide by slitting his own throat. So it could be suspicious without it ending up being a crime.

Clearly it’s a werewolf.

Wrong city; I believe Lost Girl is filmed in Toronto.

Werewolves of Calgary! OwWOOOOOOOOOOO!

One thing for sure, this was no boating accident.

“Take your dog and stay inside” is code for Get the hell out of our way you gawking fool.

“Hey man, I don’t even have an opinion.”
“Well, you gotta have an opinion! I mean, do you think that God came down from heaven and stopped the b–”

Snow Chupacabra, they have been migrating. We see this all the time down here. Be forewarned.


Hey! That’s profiling. :mad:

**Body found in blood-soaked car in Calgary alley; police term death “suspicious” **

Man…nobody’s getting anything past the Calgary P.D., are they?

More proof that Scanners are real.

(And just last night I had the pleasure of explaining to Mrs FtG what a C.H.U.D. was.)

Chupacabras (goat suckers) live in warm climates. What you have are probably “Chupacastors” (beaver suckers)…no, not that kind of beaver, I’m referring to the large semi-aquatic rodent beaver.

Minor nitpick: they are known as Calgary Police Service, or CPS for short. I’m unsure what Calgary’s child protection services are known by.

At any rate, CPS has now concluded that it was a homicide. According to CTV News: