I add the stipulation ‘good’, because no one wants to see their beloved book turned into a crappy movie. So, let’s say some really good director, who wants to be as true to the book as possible, is given a limitless budget, and can somehow sweet talk anyone into acting in the movie. What book would you want to see on the big screen? Who would play the main characters? Is there a specific director you want?
My choice? The Chronicles Trilogy by Margaret Weis and Tracey Hickman. Now that Lord of the Rings is a huge success, the door has been opened for more mainstream fantasy movies. Might as well get ol’ Action Jackson to direct. As for casting:
Tanis: Hmm…a toughie. How many red-haird actors are their? Caramon: Needs to be a somewhat big guy. Maybe Vin Diesel or the Rock? Raistlin: Leland Orser. (He currently plays the new surgeon on ER and was the guy who wore the razor-dildo in Seven.) Riverwind: Is there anyone tall enough? Eh, whichever of the two choices for Caramon wasn’t used, use 'em here. Goldmoon: Need a beautiful blond woman…Sarah Michelle Gellar? I really don’t know. Sturm: Russel Crow? Flint: Old dwarf? John Rhys-davis was good, but we need something a little different here…plus, we don’t want to typecast him as a dwarf. But I have no other ideas. Tasslehoff: Ugh. You’d probably have to get a little kid, unfortunately. Tike: Kate Winslett Laurana: An even MORE beautiful blond woman? Yeesh. I suck as casting.
So, dopers, tell me your books-as-a-movie and who you want in it.
Legend, by David Gemmell, is screaming to be adapted - but Gemmell won’t sell the adaptation rights because last time negotiations came up the exec wanted Druss not to die so they could make sequels.
Honestly, I’m at a point in my life now where I’ve read enough books and seen enough movies that I can accept the fact that they’re two different mediums and shouldn’t be mixed. The LotR movies were great and all, but they should’ve just wrote a new story for them and took the brand name off. Calling those movies “The Lord of the Rings” is like calling New Coke “Coke”, in my opinion. They share a name and the can kind of looks the same, but that’s about it.
I’m absolutely dreading the Hitchhiker’s Guide movie and the long-rumored Watchmen and Preacher movies (though I’ll see all three :o )
Now video game movies? I’d love to see a Halo movie right about now. Preferably computer animated.
‘The Descent’ by Jeff Long would make a cracking film if done right. I’m still waiting to see if Finchers going to do Rendezvous with Rama by Arthur C Clarke.
House of Leaves would do as well, but I read an interview with Danielowski saying he’s not interested in selling the rights to it.
Watership Down, but only because it’s already been done. I think Pixar might be capable of doing better.
Of course, then nobody’ll ever read the damn book again because they’ve seen the movie.
Don DeLillo’s “Great Jones Street.” Never happen, unless somebody convinces Brad Pitt and Jennifer Aniston they’d be really good in the leads. And reads them the book. Like maybe they’ll be trapped in an elevator with a grad student someday.
Richard Price’s “Freedomland.” (Home turf: his books take place in the fictional Dempsy; I live in the nonfictional Jersey City.) Maybe they’re working on this.
Pynchon’s “Crying of Lot 49.” Terry Gilliam would do a great job.
I’d love to see a faithful adaptation of Dashiell Hammett’s “Red Harvest,” and then a whole series of Continental Op movies.
I’m not sure how they would do it. Probably either animated or computer animated. Or through special effects, like they did with Gary Siniese in “Forrest Gump”. I actually read that Tim Burton was thinking about it, but I’m not sure what came of that as of now.
It could be like a 21st century version of “Freaks”, except a lot darker.