Bow before my mad condiment skillz.

Cafe Society
21

[QUOTE=Beware of Doug]
OK, so this PM I’m jonesing for a snack. And I’ve got the remains of a luuvly rotisserie turkey in the frig, all tender white meat. So I’m thinking, “What do I do with this succulent but blah white meat of turkey? Mayonnaise? Again?” Naaa. Too bland. I want a bit of hotcha-cha-cha with my sammich.

Now, I love Worcestershire sauce so much I can even spell it. So I dip a shred of turkey in some. The flavor of the WS is just absorbed, leaving a brown tinge and a taste of salt. Underwhelming at best. If only the sauce had some body, some suspension…

Suddenly I am struck by a bolt of inspiration worthy of the late H.B. Reese: PUT THE WORCESTERSHIRE SAUCE IN THE MAYONNAISE!

I shklorp a heaping tablespoon of mayo into a ramekin, followed by…hmm let’s see…ok, a level tablespoon of WS, and blend thoroughly. It turns a pleasant beige color. I dip another shred of turkey. Not bad! Sort of a
[/QUOTE]

:eek:
You have discovered our family’s secret recipe for grilled oyster/lobsters!!
:eek: :eek: :eek:

22

[QUOTE=kaylasdad99]
Mayo already has lemon juice in it, I thought.
[/QUOTE]

[Ed McMahon] You are correct, sir! [/EM]

How do you keep the lobsters from crawling off the grill?

23

[QUOTE=Tuckerfan]

How do you keep the lobsters from crawling off the grill?
[/QUOTE]

Cable ties, silly!

24

[QUOTE=kaylasdad99]
Mayo already has lemon juice in it, I thought.
[/QUOTE]
Didn’t know; not a mayo fan. I always understood its basic ingredients to be eggs and oil emulsified into the pustulant exudations of Satan’s less-than-admirable abscesses.

But, hey, learn something new every once in a while. That’s what “fighting ignorance” is all about, yes?

25

[QUOTE=ouryL]
:eek:
You have discovered our family’s secret recipe for grilled oyster/lobsters!!
:eek: :eek: :eek:
[/QUOTE]
Your oyster/lobsters are made of turkey?

What is an oyster/lobster, anyway? Do they have eeensy claws? Great big crusty shell? I’ve never seen one. Should I be glad?

26

[QUOTE=Tuckerfan]
How about Dr. Doug’s Root Juice? Do it right, and you could do for food what Dr. Bronner did for soap. :smiley:
[/QUOTE]
The 14-in-1 Miracle Sauce! Good on Poultry, Roasts, Fishes, Cocktails, Salads, Oyster/Lobsters! Too Spicy? Dilute! OK!

Root Juice has a great ring, but it sure doesn’t describe the contents. Then again, neither did Egg Cream, and that swept, well not quite the country, but certainly the Eastern Seaboard…

More names please!!!

27

Mayonnaise
Worcestershire sauce
tabasco (hot pepper) sauce

Ok, Tabasco is a brand name so that’s out.

Doug’s Best Worst Hot Mayo.

28

gigi, I like you thinking.

I’m also considering Hot Brown Mayo. 'Specially since it goes so well on turkey sammiches.

29

I liked your use of “Yumptious”.

I say you name it Doug’s Yumptious Sauce or something like it.

30

CAUTION: Use sparingly. May cause thirteen minute blackouts.

31

13 Minute Blackout

also, band name!

32

How about Doug’s Hard Mayo?

33

[QUOTE=Tuckerfan]
How about Dr. Doug’s Root Juice?
[/QUOTE]
That sounds like a euphemism for semen.

34

[QUOTE=Mangetout]
That sounds like a euphemism for semen.
[/QUOTE]

Ding! Ding! Ding! We have a winnah! I wondered how long it was going to take for someone to pick up on that.

35

[QUOTE=Beware of Doug]
I’m also considering Hot Brown Mayo.
[/QUOTE]
And that one sounds like a euphemism for diarrhoea

36

My mother used to add chopped garlic, onions and pickles to the same mixture. It was her mother’s recipe for tartar sauce.

37

How about mayonaire. You cant euphemesmerise that! Also, its keeping the main ingredient visible, but with a twist, so that when you hear the name, you got to find out what happened to the mayo.

Kotick (mayo-indian)

38

[QUOTE=Kotick]
How about mayonaire. You cant euphemesmerise that!
[/QUOTE]
HaHA! ‘can’t’ is a word I never use, except just then, when i said ‘can’t’…
Damn.

39

[QUOTE=Mangetout]
HaHA! ‘can’t’ is a word I never use, except just then, when i said ‘can’t’…
Damn.
[/QUOTE]

Ni!

40

Any progress on finding out what one of these ‘ramekin’ things is? Or are we conceding that we just don’t know, and probably never will?

Maybe it was explained in the missing 13 minutes. Maybe they also contained a photo of Cecil. Hey… they could have contained anything…