To put this question into perspective: I have 3 kids. 2 boys and a girl. The youngest is now almost 26 (a boy) so now you know where I, specifically, am coming from as a parent.
From the ages of, about 8 to, about 12 or so, getting my sons to bathe was a fucking battle.
I remember myself and my 2 brothers being a pain in the ass to our parents at, approximately those ages, about bathing too.
WHY?
We loved to swim and shit like that. Is there some evolutionary factor that kicks in?
If a male is not repulsively stinky at that age does it affect his desirability towards the opposite sex that he’s not ready to deal with? WTF?
It’s conditioning, not genetics. A boy in a different environment might be obsessed with bathing. The fact that the views of you and your brothers have been passed on to your children is far from unusual.
Like I was (& still kinda am). I was the boy who hated getting dirty, washed his hands obsessively, and bathed every day without prompting. Hell, when I was really little I used to enjoy scrubbing my grandmother’s bathtub after I took a bath (& was still naked). There are pictures to prove it too.
At no point in my/my wifes child rearing was taking a bath ever presented as communism, wimpy, or any other anti-bath terminology that one could present.
Having had sisters (and a daughter) raised in pretty much the same manner, I insist it has something to do with the sex of the child, not the parents nor rearing ways.
For some weird reason boys go through a stage where bathing is not desirable.
Why?
Conditioning doesn’t need to be that overt (indeed, it’s usually more effective if it isn’t). Subtle things like the fact that so many hair and beauty ads are aimed at women sink in. Seriously.
And before anyone straw man’s me, I’m not saying that young children understand everything in adverts and automatically aspire to such roles, just that they’re getting a lot of information about what we associate with men and women.
Nor am I saying it’s all conditioning: just that you can’t rule out conditioning on the basis that you don’t recall personally saying anything negative about bathing.
Personally I would turn the question around.
I think it makes sense for boys to hate bathing: it’s a chore, with no demonstrable benefit at that age.
So why do girls keep so clean?
Well, right now my 8-year old niece happens to be going through a phase of not bathing. She seems aware however, that her behaviour is seen as freakish not merely “understandable but naughty”, the way that boys might see things. There’s no doubt in my mind that the way her parents have responded to her behaviour is different than if she were a boy.
this. once I started getting greasy and pimply, I was religious about showering. 'course, I was still short, fat, and ugly so it didn’t really help, but at least I wasn’t filthy.
I had a toy submarine, and, having OD’ed on Voyage to the Bottom of the sea reruns, fought nightly battles against the latest Monster of the Week. The tub is about as fun a place as I could imagine-not sure what everybody else’s problem with it was.
I call bulshit on the conditioning part as well. I have two young daughters that sometimes like to bathe once you get them in but good luck with that. They don’t like sitting still that long unless you can get them entertained about it and then they won’t want to get out. Even then, it might be a battle to wash their hair because they just don’t want the hassle let alone the soap that might get in their eyes. They always have better things to do. 1 kid minute = 1 adult hour to many of them and you can’t debate them in any reasonable way. It is as simple as wet+boring+hassle = bad news to them some of the time.
I don’t think that’s what he had in mind…
As far as I recall, I didn’t have that no-bathing phase. My mom had given me the serious “people that don’t bathe are gross” and all that from an early age, so I’ve bathed at least daily my whole life. Granted, between 8 and 12, I probably should have bathed more than once a day a lot of the time, but at least I kept up the one time a day.
I don’t know what the cause is, but I was exactly the same. I hated baths. Not just the act of bathing, the actual bath itself could be pretty cool, I hated the whole squeaky clean feeling afterwards. Couldn’t stand it. Weird to think about now.
I asked a similar question awhile back and the answer seemed to be for young kids, bath time was the “end” of something. It wasn’t that they didn’t like to take a bath, but it was the way it was presented. OK get your bath done, the PJs on and it’s off to bed. But Junior is playing and doesn’t want his fun to end.
It’s like when I took my cat in the car. She only rode to the vet so to Miss Kitty, cars = vet and vets = shot
No clue what the deal is. Dweezil (age 16) STILL won’t shower voluntarily. We’ll tell him to do so, and he’ll argue “I just showered the other day”. OK, when was that? “uh…” (because he doesn’t want to admit that “the other day” was a WEEK ago.
I thought boys this age were supposed to figure out how great “long showers” could be???
My two cents: At that age, I probably would have argued that I didn’t feel dirty, so why should I have to take a bath?
By the time I became a greasy teenager, that was no longer the case; since the age of 12 or 13, if I go even one day without a bath/shower, it’s like I rubbed a bucket of KFC in my hair.
Boy here. When I was a kid, I didn’t want to take a bath either. I recall that, for me, it was the soap. I hated the feel and smell of soap. And if you got it in your eyes or in your nose, it burned like hell. This I suppose was the result of my parents getting a bit too rough at times while washing me as a small child. This aversion continued until was in my early teens. Fortunately I’ve gotten over all that now; I get at least two showers a day. And unlike as a kid, I prefer showers to baths. I mean, a bath? It’s disgusting! Sitting in a tepid pool of your own filth!
I stumbled across a blog of a guy who had given up soap, not bathing. I decided to put it to the test. In three weeks of daily showering without soap, changing clothes daily as before, I was surprised to find that I did not become stinky, my skin wasn’t as dry, and my hair remained soft. Makes me wonder how much of the soap we use is really necessary.
