Breaking Buffett News!

Cafe Society
1

I’m sure this question has come up before, many times, but I can’t find it in a search.

But the definitive answer to one of the greatest questions of our time is now available.

Are Jimmy Buffett and Warren Buffett related?

The June 11 Fortune magazine will report that a DNA analysis of the two shows that their last common ancestor was from 10,000 years ago. So they basically have the same relationship as you and me, whoever you are.

“Bottom line,” Warren says, “we’re not related.”

Spread the news!

2

So this isn’t about a buffet? Damn. I’m hungry.

3

What are the chances the bacon and the carved ham are related? The eggs and the chicken quesadillas? That’s what I want to know.

4

Of course they’re related! But then again, so are Exapno and myself. Bricker and Der Trihs are related about the same way as well.

5

I wonder which one gets the “Oh! Are you related to <other Buffett>??” bit the most.

6

Meet Warren, who’s lived most everywhere,
From Zanzibar to Barclay Square.
But Jimmy’s only seen the sights
A boy can see from wild bar fights –
What a crazy pair!

But they’re cousins,
Identical cousins all the way.
One pair of matching bookends,
Different as night and day.

Where Warren adores a minuet,
The Wall Street Journel, and crepe suzette,
Our Jimmy loves to rock and roll,
A cheeseburger makes him lose control –
What a wild duet!

Still, they’re cousins,
Identical cousins and you’ll find,
They laugh alike, they walk alike,
At times they even talk alike –
You can lose your mind,
When cousins are two of a kind