The serious answer to the OP’s question is no, you can’t just shoot crows whenever you want.
Crow hunting is regulated in most states. There is a defined crow hunting season, usually with bag limits, etc. For states without defined crow seasons the rules fall to the USFW rules.
Here are some links, you really do need to check with your own state wildlife agencies for the rules that apply in your area.
Wrong. Pennsylvania has a defined crow hunting season, July 4 through April 5th and you can only hunt them on Fri, Sat, and Sunday. And you need a hunting license.
Not a bad assumption considering I am often hyperbolic to amuse myself, but these birds are really out of hand. So what’s all this now about me not being able to shoot crows whenever I want? What if they wake me up in the middle of the night everyday, and are generally annoying? Is there some “damn birds had it coming” clause?
Poison is your friend.
And no, I’m not joking. It’s the best way to get rid of a bird problem like this. There are several psychedelic avian poisons available in the US. They give the birds a really bad acid trip, which causes them to flee the area permanently. Crows being so wonderfully intelligent, it works amazingly well. Pigeons, not so well.
It may or not be available over the counter at your local rural suppliers depending on your location, but most pest companies will be able to apply it for you if it isn’t.
Barring gunfire statutes and/or proximity issues, you can kill vermin any time of the year. Crows unloading that much poop would definitely qualify them as nuisances. Even if there are gunfire or proximity issues, that doesn’t preclude other means such as poison, air guns, wrist rockets (I suggest ball bearings over beans), etc.
I’m on a quest to eliminate the flock of sparrows living in one of my sheds and decorating my pickup truck.
The best way to eliminate sparrows in that situation is to block up any nesting sites with wire mesh. They’ll move on.
The short term solution is the use of bird lime. Sparrows are suckers for that. String out some wire/twine and sprinkle some millet in the ground underneath for a week or so until they get used to all perching on the line at the same time. Then coat the line with lime. You should be able to get 95% of the flock in one hit if you do it right.
Pack the line up in an container with a small opening. Connect the container to a hose which runs through a bucket of cold water and into your car’s exhaust. Turn on engine Wait 5 minutes. Bury line and birds. Quick, painless, relatively stress free, cheap, effective.
That’ll be tough. It’s an open air shed.
No.
I like this idea about getting the birds high. Shooting them with sling shots sounds like more fun, though.
Here in Georgia, my nemesis is the Blue Jay. The only more annoying bird I can think of is an African Gray parrot. Blue Jays apparently feel that 5 to 6 am is the time to get up and start screaming in my neighborhood. I’ve hated them since I was a small child.
Last summer, I was awakened at dawn by the calls of every local bird imaginable. Cardinals, robins, jays - and more. All right outside my bedroom window. Non-stop.
Saturday morning, well before 8. I was so pissed. I lay there under the pillows trying to drown it all out, but to no avail. Finally, I jumped out of bed, threw the window open and started screaming like a maniac to the avian world in general, describing exactly how each one would die when I got back with my gun.
And there, perched on a branch not 3 feet from my big mouth, sat a small Barred Owl no bigger than my fist. I stopped in amazement at first, then laughed my ass off at all these birds upset at the apex predator endangering their forest. I looked around and could a dozen different birds hopping around the branches, keeping their distance like wary boxers.
They weren’t brave enough to come near enough for a blow, but they were making damn sure that everyone in the area knew exactly where the danger was.
I got the kids up to see, I got the video camera, and we watched the little guy just sit there all alone for 30 minutes, just surveying the land. He wasn’t at all disturbed by our presence, even though I probably could have reached out and touched him if I’d wanted.
During that time, we heard Momma Owl hooting nearby, and some smaller hoots as well.
Clearly today was the first day out of the nest. When he flew to a tree out front, we followed, and watched as he joined up with two of his nestmates to assess life in the Great Big World.
They eventually left and the birds all went about their business, and I never got back to bed.
As for the crows, your local laws will apply, but for the quietest firearm solution (assuming you don’t have access to a suppressor) look for Aguila Super Colibri (no powder, just primer), or Aguila Super Sniper Subsonic rounds in .22. These are very quiet rounds that won’t disturb the neighbors.
Good Luck.