I’m not gonna lie. I’m a big snob…against people who think too seriously about “acting ones age”. Being responsible is one thing. But you can be responsible and still full of youthful exuberance and disinhibition.
Woah woah woah! I never said anything about caring. 
If you want to leave the house looking all clownshoes, go for it.
Bwuh? Please tell me you’re either joking or you just have that kind of silly relationship with her, otherwise, I’d be sorely tempted to never buy her anything but rugs like that.
Haha. Yesssss. I’m not going to look down on others as not an adult because of all the things that’s been listed in this thread, but I’ll be damned if I have any fucks left to give over someone who insists I’m still a child (??) because I won’t let them call me Kem. Just no.
ETA: And I’m totally on board with youthful exuberance and disinhibition. I’ll always be the one riding the slide at the county fair, getting my face painted for shits and giggles or trying to line dance. I’ll never see those people again that are judging me and life is way too full of serious shit to not grasp the golden ring of whatever good you can find out there. I want to be happy, not mature.
As someone who didn’t have youthful exuberance when I was young, I judge those of you who expect me to have it now. I was 80 when I was 18. Of course, now that I am in my late 30s I am still 80, so at least I haven’t aged!
As for judging inconsequential things as signs of not being an adult… I rarely use the word adult in this scenario, instead opting for ‘grown’ and involves knowing the game of life… ie "No grown woman would think that is appropriate attire for a job interview at a Fortune 500. “No grown man would approach a woman with that nonsense for a pickup line”
Thank you, Marelt. I do believe you just provided me with first-hand examples.
Happy to help!
In general though, I don’t really care what folks wear where. In other words, noticing does not equal caring. So if someone wears jeans to interview at an Investment Bank, I am not in any way harmed or upset by it. But I will keep in mind that that person may not understand or care about behavioral norms.
You’re not an adult if you insist on forever acting like an aging frat boy. I know a 36-year-old Texan over here who does exactly that. It’s difficult to think of him as anything but a teenager. Unfortunately, Thailand attracts a lot of that, and this guy is the biggest example that I personally see.
I think there are points that you can accumulate and once you have enough points, you are for all intents and purposes, not an adult.
The excellent example of never buying your own underwear = 1 point; use of Axe body spray = 1 point; calling women chicks 1 point; etc.
You reach enough points and you are not an adult, you still can be tried as one, though.
Your sister sounds like an awful human being. Decorative pillows are adult? Who says? And how is the backing of the bath mat you buy indicative of anything?
Or, more to the point, the idea of having one job which pretty well defines you and supports your whole existence is going away, and eventually so will the stigma of being “under-employed” as defined by supporting yourself on a series of temporary positions and/or more than one part-time position. If things go the way I think they will, the stigma at being on partial public assistance will go away as well (as if 40-hour-a-week workers were ever self-sufficient either).
At one time, most adults either owned their own farm, at least up to mortgage, or worked on one owned by another smallholder. That didn’t end until the 1930s, in fact, so it’s within living memory. The economy shifts and everyone goes along for the ride, and eventually social attitudes actually shift to match the new reality.
As far as I’m concerned, being unwilling to learn new tools is the sign of a childish mentality: “Do it for me! It’s necessary to my well-being but I refuse to put forth the effort to figure it out!”
Mr Magnet and I spent our second anniversary last week at a seaside fun fair riding all the kiddie rides and road raging with 13 year olds on the dodge’ems.
I had to go over to Paris earlier in the week, and at lunchtime decided to eat only an enormous dame blanche – a seriously gorgeous version of an ice cream sundae.
I thought the whole point of being a grownup was liberty to act as childishly as one likes 
I think even with Asians there is a difference between just living with your family and being a leach. Are you gainfully employed? If not, do you work helping around the house like for example, cooking all the family meals? Which I might add, from what Ive seen of Asian meals is practically a full time job in itself.
Asian families I know have everyone working a job AND a proportion of their income goes into the family pot.
I dont think even Asian families want a 28 year old who sits around all day playing video games.
Wow… attacking my sister. Not cool. It’s a fun game we play. Especially considering she’s 2 years younger than me. There’s a kernel of truth to it though, that doing household things like decorating, taking care of the place, etc, makes you more of an adult. But yes it’s in good fun. Plus she always lets me argue my case and always adjudicates fairly on whether or not I’m acting like an adult or if I still need to grow up.
I don’t know if others consider it inconsequential or not, but I have a few “adult/not-adult” rules in my own mind.
If you spend money to alter your vehicle in any way for the purpose of increasing its noise output, you are a child. Period. Adults are capable of existing in public spaces without startling or offending others to get attention.
You may think you’re impressing the mundanes with the steely-eyed glaze of Charles Bronson while revving your preposterous motorcycle, but all we’re seeing is the self-satisfied look of a toddler on a pot.
You brought it up. And besides that, your sister is wrong. Decorative pillows are most popular with blue-haired old ladies and little girls. Saying they’re something “adults” do is just wrong in my mind. And the bath mat thing is moronic. Am I more adult than you because the backing of my bath mat is vinyl? Of course not. And what about people who just use floor tiles? What exactly is “unadult” about that? Nothing.
Honestly, it sounds like a game created by a childish person.
Come on now. It’s obvious to me that drew’s sister is just joking. If your older sibling can’t give you a good-natured ribbing, who the hell can?
I don’t fold my laundry. I just cram everything into my dresser drawers. I also wear mismatched socks on occasion because I can’t be bothered to match them before putting them away. And I can’t be arsed to keep a dedicated sock drawer. I’ll be the first to say this is all pretty childish behavior. It’s not what you would expect someone my age to do. And if someone pointed this out, I’d just laugh and nod my head. Because it’s true, I’m totally a kid at heart about stuff like this. But I also know that how I organize my underwear is completely inconsequential to my goodness as a person. If I can’t tolerate a little teasing without getting all butthurt, then they’re absolutely right. I am a child.
You’re being really rude.
This is sooooo not the thread I was hoping for, since I wanted it only to be about inconsequential judgments. drew, I apologize for my comment about your sister. I meant it to be playful, but I can see now how it could come across as disparaging. My apologies.
Faithfool - Things that make me judge ME for not being an adult? I am sitting on my couch eating chips and salsa while I have a to do list a mile a long. A true adult would get off her ass and empty the dishwasher, start a load of laundry and get to cleaning!
Heh, Marelt, nope. I still wear dealie bobbers on my head to amuse the seniors I volunteer with, am planning a water balloon fight for my husband’s 50th birthday and prefer my pizza cold. I got no room to ever judge someone else on their piddly little childish quirks. Me? I has tons of them. 