Kewl. And no, I hadn’t heard it before. Thanks Jack.
I’d sure vote for it.
And the rest of the thread is living up to it, too.
+1
ultrafilter - I thought your music collection threads were a work of genius, but now we know you are an eccentric genius!
Bravo, Sir - I say Bravo!
I’ve always herd/told it as “Superman, you’re an ass when you’re drunk.”
Not off topic at all. That joke was alluded to in post #7.
So, basically, Superman would have the same luck in tearing off his head as a Superhorse would?
What?
So, to take a more realistic approach, could Superman, say, break or tear off some of his own fingers? Or rip out his own heart?
OMG does anyone realize these charactors are not real?
OMG does anyone realise this thread is four months old?
OMFG, if 2up3rm4n d3capitat3d hiss31f, wud h3 3v3n di3!!!11???
joins the ovation
I have to say, while this thread’s still freshly undead…I have no idea what joke I was trying to make, back here.
Since the thread has reanimated, I might as well respond.
The rumors of my decapitation have been greatly exaggerated.
I know it’s a few months late, but I have a few options that will probably get shot down.
1- Superman and all from the planet Krypton are of the same species as the Thing from some John Carpenter movie, whose name i can’t remember. As we all know, from that one scene that creeps everyone out the first time they see it, and again in the blood burning scene, every piece of the body acts of its own accord. With this, logically, the main body (including digits, appendages, torso, etc.) would be able to fully function even after.
2- For you naysayers of the last option, consider Superman uses the device that makes him human in Superman 2, but he reaches his arm outside the shield so that it retains its strength. His arm thus rips his head off, considering the tug is quick enough to retain enough force to rip off the SuperHead.
3- From earlier, I feel it goes without saying that Superman can cut himself with his own fingernail. Because of this, it could also be said that he has a SuperNailclipper (unless he chews his nails) that would be able to cut through his skin. He would thus be able to cut through most of his head before bloodflow would become a factor, and then simply pluck his head from the spine (if not pull the spine out completely). Even snapping his neck, as long as he was pulling in the same motion would fulfill the mind experiment.
As for the Batman Crusification, he’s flexible enough to pound in the stakes for his hands by using his feet, because he’s freaking Batman. Then, to impale his feet, all he would have to do is click his heels and expose the ice skates (from Batman and Robin, in case you were smart and avoided the film), which he would drive through his own feet and into the crusafix. However, we all know that this is not Batman’s final fate, because he is the intellectual and pollitical heart of Quohog, Rhode Island.
“Why, thank you, tinkle fairy!”
Good post. Funny, but the spelling could use some work.
It occurs to me; if he rammed his hands up with superspeed and strength, he might manage to pop his head clean off before the tearing of his spinal cord has time to render his limbs limp.
As well, < applaudes Terrifel >
One of the funniest things I’ve read.
Teh funnay!
So, how many zombie heads is Superman capable of tearing off?
jesus christ why did you resurrect this old thing…
The OP was properly answered 4 years and 2 days ago by the second post. Let it die.
Before we rebury this thread… is the Batman/Superman death contest really original to this thread? Because my brother swears he’s seen it floating around on the Internet.