Sorry, my body is shaped like a wedge pushing them off, so my britches are working their way off whether they’re tight or not, provided I move. But the advent of jeans cut like clown pants has meant testicular comfort to me for the last 10 years (yeah, I am slow at picking up on fashion). Please don’t ban them. I’ll have to become that loon wearing a kilt or overalls in inappropriate situations. Nobody wants that.
Before you ask: No, they’re not diseased or anything. They’re just ample.
That’s why I miss JNCO jeans, scabpicker. They had the waist fitting perfectly, but by the time you got to the crotch, they were baggy as hell. My boys need room to move around, to swing free! No man’s junk should be throttled by his pants! Can I get an amen?!?!!!
If wearing your pants so the waist is somewhere within the vicinity of your natural waist (this means above your hips, people) means that your balls are being jammed into your asscrack, you either fail at buying the correct size pants, the correct size or type of underwear or both.
JNCO jeans are anathema to all that is right and good. I should not be able to construct a tent out of the denim from your pant leg.
You do realize that men’s pants only have two measurements, right? Waist and inseam. There’s no measurement for “distance from waistband to crotch.” You just have to buy jeans from different companies, kinda like women do. For example, I’ve never been able to wear Levi’s because having my balls separated by the seam of a pair of jeans makes them lonely.
You obviously don’t know what you’re talking about, as only the JNCO Mammoth’s had that much fabric (50" leg opening ftw!). I know, I own a pair; they rock.
Most JNCO’s (“Judge None, Choose One”) had a 23" leg opening, as opposed to a regular Levi’s 14" leg opening. Not all of us have thighs and feet that fit comfortably in or through that skinny a tube, and some of us are also packing junk that would scare an anaconda carrying grapefruit. :eek:
Yeah, sometimes buying clothing can suck. You may have to spend more then 15 minutes or try on more than two pairs of jeans. Call me when you have a real complaint.
I don’t want it to go away. I always got compliments on how I well dressed I looked, and all I did was not let my pants drag. And I even only did that out of necessity to keep from showing something that is a little higher than normal on me.
So don’t buy regular levi’s. The relaxed fit has a leg opening of 16 1/2 inches and the loose straight has 19 1/2 inches. If you need more than that, you’re deformed.
And at least the Levi’s website does include the rise measurement so really, this couldn’t be easier.
So you have to carry your own measuring tape to figure it out? I think trying different companies on is faster.
And it wasn’t a complaint, it was an explanation of why you don’t fail at buying the wrong size per se. When I was a kid, I resisted jeans for years because my mom was still buying my clothes. The waist fit and the legs went down to the correct length, but I couldn’t figure out why I was constantly digging my pants out of my ass. I thought jeans were just designed to be uncomfortable.
Women’s pants and jeans sizes are even dumber. They give you one number. Who thought that was a good idea?
If you want. It would be a good idea to at least figure out your own rise, though, doncha think? And like I just said, the Levi’s website, at least, has a rise measurement.
Luckily, as a child, I was aware that my mom does not have ESP as one of her many talents and so, when clothing didn’t fit right, I articulated that as well as I could rather than just suffering in silence. I have no idea where the one number came from in women’s clothing. It is dumb, as is the vanity sizing.
As a fashion statement, Baggy Pants are a disaster, but the Baggy Pants Trend does have one very redeeming value…
On Saturday Night at 8pm, tune in to “COPS”, and you’ll see that Baggy Pants are as valuable to police as a nightstick.
Every time the COPS team stops a car… the occupants, usually athletic young men, bail out of the car, Baggy Pants sagging, and run for it.
The 40 year old, beer bellied, out of shape COPS have no chance of catching these young men, if it weren’t for their Baggy Pants tripping the criminals.
Handcuffs, nightstick, tazer, and Baggy Pants… are COPS best friends!
~
As I once told ayoung bebop guy “I lived through the hippie era and saw a lot of strange clothes, but oversized pants showing your underwear is the stupidest fashion I’ve ever seen.”
