Canadians! Keep your worthless currency to yourselves

The BBQ Pit
1

Scenario:

Me, on toll road approaching toll booth, feeling around for change … need 3 quarters … oh shit I don’t have any change but I thought I had plenty, AHA! There! in my pocket! 3 quarters and 3 quarters only! Phew. Pull into toll booth, palm 3 quarters, heave into basket. BUZZZ, click click, 2 quarters rejected?! But how can this be? Dodo-head toll booth guy waddles over, slowly. I grab 2 rejected quarters from basket, try again, BUZZZ, click click, please insert another .50 cents. Dodo-head toll booth guy grabs for my rejected money. “These are Canadian quarters,” he says squintingly and authoritatively (as if he was Clint Eastwood circa 1974, just about to shoot a wad in his pants as he jams a magnum up Osama bin Laden’s ass); “no good”. Meaning, of course, that I am automatically presumed a bad person by my trying to get by the toll with what’s basically a slug or a washer.

I’ll skip the part about him making me sit and fill out a FORM, promising to send in a check or money order for fifty fucking cents, while gridlock built steadily behind me all the while; that part is irrelevant to the story. What irks me is that our treacherous neighbor to the north is trying to flood our great nation with their identically sized, yet half the value coinage.

Listen up, you beer-swilling, zamboni-driving, moose-humping Frenchmen. YOU guys were the fucking tories, choosing to stay with King George and all that. Why didn’t you pattern your coins after the UK’s, if you love the British so much?

I think I know why. It’s because you want everything we have, but you’re so cheap that you’ll only pay half price for it. You want a US newspaper for 12 cents. A coke for 30 cents. A pay-phone call for 19 cents. A game of pool for whatever it works out to be. Fucking freeloaders. Even worse is that your shit currency has been turning up in MY pockets for YEARS now, and I’ve never even BEEN to Canada.

I demand that all Canadians cease the smuggling of this jingling larceny into our great nation at once. Attempting to undermine the economy of the USA is tantamount to an act of war, and if you didn’t notice we have a President just itching to start WWIII. Might as well start on you, ‘eh?’. So shape up, and keep your money ‘oot’.

2

:: takes a BIG step away from RTA ::

Since I’m hopefully about to be the recipient of a box of Canadian confectionary in a matter of weeks, I’d just like to say that this OP in no way represents the majority of US citizens.

Yeah, I want my candy. So what of it? I’ve got my priorities, dammit.

3

A quick sweep of your change with a powerful magnet will help you avoid this problem in the future…

Just trying to help here…

4

War?

I guess you forgot what happened the last time we got into a scuffle. We kicked your asses back across the border.

And what the hell is this yankee dime doing in my pocket?

5

And a quick sweep of his groin with a uranium slug might help the rest of us avoid the problem of his whiny-ass genes sneaking into the pool.

6

I don’t know what yer gettin all upset aboot, eh. Want another burned down white house?
Ok, ok. we’ll strengthen our currency, just as soon you yanks stop making crappy beer. (like having sex in a canoe, i tell ya)

7

> And what the hell is this yankee dime doing in my pocket?
<
Compared to the rest of the money in your pocket, increasing in value. :slight_smile:

8

Slip/IM_A_Loser: I kicked Mike Tyson’s ass awhile back. Of course, he was 6 and I was 12. Regardless, no need for RTA to rattle sabers with our friends to the north. It’s obvious RTA has “issues” with you folks.

On the OP, I grew up in Alaska, and the stores used to always give us Canadian quarters. Sucked when I was a kid, because the video games wouldn’t take the damned things. Plus, you could usually slip them back to stores when you were buying something, but nobody would let you just exchange them for “real money” that could be used in games.

9

I’m not sure why you’re blaming the Canadians. They probably have a lot of the same laws prohibiting the removal of currency that most countries have.

The problem is all the silly Yanks wandering over to the casinos, not taking the time to exchange their coins afterward, then wandering home to distribute to cashiers everywhere.

You think its bad getting caught with Canadian change? My daughter found a Swiss Franc that she keeps getting mixed into the family coinage. I’m always having to take it back and tell her to put it away, somewhere. Same size and color as the quarter.

10

At least canoes tip.

elmwood quietly ducks and runs away

11

RTA is right on the money!

(Except for the moose-humping, that’s patently untrue.)

12

I know for a fact that Canadian quarters work in the parking meters in Delray Beach, FL. Cuts down on the cost of going to the beach every day during a two week vacation.

13

Reminds me of a humorous story:

Me and and a friend drove up to Vancouver for the day since he had never been. While there we ended up getting some local currency for food and such.

Well we forgot to exchange our money on the way back over. No big deal to me from all my trips I have like a box full of foriegn money i never get around to exchanging.

Well the next day, my friend and I go into downtown Seattle. As I approach the parking garage I think, what the hell i may as well try to get rid of some of this money so I ask the cashier “Do you take canadian money?”. Keep in mind, i asked him, in English, no hint of any accent and my license plates on my truck are obviously from Washington and my truck could NOT be mistaken for a rental.

He looks at me and says (very loudly and slowly, as if talking to someone who doesn’t speak english) “Yes, but your money is not worth as much as ours!” Then he takes out a US dollar, and continues speaking in the loud slow manner “This is a US dollar, this is what our money looks like, if you give me a 10 i can only give you two of these in change!” Then as he gives us change he counts out “oooonnnnneeee, twwwoooooooo”.

My friend, ever the joker, leans over and says “we’re Canadian Eh! We’re not retarded!”

14

If he gave you 2 US dollars for 10 Canadian, I am sorry to break it to you but he was a swindler and you were robbed.

15

Hey. HEY! HEY!

I’m not French.
And you’re the one with the toll roads. I’d say that’s your responsibility to make sure that you’ve got the correct change; amount and nationality.

16

Seen on a t-shirt in Mexico last week:

¡Por Dios! Yo sé que el dolar canadiense vale madre. ¡Pero ese no es mi problema!

Translation:

For God´s sake, I know the Canadian dollar isn’t worth squat but that’s not my problem!

17

Yes, but thats only because half the population of florida during the winter is canadian, & we’ve infiltrated their defenses. Hmmmm, wonder if we should tell the americans about our secret plan to use florida as a staging point to annex cuba (purely for the piss-off factor)

18

When I worked at McDonald’s I would find the strangest coins in my register, from whoever worked it before my shift. Pesos, francs, Deutchmarks, polygonal Philippines coins, even Chinese coins with goddamn holes in them. Not that that’s bad, but why the hell are they in a US cash register? Some of these coins don’t look remotely like US coins. But then, I suppose you can’t expect too much intelligence at McDonald’s. There was one girl who I swear didn’t even know how to count money. “How much is this?” she’d ask, with a handful of change. Uh, did you like fail elementary school?

19

They also work in the soda machine in my office. After my trip to Montreal last summer I had a bunch of quarters and discovered this. The only problem was that for the longest time after I thought I’d used them all karma was messing with me. I’d put a dollar in the machine and get back two US dimes and a Canadian quarter. Dammit.

20

Do you think the real problem is your inability to know what you’re carrying or an overzealous bureaucracy that makes you fill out money orders on your toll roads?

Just be glad the rent-a-cop didn’t shoot you through your greedy, jingoistic, Krispy Kreme loving, monolingual heart. Couldn’t you just get a colour photocopier and whip off a few sawbucks?