You might want to try hypnosis. Lots of people have great success stories regarding behavior modification through hypnosis. Smoking, eating, gambling…hell…my mom gave birth to my sister, drug-free, through hypnosis. And didn’t feel a thing. However, I have no idea how you go about finding a qualified hypnotist. I mean, are they certified?
Perhaps some positive thinking would help. I think it is easier to move towards a diet if you aren’t beating yourself up. Instead of focusing on what you have gained back, focus a bit more on what you have managed to keep off. You did something pretty rare, and no matter what happens now, even if you gain it all back and more, you are better off for having lost so much weight. In other words, you have proved yourself to be a winner, and that can’t go away.
Unless you think you have some deep-seated issues, and to a casual reader of your post, you don’t seem like you do, then focusing on strategies may be what you need. People here have offered good ones. Keep trying them, and see which ones work. Think of it more like smoking–a habit with a physical connection–then anything like a will power or moral lapse, and you have to fool your habit more than your head.
I think that most diets work because of a sort of misdirection. The problem with diets is that they mean eating less, and that just doesn’t sound fun at all. So you have to distract it. What worked for me is Atkins, which I investigated first for the science, but which really worked because I like those types of foods. It was interesting to focus on carb counts instead of calories, and I felt like I could have treats because the foods allowed were good, and it wasn’t that big on measuring and limiting portions, just carbs. Also, by making such a significant change in my diet, it masked that I was also trying to learn portion control. My habit focused on the novelty instead of the amount.
It is a sort of discovery, like using smaller plates: you find out that it is not the amount you eat that your habit cares about, but to clean the plate. Similarly, I found if I made sure dinner had three things (say, a salad and a veg and meat, or a cup of soup and meat and salad, or even just meat and two veg, etc.), and not just one thing, I felt more satisfied and didn’t go looking for other things to eat.
Good luck to you!
Yes, but “certified” just means they took a seminar or class and got a piece of paper for attendance. That doesn’t mean they’re any good. It could mean they studied for a weekend or for a year. The best way to find one is by referral. Barring that, open the phone book or local hippie rag and start making phone calls. Find out where they got their certificate from. How many hours did they study? How many clients did they do supervised work with before certification? How long have they been in practice? Can they put you in contact with former clients who are happy with their work? Do they keep any statistics on their success rates? How about long-term success rates?
Anyone who won’t answer these questions is not someone I will trust with my subconscious, but YMMV.