Cause and Effect. God? Karma? Coincidence?

In My Humble Opinion
1

There have been a few moments in my life that simply astound me as wickedly weird evidence for…some sort of unknown power of force in action… I refuse to say God because that is just so cliche and easy. I am a complete agnostic… I mean Jesus could appear before me and I would wonder skeptically for every possible explanation…a high tech hoax, aliens…ok…it could really be Jesus and Jesus could really be the son of God…and God could be a super benevolent all knowing being…but then I would be like “Jesus…uh…yea why all the horrible evil bad stuff in the world if you are so great?..”

Anyways, there have been a handful of times in my life where I have felt and spoken a need to the Universe and then my need is fulfilled in a very quick and easy way…

When I was in 7th grade, I felt very lonely. And one night, I remember the moment clearly, I was walking out of my room, and I said to myself and the Universe…ok at the time I prayed so I said it to God, “I need a friend. I really need a best friend.” And I felt this need like a real valid vacancy in my life… a best friend was what I needed…

The NEXT day, I was sitting in Math class and this boy sitting behind me who I barely knew, just said to me, “We should go see a movie sometime.” That boy became my best friend for 2 years, we basically lived at eachother’s houses.

At the time, I considered that experience very strong evidence for the existence of God… Long since then, I have become agnostic, but I still recognize that experience as a remarkable example of a “desire voiced to the universe” being somehow almost magically “answered and satisfied”.

Ok, the reason I am posting this now is because it just happened to me AGAIN.

Yesterday, I was sitting at home, in a new town, few friends, getting divorced, and I just realized, “I need a friend.” I need someone who I can go hang out with, play pool… I don’t need a woman, I need a guy friend. And I thought about 7th grade and that kid and I sat in my house and I said-To the Universe- “I need a friend.” I think I even visualized for a few moments what kind of friendship I need…

And then today, just about 45 minutes ago, this guy I work with walked into my office and said, “I have 15 minutes and I don’t want to do anything so I am going to sit in here.” He just walked in and sat down. He has never done this before. I actually have a very busy job, so often this would not work out…but this moment was very good timing… He sits there, I interrogate him in a friendly way for about 20 minutes…eventually we get to…“Do you play pool? Yea? We should go play pool sometime” We sort of laugh at how we both realize we need someone to go hang out with sometime…and we both seem comfortable with eachother… And, so basically, in a nutshell… I think the Universe just delivered a friend to me…right on schedule.

So now I am convinced Jesus is the messiah and the only son of God and…NOT. No, I do not take this as evidence of God… I simply take this experience for what it is… An infuriatingly seemingly clear example of a force at work in the Universe that can hear my thoughts and somehow create a situation where a person walks into my office and asks to meet my deeply felt need… I don’t know… Am I living in the Matrix?

Coincidence? Just pure wacky random utter coincidence?

Pure coincidence combined with my subtle unconscious non verbal signals combined with pheromones that I unknowingly broadcasted around, “I need a friend…walk into my office and offer friendship…”?

The answer doesn’t really matter. I needed something and it seems to have appeared…but I do sit here wondering wondering wondering… (PS: I won’t be telling him on our first outing…“You know you are the answer to my prayers.”)

What do you think?

2

Co-inky-dink. The universe is funny that way.

3

There were probably other times (which you don’t remember) when someone randomly said a friendly thing to you, but you weren’t in the mood for companionship. In the two cases you do remember, it was you who filled in the other half of the equation by accepting the offer. You could just as easily have told them to go away.

4

Most of the replies you’ll get here are probably going to be “Calm down, it’s just a coincidence,” so I don’t want to be a buzzkill. I’ve definitely had experiences like that, and I’m not religious in the least. I don’t attribute any paranormal phenomenon to them, but it’s sometimes fun to think there’s some big friendly guy up there who’s knows a good story when he sees it and tries to make things work out for you. I don’t formally believe it’s true, but it’s a nice fantasy.

5

I’m going to give a variation of MLS’s answer. The act of asking makes you more likely to give a positive response to an existing answer. Nothing wrong with that at all. Just a little reminder to ask for what you want.

6

You are at one with the Tao. Quick, go buy a lottery ticket.

7

Confirmation bias.

8

Not only that, but most of us are surprisingly unaware of how we’re presenting ourselves at any given moment. If he wanted companionship he could have very easily been wearing an open face and projecting a mood that translated, either consciously or subconsciously, to a big honking sign saying “TALK TO ME, I WANNA BE YOUR FRIEND!”

9

Francis Bacon, Novum Organum, Chapter I, XLVI

10

Well, I’ve been sitting around thinking the same thing, but no friends have popped into my life, I’m afraid…

11

Jerry needs to clean the database, all prayer requests are restricted to titles, until posting is disabled at least. We apologize of any inconvenience this may cause you.

You see… long, long ago Cecil Adams and God made a bet on who could stay on the same server and software the longest…

12

The OP is not too far from what I was asking in my very first post to the Dope. Since you’ve also brought it up, I’ll go ahead and come a little further out of the closet.

I’ve had a number of experiences with meaningful coincidences. Once you start looking for these things, you can find them. Confirmation bias, wishful thinking, and priming often come into play. I can see why so many people attribute these seemingly paranormal events to a god or other favored supernatural explanation, but I haven’t come to any such conclusions myself.

Some of the coincidences are manufactured – I don’t know how common it is, but I’ve seen people who go “fishing” for believers by saying weird stuff and then following it up with cold reading techniques. One former astrologer/palm reader I met admitted as much to me (albeit in an “IF I did it, here’s how” kinda way).

Then there are those very rare meaningful coincidences that have defied the usual explanations. The sort of things that, if they had occurred in a movie, would have you nodding to yourself that you knew exactly what the director was intending to convey by that scene.

Maybe it is just coincidental, without any meaning beyond my own perception, but I can definitely point to a few events that call for some other explanation. I don’t know what the mechanism could be, but it makes me wonder.

It’s kinda nice to know I’m not alone, though.

13

I think, possibly, you had many opportunities for friendship you did not see and were not receptive to, but your prayer put you in the frame of mind to read the friendship signal loud and clear in both cases.

Believe me, I understand what you’re talking about. Sometimes I feel my marriage could only exist due to divine intervention. With each passing year, as I assert more and more control over the direction of my life, I feel connected to the Universe in a big way, almost to the point I might call it god.

But feelings are not, and never were, very rational.
Besides, shouldn’t we give ourselves a bit of credit for the choices we make?

In They Gay Science Nietzsche wrote

Think about it. Maybe mankind invents god because we struggle to understand the magnitude of our own potential for greatness. Imagine what we might accomplish if we stopped waiting around for a god to intervene.

You needed a friend, and you found one.

You don’t have to consider it divine intervention to feel gratitude. Existence is no less miraculous without a creator. In fact, it’s kind of more so.

14

You must feel like a total yutz for not asking for 10 friends, a billion dollars, and your very own Swedish bikini team.

15

If you haven’t read Illusions: The Adventures of a Reluctant Messiah, by Richard Bach, I think you would enjoy it. Just try not to take it too seriously.

16

It wasn’t divinity or coincidence, it was you, and I say this as a Christian. Recognizing your need made you more receptive towards people who were able to fill it. When they work “sending out positive energy into the universe,” (where does my friend get that, The Secret or something?) and prayer for things like self-improvement/ improvement of their state both work largely because the individual is self-aware enough to realize what they need and are willing, if not consciously, to take appropriate steps towards their goals.

Like when someone tells you something like: “I was down on my luck after losing my job, and things were getting really bad. They were going to turn off my power, the house was a heartbeat from foreclosure, and I didn’t know what to do. So I got down on my knees and prayed ‘God, let my next interview go well so I can lift myself up out of this misery.’ I went in there the next day, and I got that job. Praise Jesus.” Do you assume God listened to him and heard his prayers, or that he presented himself to his utmost ability during the interview? Maybe it’s a mixture of both, but there’s has to be a lot of the latter at the very least. As Ben Franklin said, “God helps those who help themselves.”

17

Yes, sadly this is all it is.

We all have moments when we wish for something.
If we get it, it’s … amazing :cool: and we remember it.
If nothing happens (as per usual) we forget about making the wish.

However, as others have said, if you are open to new friends then you are slightly more likely to make one.
Imagine someone looking in and seeing you cheerful, optimistic and determined. they may well strike up a conversation.
If they see you depressed, pessimistic and listless, they’ll probably go elsewhere.