Cecil Adams; is he living or dead?

Factual Questions
1

Okay, I have been unable to succeed in successfully answering this question.
See, if you look in the archives, the answers are started out by saying “CECIL REPLIES”. Now if you look at the recent questions, they are addressed to the person who wrote the Q in. Or they say something about a sd “manager” writing the reply. This brings me to my question, Has cecil adams passed on yet? I would like to get info as soon as possible! It seems to be a senseless question, but i am a straight dope newcomer and im only 12! thanx for the help!
sincerely,
Timorous in tennessee (lol)

2

Twelve is too young to register here, I believe (no junior modding, implied or otherwise).
Cecil Adams does not exist and never did. An editor writes “Cecil’s” columns. A quite colorful stretch in my tenure here revealed that fact.

3

Dear Editor—

I am 12 years old. Some of my little friends say there is no Cecil. Papa says, “If you see it in The Chicago Reader, it’s so.” Please tell me the truth, is there a Cecil?

SHAKINTHERIM

(apologies to Virginia O’Hanlon)

:slight_smile:

4

Yes, SHAKINTERIM, there is a Cecil. In all of the ignorance you dispell, there is a Cecil. When someone says a duck’s quack doesn’t echo and you send them the link, there is Cecil. :smiley:

5

I really thought there was a cecil… just like santa or batman… but I guess people with that kind of names is never real.

6

There really was a Cecil.

Cecil passed away on the crapper back in the seventies. Officially, the cause of death was ‘heart attack’, but most attribute his fast paced lifestyle, obesity and drug use as leading factors.

He is probably best know for…

Wait…

I’m thinking of Elvis.

But now that you mention it, I always assumed that Cecil was a flesh and blood human, like you, I or Elvis.

Ooh, I feel a quest comming on…

BBL!

7

OK, I know who he is now.

I’d tell you, but after finding out, well, it’s not my place to do so.

I must say, I wish I were still unaware of the truth.

8

Christ, you guys have short memories; Cecil just posted here less than a month ago..

9

That is just Ed Freakin’ Zotti, man. No disrespect intended. :wink:

10

Please tell me you’re lying.

Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny I could handle… but no Cecil?

I’ll have to start believing in the Bilderberg Group and the Z.O.G…

11

Cecil Adams doesn’t exist.

Neither does Ilsa Lund. Or Little Nemo.

Which raises the issue of how these people wrote the words you have read.

One possibility is that everything was written by Francis Bacon. Another, more likely one, is that there really is an individual known as Cecil Adams who writes the column and posts ascribed to him, in the same manner that there is an individual known as Ilsa Lund and an individual known as Little Nemo writing the words ascribed to them.

12

Cecil is dead. I saw him die myself, as the helicopters took off. No one could survive an explosion like that. No one.
:::thinks to himself:::

Yes, of course Cecil is dead.

:::thinks some more:::

OR IS HE?

13

No, this is Ed Zotti (‘Freakin’ is his wrestling name, I think). As we all know, mods make quick work of anyone who tries to post under two different screen names. Keep up with this “Cecil doesn’t exist” conspiracy stuff, and some people just might have to start questioning your judgement, Ilsa.

14

Wasn’t he part of that dynamic duo of the Fifties, Beanie and Cecil?

:smiley:

15

Each week, there is a new column by Cecil, two new columns written by staff members, and one or two old columns by Cecil being re-run. The new columns come out on Friday; you can always recognize them because they’re the ones with a Slug Signorino illustration on the front page. Speculation abounds as to who actually writes the columns under the name “Cecil Adams”, but I’ve never seen any reason to belive that it’s not the same guy who’s been writing them for years.

16

Wow, pcroughn, your quest was successful? Even though it lasted only 23 minutes? That must’ve been some whirlwind of discovery!

17

  1. We have a lower age limit of 13 for a reason. I have accordingly banned the OP for a couple of years.

  2. Cecil is alive. Doubt him at your own risk, but stay away from ME if you must doubt. I am severely allergic to thunderbolts. Or at least being on the receiving end of thunderbolts, I don’t mind tossing out a few myself.

Lynn
For the Straight Dope

18

“How did they create those posthumous Cecil Adams columns?”

:rolleyes:

19

I think it’s an acronym:

CECIL ADAMS=Chicago Editors Collaborate In Lassoing Answers; Dumb-Ass Members Smile.

20

Which allows us to finally settle all arguments with “Cecil…if he’s prepared.”