During the Biden years (when renewables and demand-side energy management were still “hot” and politically acceptable), I worked for a Fortune 500 company working on just such a product. It could talk to some devices via APIs, or would switch others on/off via simple pulse width modulation, turning them on and off as needed. It wouldn’t meet EVERY use case, but the goal was to make it usable for many types of households.
That company wasn’t the first, either — I had worked with something similar to that a decade prior (in fact I think that company was bought out by the one I ended up working for, years later). The effort is still ongoing, I think, but post-Trump and post-COVID interest rates, the team suffered a ton of layoffs and cutbacks and it’s just barely petering along now. US renewables and energy management is a wee little boat caught in the political tides (or tsunamis, these days). The technical difficulties are complex but solvable. The political? Forget it.
It depends on the particulars. Some are retrofits that work with existing devices (some/many, but never all, of them). Some are meant for new constructions only.
The way these things usually work is that some state or county tries it out on an experimental basis, then maybe rolls it out into a new regulation in zoning law, then maybe years later retroactively applies it to some subset of existing households, then enough residents push back and stall the effort and eventually the federal government becomes Republican again and it all goes away anyway, only to restart the cycle with the next blue admin. It’s usually like one step forward three steps back in that regard, which is bad for the environment but good for homeowners who don’t want to change.
We just don’t really have the collectivist culture here to effectively do something like this at the community scale. “My house, my rules” is the norm and people don’t like their energy needs being rationed or limited to particular times of day. It takes a lot of political pushing (or consistent grid failures) for something like that to get implemented.
I’d say generally speaking, existing households and appliances are grandfathered in, but the next time you need to replace it, remodel, add solar, add an ADU, change to a different electrical utility or plan, or something similar… that’s when the new rules tend to get you, and they’re almost always less favorable to the homeowner / electricity consumer.
Energy policy is something that affects every citizen every day, but isn’t sexy enough for any politician to really talk about, much less for voters to study or care about enough. I don’t think this will change as long as the US military remains strong enough to guarantee a steady flow of energy and fossil fuels remain cheap enough that electricity pricing is more or less an afterthought. Were that not the case, we’d probably end up more like Europe (where things like air conditioning are taken a lot less for granted and heating systems are typically more efficient than just burning fossil fuels for resistive heat).