I had the misfortune of catching parts of Charlie’s Angel’s II on TV last night, Thursday generally being “must-avoid” TV on most channels. I’m not normally that critical of popcorn movies, but even giving it half my attention, it was clear that this was one of the most ineptly made large-dollar pictures ever.
It’s rare that you watch a movie and wonder if the director got his experience doing high school plays. The special effects were laughably bad, even if you accept that Charlie’s Angels should be using Crouching Tiger style wire effects. (The writers of the movie were apparently under the impression that the Angels were superheroines rather than mere mortals. Then again, they were also apparently under the impression that Kevlar vests would protect you from falling fifty feet from the top of a building.) In a few cases, it would have been more convincing if they’d left the blue screen there.
It was a really bad choice to pick a villianess who was much hotter than any of the Angels. Cameron Diaz and Drew Barrymore both looked terrible. Bosley was black. Not canon, but not a big problem. But he was a terrible actor. That was a problem. But his acting was on a par with everyone else in the movie. Even bigger problem.
I actually very much enjoyed the first Charlie’s Angels movie, but I agree about the the sequel. Horribly bad movie. Unfortunately, and inexplicably, my fiance likes it so I got to watch much of it last night as well.
Finagle: I couldn’t, couldn’t, couldn’t possibly agree with you more. It was bad enough to almost be confusing. In fact, just you mentioning this gave me a seizure. Yes. This is the most inept, stupidest, mind-boggling big money picture I’ve ever seen. Armageddon surrenders.
Exactly. It was not supposed to be a realistic looking action/thriller with a deep plot (go see a Tom Clancy flick if you want that). It was more like a live-action over the top cartoon with a story line no deeper than a scooby-doo mystery. Just a lot of fast paced scenes strung together in music video like editing. I found it to be a lot of fun. Just watching the beyond-belief things made me laugh out loud and I never got bored (i.e. helicopter and girls fall off a damn and they climb into the thing and start it up while it’s falling. Or moto-cross jumps while flipping upside down and shooting a gun.)
I don’t think it ever attempted to be more than that.
I think “inept” is the perfect word- ineptitude is what makes a bad movie really awful, and this thing had it in spades. Not just bad, but stunningly bad writing, acting, effects, plotting, everything. The most inept movie ever? No, it’s not even close to it. But it was surprisingly bad, and maybe it’s up there in the big budget category. When a friend dragged me into it, I figured it would be lame. But I didn’t think it would look and sound like it was written and filmed over a single weekend.
While watching this, I remember thinking it was shit, but not thinking it was the absolute worst piece of shit I had ever seen- maybe it’s time for a reassessment…
What, no mention of Battlefield Earth? The movie where every scene change is a curtain wipe and the camera couldn’t be mounted level if John Travolta’s life depended on it?
The two scenes that did it in for me was one of the bad guys walking right through twenty foot high flames and emerging with not even a singed eyebrow, and the Angels swinging from some wires attached to the top of a building towards the end of the movie.
That second part wouldn’t have been bad if all they did was swing from them to another building, or to the ground…but apparantly these were magic wires that allowed them to swing in any direction and with NO regard for momentum.
It’s a cartoon – the angels are supposed to be super-human. I enjoyed it very much. Excellent stunt work and effects, great eye-candy, and a lot of fun overall. I do agree that it’s not as good as the first movie, but it’s not more stupid and unrealistic.
This movie was horrible. After reading this thread and seeing that some that disagree, I may have to start asking potential friends their opinions of the film. Of all the absurdity, I think the worst was everything that happened in the car scene at the end with all of the angels hanging on to the vehicle. I think over the top action scenes can work decently when surrounded with well done humorous or emotional scenes (see the first CA or King Kong), but this did neither. Demi looked great, though.
But even as a cartoon, it wasn’t * technically * very good. The wire stunts looked like wire stunts and the background was so poorly done that it was jarring. The editing and direction was terrible. As I said, I don’t usually notice technical flaws in movies but these were just bad.
If I were a more serious film critic, I’d probably argue that the cartoony stunt elements were incongruous with the original TV series which, while far from realistic, wasn’t completely ludicrous. (Evil villainess gliding from the building in a small, diaphanous evening throw fer example or jumping from a 20 foot high window and throwing in a totally gratuitous mid air flip.)
But really, they lost me when they ripped off (and insulted the memory of) Raiders of the Lost Ark and Goldeneye) in a leaden and embarassingly clunky opening sequence.
This was a direct wink to Terminator, and wasn’t meant to be serious at all.
On the other hand, the intro where the Angels invade a Tibetan terrorist organization by infiltrating the electric bull riding gambling ring was based on actual events.
I certainly won’t defend Charlie’s Angels as a great film (it’s a forgettable popcorn movie), but it was definitely competently made. The whole point was to give flashy special effects and to hell with trying to be “realistic” (a value that is grossly overrated). I would have little respect for anyone who is bothered by the absurdity of it. That was the entire point, and objecting to it is a sign of a total lack of any sense of fun.
Battlefield Earth – that’s inept. Mitchell – that’s inept, too (the only movie so bad that MST3K couldn’t make it entertaining). Ring of Terror – yup. Charlie’s Angels: Full Throttle – dumb, certainly, but competently made.
