Chasing my tail and biting it off

The BBQ Pit
1

My experience as a government employee led me to an epiphany today!

As a working physician, when I want a patient to get a non-urgent consultation, I fill out a request to send to our medical director. There the request is reviewed, and held up to diagnostic criteria to see if the request should be denied or upheld. It’s a cost-saving measure, and ideally should help us working physicians to better manage our own patients more effectively. But in practice, it can be a game of guessing and second guessing to try to get the request approved.

This week the medical director was on vacation, so I was asked to go to the main office, and review outstanding consultation requests, to approve or deny. At the main office, we actually have copies of the diagnostic criteria used to make the “approve or deny” decision. These had been withheld from the physicians actually doing the work as the volumes containing the info are expensive, and it would be a copyright infringement to just photocopy them and distribute them to us working docs.

The standing joke among my staff was that I was going to the head office to approve my own requests.

I plowed thru about 20 referral requests, using the criteria and medical knowledge to either approve or deny my colleague’s requests for consultations.

I got to the second-to-last one. It was from me! But now I had the diagnostic criteria in front of me! I’d covered 4 of the 5 pre-requisite points to justify a consult, but I’d missed one!

So I was forced to deny my own request, and send it back to me, with directions for further testing and resubmission after that was complete.

:eek: :confused: :rolleyes: :smack: :wally

2

Ya gotta love the system!

:smiley:

3

That’s gotta hurt!:eek:

4

Gotta love bureaucracy…

5

So if the request is denied a second time, this time by the medical director (after returning from vacation), then what?

:smiley:

6

Obviously you should fire the doctor who submitted a request while meeting only 80% of the requirements.

It’s the only way he’ll learn.

7

It’s nice to know you didn’t let yourself succomb to the temptation to bribe…umm…yourself, or something.

8

Do you think you might have approved it if you offered yourself sexual favors?

9

Note to self: Rewrite note to self.

10

Make sure to harbour a deep-seated resentment to the medical director pro tempore. Perhaps slash his tires, or key his car.

Oh, you’ll get him, and his little dog, too.

11

I offered them, I accepted said favors, but I still disallowed the request.

I must state that a definite “quid pro quo” statement about said favors was never made.

Plausible deniability! :smiley:

12

Too late, you already made audiotapes of the encounter. You could erase the incriminating part, but that would leave a suspicious 18.5-minute gap.

Plus there’s the matter of the semen-stained dress…

13

Qadgop wears dresses to work? Never would have known.

14

Even if you never do any of those things, he’s got to be feeling nervous.

After all, you know where he lives.

15

Did you fill out the 27B-6 form?*

*points awarded for the poster that catches the referencs.

16

Brazil? (What can I use my points for? A new car?)

17

Yes! Your points are usable for smoochez from your friendly neighborhoos Binarydrone.

18

I curse that the s key is next to the d key! :mad:

19

Hmmm. Not sure how tempting I find that offer. (Binarydrone is not a name that readily lends itself to gender identification, you know.)

20

Yes, but if you felt pressured by yourself to offer said favors to yourself, I think you have serious grounds for a harassment suit.

Take the SOB for everything he’s got!