Relax, Ed – may I call you Ed? I didn’t delude myself that you were hitting on me. I’m just one of the many women of the millenium age who don’t particularly care for “babe.” You know us crazy “modern” girls – smoking cigarettes, driving cars, working, for God’s sake. That’s what you get for giving us the vote. 
straightdope.org is available. Why not use that?
handy: as I’ve already said, it isn’t as simple as just doing a word-replace. I have to make sure no graphics contain the words, no links come here, and I have to modify server-side scripting, templates, and data files in addition to pages.
That said, if I wanted to just do a simple word-replace, UDD could write a tcl script in about 30 seconds flat to do that.
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O p a l C a t
www.opalcat.com
Wow, someone has serious comprehension problems with causality here.
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O p a l C a t
www.opalcat.com
Let me introduce myself formally to this fun group. I am not a legal department. I am not even a lawyer. I am not the powers that be or the venal corporate oppressor. I’m just the guy who was Cecil’s first editor, and now one of my responsibilities is to protect the Straight Dope’s interests and reputation. I am also, in Opal’s charming phraseology, THAT GUY who is HIGHER UP THE PISSING POLE than Ed, the perpetrator of the ugly note you’ve all been abuzz about. Evidently I made a big mistake when I asked Opal to refrain from using our name for her email service “or anywhere else.” So let me put it on the record officially: I was not asking Opal to take down her Teeming Millions Home Page. I was not trying to tell her that she was forbidden from using the words “Straight Dope.” Indeed, I would have no right or legal standing to do that, as even a complete moron would realize after thinking about it for about 30 seconds. Can Coca-Cola forbid someone from writing their name? Of course not. They can’t even forbid Pepsi from using it on TV commercials. Around the Reader we like to flatter ourselves that Straight Dope readers are an unusually intelligent and discriminating bunch, but you guys are making me wonder.
The reason I said “or anywhere else” is that, as Ed has pointed out, we’ve been down this road with Opal before. She’s the sort of person who, after you ask her not to use the words “Straight Dope” in the title of her home page, turns around and uses “str8dope” as the name of her email service. I wanted to make it clear that we object to ANY appropriation of our name, lest we have the same problem next month with “StrateDope” or StraitDope.”
Why do we object to someone else using the name? For all the reasons that have been brought up here, plus one big one that has not: we think Cecil has an excellent reputation for intelligence and accuracy. He and his staff and editors at the Reader all spend a lot of time and energy making sure his columns are as authoritative and accurate as they can be. We don’t want other people – ANY other people – using the name, because we cannot control the accuracy or intelligence of what they say, and we don’t want readers thinking that stupid or inaccurate material is coming from Cecil. Similarly, we don’t want people getting mail with a return address of str8dope, because they might think it’s coming from us. And we don’t want people searching for the Straight Dope on the Web and landing on a site that we have nothing to do with. This is why we have no interest in licensing the name either – the license would imply some sort of quality control that did not and could not exist.
But I repeat – and this is the official word from high up on the pissing pole - we do not and never did want Opal to take down her site or to remove from it any mention of our trademarked name. What we object to is use of “The Straight Dope” or “Cecil Adams” (and close approximations thereof) in a way that might cause confusion about the origin of a Web page, mail service, book, column, radio show, or any other work or service. As far as we’re concerned, Opal can put her page back up tomorrow and she can refer to the Straight Dope all she wants. But don’t be surprised if she doesn’t – I think she’s having too much fun being the center of attention.
If you had been paying more attention, you would have noticed that the page went back up in the wee hours of last night. Go back where you came from, knuckle-dragger.
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O p a l C a t
www.opalcat.com
…and thank god for that, OpalCat. It’s a great site, and I dreaded Teeming without it.
JMcC, San Francisco
http://members.tripod.com/~weirdstuff/index.html
“Hear the voices in my head, I swear to God it sounds like they’re snoring”
Psst… Hey, Opal…
I’ve gone on record that I love you, and am always suspicious of the powers that be in this joint.
That said, I think you are getting a WEE BIT… what’s the word that will sum up my feelings and not make you hate me… overwrought?
Why don’t you relax, ask Ed point blank what exactly he wants tyou to do, and do it. From Ed’s responses, I’m willing to wager that eliminating every Straight Dope reference on your board is not necessarry at all.
Yer pal,
Satan
Oh great… There I go posting without actually READING or anything…
sigh It’s late. I’m having a lousy week. Please, please PLEASE do not hate me because I’ an idiot…
::slinking away::
Yer pal,
Satan
Thank you, Mike Lenehan, for letting us know where things stand. I hope events have stabilized now, and you won’t be dragged into any more petty disputes. The Straight Dope Message Board is by far my favorite place on the 'net, and my one fear is that, because of having to endure all this useless ankle-biting, you and Ed might someday decide its not worth all the hassle merely for doing a good job.
Helping to bring Unca Cece into this world might not be the same as Athena springing from your forehead, but it is a close second.
Good work, Opal. You’re a peach.
See, Satan, your love life’s improving already. Buck up, man.
And the problem with small furry animals
in corners is that, just occasionally,
one of them’s a mongoose.
Terry Pratchett, Witches Abroad
Mike
Lenehan, I think thats nice of you to spend that time to clarify your position. I wish others would do that.
Other than that, if you really want to watch your TM, I’d think you would spend the $70 & register straightdope.org
Mike:
Thank you for your reply and clarification. Now, that’s much better public relations.
Plunging like stones from a slingshot on Mars.
Thanks for bringing these to our attention. We are on the case.
Actually, I’m a bit of a dab hand at causality, but in this case it’s irrelevant. Show me the utility of hurling insults at someone you apparently want to maintain a professional or quasi-professional relationship with – that’s the part I’m having “comprehension problems” with. As for the “he started it!” part – who gives a shit who started it? The question is how to fix it. If it has in fact been fixed, hurray.
Jodi, it’s called self-destructive behaviour, when someone acts against their own self interests. Happens a lot, especially with children rebelling against their parents, frinstance. Or with people who get lawyers involved in trivial matters. Or in divorce situations, where the drive to hurt the other party outweighs the desire for self-improvement.
Drives the economic determinalists crazy.
This is the third case of outrage against the powers that be which has been attempted to be publicly tried in order to generate antipathy against the evil authority of this board (that I’m aware of since I’ve been here).
Each case shows that Ed might not be perfect, but he’s reasonable, non-evil, and in the right.
Please, everyone, remember this the next time someone wants to alert you to how grossly unfair they’ve been treated by the powers here.
Ed, just remember, this is good training for parenting a teen. 
Peace.
Ed can call me “babe” anytime. Though I don’t smoke cigarettes, so guess I’m not much of a feminist anyway!
Jill