Chicago - The City That Sort of Works

The BBQ Pit
1

As many know, I am on the job hunt and in the meantime, I’ve been temping for about eight months. I’ve seen dozens of different offices in all different sectors, and met all sorts of interesting characters that have made my life a real rich f-ing tapestry.

But this week is beginning to take the cake, and making me super angry at the same time. I guess I’m super naive, but right now I am simply fucking agog. For the next month, I am assigned to a State Sponsored Agency (I don’t want to say which one),working, I was told, in a ‘very fast paced, important office’. Having worked in non-profit before and enjoying the emotional fulfillment I got from doing non-profit work, I was excited to start up.

I arrived yesterday 10 minutes early and was told “no one was ready for me” because “we’re not really strict about coming in in the morning”.

After being introduced to two people in the twenty person office I was put in a cube and told to ‘wait’ until they had something for me to do. Yesterday I did exactly fifteen minutes of work, and that was filing about 100 pieces of paper. After finishing that filing, I asked my supervisor what was next. Her answer?

“If you finish things too fast around here, it makes people feel bad. You have to slow down with your work. Go wait in the cube.”

And there I waited. When I asked for information about the program to perhaps read and learn where I was working, the woman said “Why? You don’t have to know anything like that to work here.”

My assignment is to replace an executive assistant (my supervisor) to the vice president, starting on MONDAY. I have had ZERO training on anything in this office, I have no idea how to use the phone system, I’ve never seen the exec assistant’s desk, and I’ve been sitting in this cube since 8:30 and have done ONE thing: checking travel reimbursements for correct addition. The temp agency told me yesterday they’d call the HR department and make sure they ‘got a fire lit under them.’

Here it is. 10:00 a.m. and I’m listening to my walkman, posting to the boards and staring at the wall.

I have never EVER in my LIFE been in an office run less efficiently, and it’s SPONSORED and FUNDED entirely by the government. And you know what? It’s the highest paying temp job I’ve ever had.

2

Damn and here I’ve been beating my head against a wall trying to get a job where I would actually work! I gotta get me some of that there “working” :slight_smile:

3

Do you find this surprising? In my experience it’s a causal relationship.

4

In Might & Magic VI, the city offices are only open from 11 a.m. to 2 p.m.

The game must have been written by somebody from Chicago…

5

Well I WAS surprised. I’ve worked in other non profit offices and people are working their ASSES off, overtime, seven day weeks, really bustling.

I just watched a gang of women gather around a desk and help a woman tune in her radio for no less than ten minutes.

6

I have nothing to say about non-profits in general (and I’ve known some really good ones), just government sponsored programs. Again, it’s just my experience, but they are invariably screwed up.

7

Isn’t a government program essentially a non-profit?

8

You mean like the IRS?

Non-profits typically break even, right? Gov’t programs lose money every year.

Admonished for showing up on time and being too efficient? I’ve worked with lots of people who would be a much better fit there than you. Bring in some magazines or some crossword puzzle books or something tomorrow.

Haj

9

When an organization can just take people’s money to fund its operation, why should it bother producing anything of value? Just go with the flow, Jarbaby. If your company runs out of money, it can raise taxes.

10

Are they going to make you take a nap?

11

Those are the most feared words that a City worker can hear.

Just kidding. If you want, you can call me and I’ll tell you all about the wonderful effeciencies of Da City, how they’re making sure your tax dollars get well-spent in the budget.

Be aware though that there is a hiring freeze that’s not expected to lift any time soon so all new workers are, in effect, temps. I’m surprised that you’re getting paid though because in my experience, most of them are “interns” that are working for related agencies and, although theyr’e doing City work, they’re getting paid by their “original” employer, who has a contract with the city.

If you get along well with the ladies in the office, you can easily turn this into a nice job when (if) the freeze is lifted.

If you can live with yourself.

12

Clearly, this sort of thing only happens in Chicago.

13

My supervisor came in and said 'I totally forgot you were here today, I"m going to lunch." She’s still at lunch an hour and a half later.

14

This would make for an interesting news piece. You could even apply for whistleblower status…

“Rampant fraud, waste in Chicago city government. Story at 11.”

15

…and that’s why they call it “The Shitty That Works.”

16

Work intruded yesterday, and I don’t want Jarbabyj to think I rudely blew her off.

As others pointed out, there’s a significant difference between private-sector non-profits (charitable organizations and the like) and governmentally funded cash cows. The former typically do good work (although you still occasionally get crap like the United Way scandals) but the latter are generally useless. They have official purposes like employment programs or whatever, but the real reason for their existence is to provide lucrative jobs for the families and friends of politicians. It’s also a good way to work around civil service hiring freezes to get your buddies a paycheck.

We had a little scandal here a couple of years ago. The “director” of one of these taxpayer-money sinkholes realized that he wasn’t spending his budget fast enough through his regular means (coffee mugs, top-end sportswear with embroidered logos, leasing luxury vehicles for his family, selling his organization his used RV and sending a bunch of high school students on a cross-country summer tour in it, paying his wife kids to not show up and work, etc.) so he decided to just go ahead and embezzle the rest.

The sad thing is he probably would have gotten away with it if he wasn’t such an idiot.

17

Cleary, you have never worked in government before :wink: .

18

Today my supervisor came in and said “let’s agree to really start working at 10:00”

19

Wow, just wow. So, um…Chicago is about, what, 10-12 hours from Philadelphia? I could be there tomorrow…are they still taking on temps? Preferably in a cushy networking/computer support job? :wink:

20

Funny you should ask. My desk is covered in floppy disks that people shuttle back and forth. I asked, “can’t we just put these documents on a network drive and then everyone can use them”

:: pin drop::

“We don’t use that network drive. No one can figure that stuff out.”