As Chris DeBurgh put it in one of my favorite angsty anthems from my junior high days,
Let’s put 'em in a room together
And make them fight it out
'Til they see nothing from nothing
Will leave nothing at a-a-a-all…
(Anyone else remember this song? Anyone? Anyone? Sigh. Thought not.)
What if we teach the world to sing in perfect harmony? And then we buy them a Coke?
Surely that ought to solve something.
My way of solving all issues in the middle east: giving everyone air conditioning, porn, and booze.
“I was supposed to go blow myself up at the market today, but Sasha Grey has a new movie…and I’m kinda buzzed. Plus, it’s really really hot outside.”
Religion is stupid.
Better yet, make everyone in the Israeli-Palestinian conflict sit down and watch Mister Rogers until they all learn to get along. And tell them, “If you can’t share the Holy Land, NOBODY GETS IT!”
Pie fight.
I recommend dancing in the moonlight.
Well, it’ll solve Coca-Cola’s stock worries for the second quarter of '09, for sure!
Palestine gets to cut while Israel gets to choose.
“Let them eat cake !”
What I came into this thread to say. Utopian socialism, the most childishly stupid idea taken seriously (even now, in the 21st century) by hordes of supposedly grown-up people who ought to know better.
I’m having trouble parsing that sentence. Are you saying that sharing the wealth is a bad idea?
We’re quoting Hogfather.
Well, yes. If you are saying that wealth should simply be divided equally across the population, then that is a seriously bad idea. Any more discussion of this would probably take this thread badly off-topic, and would be better suited to GD or perhaps the Pit.
I just wanted to be clear on what you were saying.
And get them all hyped on caffeine? That’ll just make it worse!
Can we teach them to sing “Joy to the World?” Not the Xmas carol, but the Jeremiah was a bullfrog song?
Which is why they should use Vegemite.
Or Ovaltine.
Awesome.
During some errands a couple weeks ago, I overheard some store employees discussing the endless Senate race here in Minnesota. One argued very convincingly that it ought to be settled by a ladder match. Plus, we could put it on Pay-Per-View and make mucho revenue for the state.
There should be one pool of cars in every community that are owned by the town. People sign up for trips they want to take and when they get a carfull of people that all have the same destination, they can sign out the car and go on their trip. There, I’ve solved global warming.