Childhood Toys That TERRIFIED You

This. Big Lou. About four feet tall and scared the living bejeebers out of me when I got it for Hannukah as a kid. I hid it in my bedroom closet, which made it even scarier, especially as his eyes lit up.

What was your Nightmare Toy?

A two foot tall E.T. stuffed animal. I, too, would put him in my closet at night, but that somehow made it even worse. (shudder)

sock monkeys.

Cymbal Devil Monkey.

It was that horrible, thin-lipped skeletal grin and the BLOODSHOT (!), flames-of-hell yellow eyes that would pop in and out of the sockets when the thing was turned on. It was disturbing even in broad daylight. Brrr.

I was cool with Barbie dolls and babydolls, but dolls that were dressed up as Victorian women in all their finery scared the hell outta me.

Another troubling memory is my brother’s monsters. My dad used to wake us up to watch original Frankenstein, Werewolf, Dracula, Creature from the Black Lagoon, Mummy movies, etc. My brother built models of every monster known to cinema. He had these models on his windowsill. When the light hit them just right, they cast enormous shadows on the wall. I swear, they were going to kill us in our sleep.

My older sister had a toy clown that had somehow migrated to my bedroom. I kept it in the closet most of the time. Apparently my sister didn’t like it, either. Seeing a similar-looking clown attacking the boy in Poltergeist didn’t help calm my fears of clown toys.

There was a jack-in-the-box that I also hated because it, well, did what it was intended to do. That is until it broke somehow.

Omigod, I want a Dean Martin hand puppet!

One time I got this action figure thing for my son. I should have guessed it from where I got it, maybe it was because I always feared but laughed at clowns, maybe it was the old Asian guy or the frozen yogurt discount, but there was something wrong with that doll. Something even Grandpa noticed. He tried to warn me, but I didn’t listen. Maybe it was when the doll slowly twisted his neck around at me and screamed he was going to kill me (kill ME!), and then tried to with this knife he had; but somehow I realized that doll was evil.

Rock 'em Sock 'em Robots.
I pinched a finger pushing the head down one time, and I was afraid of it ever since.

Anything that was a clown. :eek:

::shudder::

A very loud mechanical train with flashing lights. I have a vivid memory of it jerking around the kitchen while my brother and I screamed and tried to climb up the cabinets, and my mother laughing.

Remember that scene from Poltergeist where the kid’s clown is sitting on the chair, and when he looks back again it’s gone?

Oh my dear God.:eek:

I see y’all do remember that scene!

I don’t remember what terrified me, but my sister would go apoplectic over this caliope thing with balloons attached to it.

And now her daughter is absolutely paralyzed with fear when faced with one of those vibrating balls with cushy spikes on them, or a children’s Red Devil vacuum cleaner. Hehehehehehe.

So, does one wear the Dean Martin puppet on your hand while hoisting martinis, or what? Anyway, Eve, he looks more like Jerry Lewis than Dean Martin to me.

I am still freaked out by Zippy Monkeys.

Imagine that thing loping at you (with its perpetually crooked feet) in a dark alley.

::SHUDDER::

That Zippy Monkey is just evil. I had to avert my eyes!

I had a bank shaped like an apple, in which you would place the coin on the exposed flat surface of the apple and then this worm would jump out of the apple at light speed and grab the coin and pull it into the bank. Holy cow that thing was scary.

But nothing, and I mean nothing caused more fear, embarrassment and emotional scarring that the most evil of children-oriented merchandise, Captain Zoom. I never met the guy, never cared to, but somehow he knew my name and when my birthday was and he was COMING!!! No really, he lives on the moon and he explicitly states that he is coming to Earth for the sole purpose of singing me a tune. A being with sufficient technology to just jaunt across 384,400 km that easily…and he chooses to use it to prey on small children?!? WTF!?!

Not so much a toy, but Darth Vader scared the bejesus out of me.

When I was a rugrat I was terrified of rubber halloween masks. Not the cheapo k-mart plastic masks with the rubber bands. The REAL looking, creepy, ghoul masks. Freaked my shit!!!

And balloons.
I was a strange child.

Teddy Ruxpin. I thought that creepy animatronic bear was going to come off the shelves and get me when I was little.