How is the poor kid supposed to learn how to behave correctly with a mother like THAT?
Like AudreyLevins, I would have laughed at first, and then prepared myself to respond kindly and lightly to the mother’s forthcoming apology.
When I realized that no apology was forthcoming, then I’d be pissed. But by then I would have laughed and she’d be thinking that I was OK with the whole thing, so I don’t know what I’d do.
Jeez, when I was little, my family took me to plenty of buffets, but only the kind where you point out what you want and somebody else dishes it up for you.
Is anyone else having a Helen Keller moment?
I was at a rather pricey buffet with my sisters-in-law. We were seated near the fruit table. A large family was having some sort of to-do. There were a couple dozen of 'em. Anyhoo, these two little 4-5 year-old kids (who looked and behaved like they were raised by wolves) walked up to the fruit table and proceeded to LICK every piece of fruit and put them back.
We designated ourselves the “Fruit Table Police” and told each unsuspecting diner to take a pass. The horror…
MamaT, a similar incident (although not as personal-space-invading as my own dinner plate) happened to me at the grocery store. A woman in line behind me with two small girls, I’m guessing 4 and 6 years old. One of the girls pulled something right out of my cart. My first instinct was Hey!, second was to laugh. (It is Funny - kids are funny, you’ve got to admit) THEN I looked at the mother, and she was TOTALLY embarassed and she apologized profusely, then she told her child, “That’s not your cart, you dont take things from other people’s cart.” The child was suitably embarassed and I’m sure she’ll NEVER go near someone else’s cart again anytime soon.
My parents didnt take us all out to dinner anywhere until they were convinced we wouldn’t embarass them. I believe I was 6, and my sisters were 9 and 10. (My sisters had gone with them a few times already, but age 6 was MY first time) It was 20 years ago, but we sat through that dinner in FEAR of screwing up, because they had ingrained in us that it was a privelege to go out with them, and that if you’re going around grown-ups, you’ll behave like a grown up and not like a little heathen. Sure, it’s convenient and easier to just drag your kids with you anywhere, but that don’t mean it’s OK.
And another pet peeve, off topic, but about unruly kids: does no one explain to kids anymore what “grown-ups are talking” means? I can’t stand it when I’m over at someone’s house, and their kid is in the middle of the room, all night long, interrupting and talking over ANYONE. Even their own parent! Loudly banging things around, getting in everyone’s face: “Look! Look! Look what I did!!” Ok that’s cute for a 0-2 year old, but when you’re 6, get outta here, I’m sorry.
Wa-wa.
I have a 5 yr old and he knows how to behave when we’re out. My 2 yr old would probably try and strike up a conversation with you, but lord knows they know not to take food from your plate. They even know to ask politley (please and thank you) when they want something. It’s really not that hard to teach manners to your children people. And I can’t believe the gall of the mother to not be embarassed or appologize! Horrible, just horrible.
Rude parents beget rude kids. Not the kids’ fault. But these are the kids who wonder why nobody likes them 
Poor kids. Now if we required a parenting license…
Well, let’s see. This was casino buffet on the Mississippi Gulf Coast that appears to be popular with local families because it’s reasonably priced (and it does have quite good food, especially seafood – really fresh seafood, the guy preparing the barbecue shrimp was being held up on fixing the next batch until the kitchen staff got the fresh shrimp peeled for him), and it was a blond-haired, blue-eyed child, Sparrow, so I doubt there was any cultural angle besides the Culture of the Spoiled Rotten Bratty Child[supTM[/sup].
There were lots of other kids at the buffet that evening, but most of them were pretty well-behaved, either accompanied by parents or older siblings when they went near the food.
Nope, it was just a brat with a clueless mother. Papa Tiger decided it wasn’t worth talking to a manager, but if the kid had approached him again, I suspect we would have. My children certainly knew better than to take food off ANYONE’S plate by the age of 5, even their own family’s, and there’s no reason a 5-year-old can’t be taught simple manners! We’re not talking dining with the Queen here!
Having worked at one of those buffet-style restaurants in high school, I can’t say I’m surprised. The things I saw adults doing include dropping a utensil on the floor and then sticking it back in the food (if I couldn’t intercept it in time, I’d grab the whole container of food, remove the dirty item and what I judged to be enough food from around the area, replace with a clean utensil, and put it back), putting their hands in the food - even reaching around/through utensils to do this - and taking what they wanted that way, and nearly starting a fist fight in the line to the buffet on Mother’s Day.
Pfft, amateur. Seeing how it was a sausage that the little snot was grabbing, I would’ve exclaimed in a loud firm voice:
“Kid, didn’t your mother ever teach you to keep your hands off other people’s weiners?”
I’m sure the “mother” wouldn’t be nearly as shamed as she should be, but I do these things for my own amusement.
At 5, that kid should damn well know not to take food off of anothers plate. But, even accepting the kid was confused, which happens to 5 year olds, the mom should have stepped in and appologized and told the kid what they did wrong. If mom appologizes, it turns into a funny, cute confused kid story. Mom walks away, it turns into a rude asshole and their stupid offspring story.
I would like to think the mother was hugely embarrassed and not acting like a cave-dwelling troll.
I would like to think that.
I would have had no problem embarrassing the child by saying something to him. Recently I was in the waiting room of a hospital and a young boy went out of his way to stomp on my purse, which was on the floor. I moved it out of the way, and he brightly asked, “Whatcha doin’?”
“I’m moving my purse that you stepped on,” I said firmly. He slunk off and I never saw him again.
I think a lot of the time we are afraid to say something because it’s not our child. I remember once I was behind a woman at a checkout counter of a grocery store. She was busy unloading her cart, while her toddler was standing up in the cart seat, and none too steadily. I grabbed him and set him down in the cart seat, saying something like, “Careful, sweetie, you’re going to fall.” The woman was very appreciative that I had caught him.
I’m sorry, but if some parents won’t rein in their children in public, I will. Especially if they’re causing a nuisance or putting themselves in danger.
I think you’re onto something, ivylass. I know that even in the home of a friend, I have a problem correcting a child’s behavior. I think my fear (as a childless-by-choice person who thinks that people who do have kids are braver and more mighty than Xena), is that I’ll cross some boundary that the parents in question have established: “We never issue commands with Johnny–instead we phrase it as a request, such as, ‘Could you please stop licking my shoe?’ And actually, we do allow him to lick our shoes. It seems to calm him.”*
It kind of doesn’t matter whether or not I think the kid should be allowed to lick shoes; I’m more inclined to give complete deference to the parents, and assume that whatever the kid is doing is allowed by them, and who am I to impose my child-rearing beliefs, when I don’t ever plan to have kids?
(Ironically, I don’t, as the “mama” of 3 dogs, have any problem correcting–or praising, as the case may be–the behavior of other people’s dogs. I have no problem imposing my dog-training beliefs on anyone.)
Now, I will step in if the kid is doing something REALLY dangerous, like walking out of the grocery store while his mother (who probably thinks he’s still right next to her) is digging around in her purse for coupons or something. If he were, as in ivylass’s example, standing up in the cart, I’d probably call, “Be careful!” really loudly to get the mother’s attention, and ready myself to catch him if I don’t get it in time.
- Note: I don’t actually know anyone whose kid licks shoes–it’s just an example.
Although I’ve never been brave enough to follow suit, I did have a friend that had no problems grabbing children that ran amock in restaurants and loudly proclaiming “Does anyone claim this creature before I call the pound?”
Aaaaah, children.
Not too long ago, I went to see my doctor to get my Zoloft refilled. This means I have to go to OSU’s psycho-neurosis-whatchawhoever to see a doctor, then get a prescription.
A lady came in with three children, all of them looked to be about 5 or 6 years old. . . While she was at the check-in desk, the kids came over to the waiting area and started playing with the toys behind me. Next thing I know, the little girl is going “Johnny, stop it… Johnny, stop it… Johnny, stop it…” and the mom can’t see them or hear them. I turn around, and Johnny is choking the crap out of this little girl! I kinda gave him an odd look, and he quit, but then he was staring at me. Came around in front of my chair and just stood and watched me. Just standing and staring. Finally, he runs by and kicks me in the leg!
I gave him my best crazy woman look and he went about his business.
You know, there have been a lot of great snappy comebacks, but poor Papa Tiger was so stunned that he didn’t react until the kid had run off. So his next best option was to speak to the mother. Personally, I would have been a lot nastier to her, but then I’m a mother, too.
It’s a shame the snappy comebacks usually don’t occur until it’s too late to deliver them!
You forgot the muzzle.
I **LOVE{/B] that idea! Hmmm, wonder where I can get some made up. Plenty of unruly kids around here.
Hm.
Seems to me that the main reason one does not wish one’s children to do this is because the parents are embarrassed.
And if the parents are NOT embarrassed, I would make it a personal mission for the next few minutes of my life to MAKE them embarrassed.
(“Hey, folks, meet the Mother Of The Great Pig Of The Universe! Yeah! How’s it goin’? She’ll be here all week, folks, so give her a BIG hand!”)