One more for just assuming they are from the South. My cousin’s children refer to her as “ma’am” and their dad as “sir”. They are great parents.
I’d just assume they were foreigners. I’ve never heard anyone address their parents as ‘sir’ and ‘madam’ in Ontario.
At the pool today I watch a mother ask a question of her 9 year old son. His answer was “yes” and about three women around him said “ma’am” - it wasn’t ugly but it is a “done thing” around here. I expect my sons to refer to adults as sir or ma’am. It is up to the adult to let them know if it’s ok to drop it. Same with the Mr. or Ms. before their names. We don’t ridicule the kids or punish them, we just remind them, sometimes in humorous ways (exaggerated “sir”). I also say things like “thank you sir” to my kids when they take out the trash or wash the windows. It’s a sign of respect, and it’s expected in these parts. We aren’t trying to be assholes. We’re just teaching our kids as we were taught. There is no assholishness or abuse involved.
I’ll add - there may be asshole parents I’m not aware of that also use this form of communication but I haven’t witnessed a correlation myself.
Before I read the thread, I thought immediately the family is probably Southern. I grew up calling all adults ma’am or sir as a matter of respecting my elders. My mom was no asshole. She was cool as hell.
What Sunspace said. Australians don’t really call anyone “sir”
To address the spirit behind the question, if I think of the two most polite quiet respectful sets of children I know, one set belongs to a very good friend of mine who is herself a quiet well-organised responsible person (and also call herself “a bit of a control freak”) and the other set belongs to my uncle who tried to screw my mother out of her share of their deceased mother’s estate, and with whom we are no longer on speaking terms.
So…could go either way really. If it were combined with other indicators like a lack of obvious affection expressed from parent to child then I’d consider it a red flag, but reserve judgement.
I think this is the main reason why I was so shocked. How can you say someone is an asshole just by this one thing ?? 
I had a hard time not taking it personally when two people in the GQ thread said they would assume the parents were assholes. I’m not an asshole either, but I raised my children to say “ma’am” and “sir”. Like Johnny L.A.'s dad, I addressed them as “sir” and “ma’am” as well.
From the other thread:
I’d assume that anyone who makes that assumption is, himself, a bit of an asshole.
Not at all. Even though my parents didn’t make us address them as sir or ma’am they taught us to address every adult that way.
What I was trying to say in a cutesy way was that no, I would not think they were assholes based only on the sir/ma’am thing alone.
Just to be clear: “Sir” and “Ma’am” usually get pulled out when responding to instructions or questions.
“Johnny, take out the trash.”
“Yes, Ma’am.”
“Johnny, did you finish your homework?”
“Yes, Sir.”
Otherwise, in my experience in the South, parents tend to be addressed in casual conversation as “Momma” and “Daddy.”
“Momma,” pass me the beans, please."
“Daddy, can I have $20?”
No. I would assume they were from Texas.
I’ve known families who did this - they were all Christian and Southern.
spoke: Agreed.
Or like if you call into the next room: “Emily!”
She answers: “Ma’am ?”
I realized that hubby and I do this too.
Him: “Honey!”
Me: “Yessir?”
Or I say something unitelligible:
me: “mumble mumble”
Him: “Ma’am?”
Heh, I was always taught to address others as Sir or Ma’am by my parents, not them themselves. I still tend to call anyone older than me in a position of authority as “sir”/“ma’am” now because of it.
I grew up in VA for what it’s worth.
No. I think the parents are doing a great job of teaching the kids basic concepts of courtesy and respect.
I am surprised at the question. So I guess my answer is no, of course not.
Damn kids these days have no respect. You should call all your elders sir
Damn elders these days expect respect without having necessarily earning it.
Older people have earned respect by being older
Uh, no, they haven’t.
No they haven’t. Being older earns you nothing. Being a stranger earns you polite courtesies until a true judgement is made, but true respect is not automatic.