Silent Night:
…“holy infant so tender and wild”
…“Radiant beans from thy holy face”
Winter Wonderland:
…"Later on we’ll perspire as we drink by the fire.
“R’s for R. E. Diemer…”
Not really a Christmas song, but a Bible song.
In my 1st grade music class, we sang a song called “who built the ark” at least I think that is what it was called.
I didn’t really know what the song was about at that time, but I thought the word were:
Who built the ark, No one, No, one
Who built the ark, brother, no one built the ark 
Of course it was suppose to be Noah
Good King Wenceslaus kicked ass every Christmas morning
Good King Wenceslaus kicked ass, never gave no warning
Good King Wenceslaus went out, drinking and a-whoring
Good King Wenceslaus was crass, Good King Wenceslaus my ass.
God Rest Ye, Merry Gentlemen:
“…Oh, tidings of coppertone joy, coppertone joy
Oh, tidings of coppertone joy”
“Winter wonderland” -
“In the meadow we can build a snowman. We can pretend it is parse and brown.”
Amusingly, I only just realized yesterday that it is supposed to be Parson Brown.
Not a misheard lyric, but every time I heard it, I thought “Good King Wenceslaus…” should be…
“Good King What’s-His-Face looked out
On the Feast of Stephen…”
Just when I thought you couldn’t be any more heroic (yep, you won me over with Lordy Mama, like my shoes) . . .
I thought the exact same thing! As a kid, I always pictured Jesus having long, unruly hair even as a baby.
I can’t think of any other misheard Christmas lyrics, but I was always confused by “Rockin’ Around the Christmas Tree”, where it says “every couple tries to stop”–I was never sure if it meant that every couple tried to stop *under the mistletoe * for some smoochin’, or if it meant that they tried to stop kissing once they got under there so that someone else could have a turn!
You mean…it isn’t that? :eek: All these years…
I thought that the lyric was ‘far from brown’… and yeah, I only figured it out a couple of years ago, too.
“Angels We Have Heard On High”
Glo-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-ria
In Eggshells We Traaa-vel
Stupid Latin.
Jack Frost roasting on an open fire…
Chestnuts nipping at your nose.
OR…
Chipmunks roasting on an open fire…
:eek:
I saw mommy killing Santa Claus
We three kings often tend bar
I thought it was:
Glo-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-ria
In eggshells a day old!
Jpeg Jones, I came up with that one too. You can find it in the “Parody Song Fragments,” under the “traditonal” subhead at this website.
Other Dopers must surely heard of a line like this:
We three kings of Orient are,
Tried to smoke a rubber cigar.
It was loaded and exploded,
That was the end of one king…
Well, obviously, swampy (scroogey?), yours is far more logical…
I used to have a book full of this kind of stuff kids have done:
Teacher (checking a child’s nativity drawing): So, who’s the fat guy?
Kid: Oh, that’s Round John Virgin!
And at Easter:
“Good picture, but why is there an aeroplane in it?”
“That’s for Ponshus the Pilot, silly!”
No, no, no. It’s “Round young virgin.”
And for some reason, I’ve always sung “Sing, all ye denizens of heav’n above” in O Come, All Ye Faithful. Why? I do now know.
I just found this out today.
In “Up On a Rooftop” it’s “Hear the raindeer pause” not “Hear the raindeer paws”
:mad: What’s with that?!