Work on either your jokes or your delivery.
I don’t have earwax buildup, and just use Q-tips after showering to clean up a bit at entry point while having wet ears.
A question arises for Dr. Qadgop, though: Why do some folks make so much earwax? And, is there a treatment that addresses the buildup before it becomes a problem?
I’m all ears.
(Sorry)
I’ve had more experience than I’d like dealing with ear wax, my own and that of my dear family. When it comes down to it, nothing works better than the good old water-pik You’ve gotta take care and use the right temperature water, and the thing had better not be set too high, but sometimes it’s the only thing that’ll get the nasty impacted stuff this group seems to gather in our ears.
-Lil
What do you mean, “sadly?” I know I’m glad of it. 
I tired to find the answer to this question by typing it into google and hit I’m feeling lucky.
Well, here is what popped up. And if you are looking for a new business opprotunity, scroll down the page…
And why you don’t do this…
http://www.quackwatch.org/01QuackeryRelatedTopics/candling.html
Excellent item. Ear candling does not work, and is pretty much only useful as a way to separate marks from their money.
I base this on the experience of my wife. She is a fully-accredited and licensed clinical audiologist. She knows how big ear canals are. And she has had patients ask her if ear candling is worth it, whether they should be seeing an ear candler instead of a doctor, and so on.
So she opted for the empirical method: she went to have her ears candled.
Afterwards, the candler showed her all the stuff that was supposed to have come from her ear. She, knowing the average volume of the human ear, pointed out that this was far too much stuff for the volume of the ear canal. Oh no, the candler pointed out; this wasn’t even the beginning. She’d have to come back, at least once a week. Clean ears are working ears, after all; and when can I put you down for next week?
When my wife revealed her credentials, the candler said she suddenly had another appointment, and my wife would have to go. The appointment for next week was suddenly cancelled.
Scam, scam, scam. In the interest of fighting ignorance, I have to say: Folks, don’t submit to ear candling unless you want to be taken!
I just go to be doctor when it becomes a problem (very rarely)
Yep. Here’s the link to Cecil’s take.
No, no! They do this so they can get to see me! I’m that popular!
And where do they shove their Q-tips?
In other inmates’ ears, of course!
Ear - cleaning can save your marriage. My very own father confessed that he and mom were irritated with each other for some time. He couldn’t figure out why she was so irritable; he was doing nothing differently, so he thought.
She didn’t know why he was yelling at her.
The problem? His buildup of earwax to the point where it cut down his hearing. He STARTED TALKING LOUDER without knowing it, and problems ensued.
A visit to the doc to clean out the crud, and all was well; kisses all around.
It’s never gotten to that point with me, because I am vigilant with the Q-tips. (“Quality-tips,” yeah, right) Many times I’ve felt the stuff actually trickle from the inner ear to the outer, causing an unbearable irritation/tickling sensation. A Q-tip applied at that point can be nearly saturated with fairly thin stuff. If I don’t feel a trickle, and thus aren’t impelled to clean the ears for a day or three, what I do get is thick yellow stuff in moderately heavy quantities.
In defense of the Q-tip, nothing else works quite so well - bobby pins, rolled-up corners of Kleenex or toilet paper, the final joint of my little finger - they can’t touch this stuff where it irritates.
Needless to say, I buy my Q-tips in the 500-count boxes, and have one at home, one at the office, and a little sandwich bag with 20-30 in the glove box of the car and in my travel kit.
Don’t leave home without 'em.
Am I the only one who derives certain “pleasure” from cleaning her ears? I always feel like I am doing something that the nuns in my catholic school would disapprove of.
::cough, cough::
I am not a sexual deviant, I promise. 
Funny enough, my baby daughter, who has to be strapped with chains to have her nails clipped would be really quiet when I clean her ears (no, I don’t dig, I just clean what I can see outside). So I guess I passed on to her whatever it is I have.
Otoeroticism is very common. Everybody does it. Don’t be ashamed.
Hmm… Good to know we are *all *perverts.
These people who tell you not to use Q tips to clean your ears are probably the same people who tell you to trim your toenail straight across, so as to prevent ingrown nails. So with these sharp-cornered toenails, you rip the shit out of whoever you’re sleeping with, which probably poses more of a risk to you than ingrown nails do.
Anyway, we all know - and I’m sure the Q-tip people know - that the main reason we have these things in our house is for our ears. Them posting “warnings” about using then in your ears is like the Budweiser ads warning you to drink responsibly.
I forgot to mention that they have CCTV and a tiny webcam on the instument, so you can watch your ear being cleaned???
Here’s a puzzle, when I clean my right ear, no problem, but when I insert something into my left ear I always gag??
My ear canals are, apparently, mildly scarred from slightly obsessive scratching with cotton wool buds, as we call them here. Don’t try this at home, kids.
Search for the term “eargasm.” It’s been discussed before. You are not alone. Not that I’m saying anything about myself.