Coffee Flavor Of The Day- Make Up YourOwn !!!!

I’m standing in line yesterday at the Starbuck’s Coffee Stand in a New Jersey Turnpike rest stop. This in of itself is an oxymoron, since when I was a wee bairn, the New Jersey Turnpike rest stops meant Howard Johnson’s. But, I digress as usual.

The names and descriptions of their daily blends just cracked me up and so, in the interest of amusement and education, I offer my three fantasy Coffee Beans, and their faux erudite descriptions. Please feel free to expand the list. :smiley:

**Scarsdale Stifflip Supreme. **This arrogant bean comes to us pre-burnt, and all we do is soak it in vodka for 48 hours, then grind the living heck out of it, and serve it tepid. It’s an impetuous bean with a sullen pastyfaced undercurrent.

SoHo NoGo. Our most popular de-caf bean. Stultifyingly ungratifying , yet soothing and just a hinty hint of chammomile to sedate the taster.

Armadillo Peccadillo. The tasty twang of mesquite carries this bean well past a drink and into the realm of an appetizer. Many patrons like to chew them whole. It’s a trip down the highways and byways of TexArkana, right there in your mouth ! Best chewed with a dash Pick A Peppa on them.


I think prehaps a full english coffee bean is needed. You cant go wrong with bacon, sausages, blood pudding and eggs all in one place at the same time.


I’ve always wanted to try Marge Simpson’s most international coffee, Montreal Morn, for obvious reasons.