Commit Cultural Heresy: No Cow Too Sacred.

  1. Coffee tastes bad. Yes, even “good” coffee. No matter how much flavor/cream/sweetener you add, that residual coffee flavor remains. And it tastes bad.

  2. A hamburger sandwich is better than steak. Whatever the quality of the beef, if you grind it up, cook it as a patty, and serve it in a sandwich, it will be better.

  3. Music is boring. It can be interesting for a short while, but after I’ve listened for a bit, I’d rather have quiet.

  4. Poetry is pointless. It can sometimes be interesting, but if you want to write something meaningful, put it in plain English. Quirky syntax, grammar and word choice inhibit the transfer of ideas. If the quirks are your point, then give me some writing that actually says something.

One of us needs his Sacred Cow meters recalibrated.

Theres a killer on the road
His brain is squirmin like a toad
Take a long holiday
Let your children play
If ya give this man a ride
Sweet memory will die
An old man can’t be seen
You know the park bench is green
Two pencils on the chair
I should really cut my hair

Jim Morrison, in my mind you have the dubious honor of getting the farthest in life with the least amount of talent and energy of anyone I have ever known.

Will Wright is a visionary genius, and his games are utterly unlike any other video games on the market. It’s just a pity he’s never figured out a way to make any of them fun.

I’m sick of hearing about John Wooden. Winning truncated tourney schedules with dominating players like Alcindor, Wicks, Hazzrd, and Walton against quite-often second rate competition (Memphis State? Jacksonville? Florida State? Dayton? Purdue?) in a world that had very few quality teams does not the “Undisputed Greatest College Basketball Coach of All TIME”.

His teams were great teams and beat the likes of Kentucky and N Carolina in championships, so their competition wasn’t necessarily all Cinderella’s… but a lot of them were. Plus, his UCLA teams only had to play 4 games each tourney, not 6, and that off a regular season schedule that exceeded 26 games.but once - in 1975. With no conference tournament.

Todays Bruins played 31 regular season games, 3 Pac-10 tourney games, and 5 NCAA tourney games, ending their season 35-4, against much more regular competitive balance than existed in the late-60s, early-70s.

Mr Wooden, if you happen to be reading this, I applaud your success but I’m sick of hearing about it: the conditions that allowed your team to dominate like this are no longer possible in today’s world of hyper-competitive atheletes, schools, and money. So please, from the bottom of my heart: tell your supporters to STFU.

I don’t know if he still qualifies, but Tom Robbins’ works are abysmal self-indulgent crap. Reading his work causes me to literally (in the new figurative sense of the word) vomit. I’ll admit to having only waded through three of his books (all at the behest of young ladies) but the chances of anything written by him being remotely readable based on the sample I have shuddered my way through are so small as to be literally (again, in the new figurative sense of the word) zero.

Yay!

I wonder if it counts as cultural heresy to say Dylan has an excellent voice.

I’m tone deaf :slight_smile:

I largely agree with that. But then I read some Bukowski, and it’s a whole new ballgame.

Halo is a thoroughly mediocre FPS. Nothing it did wasn’t done better on the PC five years prior.

deep breath

I feel so much better.

The Blues. More specific, Chicago Blues, with Delta Blues coming in a close second. Old Black guys who can barely play their guitars, but somehow it’s all legitimate because they’re old Black guys. I don’t get it. Old Black guys who play Jazz I understand because you actually have to be able to play an instrument to play Jazz, but any 8th grader after spending two hours with his dad’s old Sears Silvertone can fake his way through “The Thrill is Gone”.

Also, Major Leage baseball. Yawn.

The first time I read Preacher, I liked it enough to go back to the store and buy every single one of the collections, and I read them through as fast as I could.

But I don’t find myself wanting to re-read them any time soon. Hmmm. :dubious:
Oh, my Sacred Cow nominee: Josh Whedon’s obsession with ass-kicking teenage girls is starting to look pretty unhealthy to me.

Success, American-style.

Being wealthy, owning status symbols, working in the right profession, knowing the right people, being thin and fashionable: Guess what, it doesn’t really matter. In a hundred years, the vast majority of The Successful will be anonymous dead just like the rest of us schlubs.

Last week’s Wife Swap featured just such a family. Their raison d’etre consisted of enrolling their offspring in The Right Classes, so they could get into The Right Schools and The Right Profession (luckily, they were already learning to play golf), so they could be Successful and own a big, huge house just like their parents’. And spend all their free time cleaning it. Just like they were doing now.
Rinse, repeat.

fessie, the Watchbirds might be Watching You. Be careful when you go outside. This kind of subversive thinking cannot be allowed. You do know that, don’t you? :eek:
You are absolutely right, of course. When I can, I remember what my old granny used to say: Will it matter in 100 years?

Mind you, she also used to say, “can it be seen from a galloping horse”? (That was her explanation for not keeping a spotless house.)

San Francisco is the most overrated city in the United States. It’s ridiculously overpriced, the people are not very friendly, and the homeless population is staggering.

A friend of mine who lived in SF for a while used to have a postcard on his fridge featuring a very dilapidated rowhouse. The text on the card read: “Historic Victorian townhouse! Only $1,000,000! Homeless couple in the driveway free with purchase!”

Existentialism and despair as HIGH ART.

Pretentious crap. If I want to be depressed, I’ll watch the news.

On a related note, William Faulkner, Tennessee Williams, and all the Southern Gothic writers. Seediness sucks. Writing about it to high praise from inbred literati is even worse.

And that goes triple for A Condfederacy of Dunces, which is unreadable crap. The Pulitzer committee must have been smoking crack that year.

I don’t normally do “I thought that said…” posts, so I’ll soften my remark by first saying word to your post, Hometownboy.

Now. I got the email update for this, and for the first time saw it as “Commit Cultural Hershey: No Cow Too Sacred.”

Hee.

I think Robin Williams and Billy Crystal are unfunny douche bags.

Haven’t read the whole thread, so it might have been mentioned already. I cannot stand Woody Allen’s movies. People go on and on about his genius and I just don’t get it. Totally not funny.

I don’t like Henry Fonda.

Something about the man…just gets on my nerves.